Danny Salter
@dannysalter.bsky.social
The dimension-hopping scriptwriter for all your semi-favourite unscripted YouTube channels.
Pinned
Danny Salter
@dannysalter.bsky.social
· Jul 15
I often get stopped in the streets by strangers who ask me where I buy my dope threads.
Well...I haven't walked the streets or worn clothes for at least seven years.
But if I did, I'd buy my happening threads from the official Basement Booty store at dannysalter.com
Well...I haven't walked the streets or worn clothes for at least seven years.
But if I did, I'd buy my happening threads from the official Basement Booty store at dannysalter.com
After a month of living back in Rotherham, I've just found secret passages in our new house.
This is EXACTLY what I dreamed about my whole life.
This is EXACTLY what I dreamed about my whole life.
November 18, 2025 at 5:13 PM
After a month of living back in Rotherham, I've just found secret passages in our new house.
This is EXACTLY what I dreamed about my whole life.
This is EXACTLY what I dreamed about my whole life.
Happy 2nd birthday to Woody Salter!
We spent the morning chasing squirrels, and tonight we're baking rhubarb crumble.
We spent the morning chasing squirrels, and tonight we're baking rhubarb crumble.
November 10, 2025 at 1:25 PM
Happy 2nd birthday to Woody Salter!
We spent the morning chasing squirrels, and tonight we're baking rhubarb crumble.
We spent the morning chasing squirrels, and tonight we're baking rhubarb crumble.
Sky Customer Services:
"Please rate our AI Customer Agent out of ten and give us any feedback on how the experience could be improved."
Me:
"0/10. I would have been better off trying to conduct my business with a fucking pot plant."
"Please rate our AI Customer Agent out of ten and give us any feedback on how the experience could be improved."
Me:
"0/10. I would have been better off trying to conduct my business with a fucking pot plant."
November 5, 2025 at 5:28 PM
Sky Customer Services:
"Please rate our AI Customer Agent out of ten and give us any feedback on how the experience could be improved."
Me:
"0/10. I would have been better off trying to conduct my business with a fucking pot plant."
"Please rate our AI Customer Agent out of ten and give us any feedback on how the experience could be improved."
Me:
"0/10. I would have been better off trying to conduct my business with a fucking pot plant."
I should have a new Casual Criminalist landing tomorrow.
I can't remember all the details now but I think it had something to do with a double murder in Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory.
I can't remember all the details now but I think it had something to do with a double murder in Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory.
November 2, 2025 at 11:28 AM
I should have a new Casual Criminalist landing tomorrow.
I can't remember all the details now but I think it had something to do with a double murder in Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory.
I can't remember all the details now but I think it had something to do with a double murder in Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory.
"It's better to piss in the sink than to sink in the piss."
Socrates, 420 BC.
Socrates, 420 BC.
October 22, 2025 at 7:01 AM
"It's better to piss in the sink than to sink in the piss."
Socrates, 420 BC.
Socrates, 420 BC.
According to my Sinclair Pocket Calculator, I've gone for at least 6,205 dog walks in my lifetime.
Still yet to find a single dead body.
Still yet to find a single dead body.
October 20, 2025 at 10:38 AM
According to my Sinclair Pocket Calculator, I've gone for at least 6,205 dog walks in my lifetime.
Still yet to find a single dead body.
Still yet to find a single dead body.
Due later today: My latest script for Decoding the Unknown salutes the forgotten fallen cosmic trailblazers who were wiped from history.
October 17, 2025 at 7:57 PM
Due later today: My latest script for Decoding the Unknown salutes the forgotten fallen cosmic trailblazers who were wiped from history.
My first script for the new ‘Scandal’ channel, presented by Jake Clapham!
This one takes a look at the daytime TV show tragedy in which the greaseball host failed to follow his own manifesto by manning up and growing a pair.
youtu.be/vNiYmOdwFg0?...
This one takes a look at the daytime TV show tragedy in which the greaseball host failed to follow his own manifesto by manning up and growing a pair.
youtu.be/vNiYmOdwFg0?...
October 11, 2025 at 3:43 PM
My first script for the new ‘Scandal’ channel, presented by Jake Clapham!
This one takes a look at the daytime TV show tragedy in which the greaseball host failed to follow his own manifesto by manning up and growing a pair.
youtu.be/vNiYmOdwFg0?...
This one takes a look at the daytime TV show tragedy in which the greaseball host failed to follow his own manifesto by manning up and growing a pair.
youtu.be/vNiYmOdwFg0?...
I'm moving back home to the old haunted mining town of Rotherham next month.
I can't remember the exact reasons why, but I think it had something to do with losing a particularly intense game of Hungry Hungry Hippos.
I can't remember the exact reasons why, but I think it had something to do with losing a particularly intense game of Hungry Hungry Hippos.
September 19, 2025 at 6:05 PM
I'm moving back home to the old haunted mining town of Rotherham next month.
I can't remember the exact reasons why, but I think it had something to do with losing a particularly intense game of Hungry Hungry Hippos.
I can't remember the exact reasons why, but I think it had something to do with losing a particularly intense game of Hungry Hungry Hippos.
"Cornflakes for breakfast this morning. Slasher Spencer got loads more than me as usual.
Finally got freed from prison after 38 years because they realised they’d got the wrong guy.
What a flippin’ palaver! It could only happen to me!
Buy some new underpants.”
New Casual Criminalist coming soon...
Finally got freed from prison after 38 years because they realised they’d got the wrong guy.
What a flippin’ palaver! It could only happen to me!
Buy some new underpants.”
New Casual Criminalist coming soon...
September 3, 2025 at 7:49 AM
"Cornflakes for breakfast this morning. Slasher Spencer got loads more than me as usual.
Finally got freed from prison after 38 years because they realised they’d got the wrong guy.
What a flippin’ palaver! It could only happen to me!
Buy some new underpants.”
New Casual Criminalist coming soon...
Finally got freed from prison after 38 years because they realised they’d got the wrong guy.
What a flippin’ palaver! It could only happen to me!
Buy some new underpants.”
New Casual Criminalist coming soon...
A new video will be broadcast on 'Decoding the Unknown' later today.
Please listen carefully and follow all instructions.
Seal your windows. Block your doors.
The voice of Simon Whistler will be the last you ever hear.
Do not be alarmed.
Please listen carefully and follow all instructions.
Seal your windows. Block your doors.
The voice of Simon Whistler will be the last you ever hear.
Do not be alarmed.
August 28, 2025 at 7:01 AM
A new video will be broadcast on 'Decoding the Unknown' later today.
Please listen carefully and follow all instructions.
Seal your windows. Block your doors.
The voice of Simon Whistler will be the last you ever hear.
Do not be alarmed.
Please listen carefully and follow all instructions.
Seal your windows. Block your doors.
The voice of Simon Whistler will be the last you ever hear.
Do not be alarmed.
I'm about halfway through my autobiography "Forty Years of Wretched Sobbing."
What name would you give to your autobiography?
What name would you give to your autobiography?
August 20, 2025 at 10:03 PM
I'm about halfway through my autobiography "Forty Years of Wretched Sobbing."
What name would you give to your autobiography?
What name would you give to your autobiography?
Alex Jones gets a lot of stick, but I'll say one thing in his defence.
He was the first to really start talking about the interdimensional clockwork elves.
He was the first to really start talking about the interdimensional clockwork elves.
August 20, 2025 at 6:58 AM
Alex Jones gets a lot of stick, but I'll say one thing in his defence.
He was the first to really start talking about the interdimensional clockwork elves.
He was the first to really start talking about the interdimensional clockwork elves.
This DNA profiling lark might not be half as clever as they reckon.
When a direct match with a DNA profile was recently found to shed new light on an unsolved murder case from 1984, the fresh suspect had an alibi which is about as rock solid as they come...
More details in the Casual Criminalist!
When a direct match with a DNA profile was recently found to shed new light on an unsolved murder case from 1984, the fresh suspect had an alibi which is about as rock solid as they come...
More details in the Casual Criminalist!
August 17, 2025 at 10:04 AM
This DNA profiling lark might not be half as clever as they reckon.
When a direct match with a DNA profile was recently found to shed new light on an unsolved murder case from 1984, the fresh suspect had an alibi which is about as rock solid as they come...
More details in the Casual Criminalist!
When a direct match with a DNA profile was recently found to shed new light on an unsolved murder case from 1984, the fresh suspect had an alibi which is about as rock solid as they come...
More details in the Casual Criminalist!
Tomorrow's new Casual Criminalist is an odd one as we cover a rare example of a missing child case that got adapted into a comedy musical.
We also ponder over why nobody cares about missing kids from rough council estates, and briefly suggest that Prince Andrew is a sweaty nonce.
We also ponder over why nobody cares about missing kids from rough council estates, and briefly suggest that Prince Andrew is a sweaty nonce.
July 28, 2025 at 8:59 PM
Tomorrow's new Casual Criminalist is an odd one as we cover a rare example of a missing child case that got adapted into a comedy musical.
We also ponder over why nobody cares about missing kids from rough council estates, and briefly suggest that Prince Andrew is a sweaty nonce.
We also ponder over why nobody cares about missing kids from rough council estates, and briefly suggest that Prince Andrew is a sweaty nonce.
I'm just about to begin work on a new DTU script about the forgotten explorers who fell during the race to the stars.
I can already tell that the research for this one is going to be pretty intense.
I can already tell that the research for this one is going to be pretty intense.
July 18, 2025 at 7:03 AM
I'm just about to begin work on a new DTU script about the forgotten explorers who fell during the race to the stars.
I can already tell that the research for this one is going to be pretty intense.
I can already tell that the research for this one is going to be pretty intense.
I often get stopped in the streets by strangers who ask me where I buy my dope threads.
Well...I haven't walked the streets or worn clothes for at least seven years.
But if I did, I'd buy my happening threads from the official Basement Booty store at dannysalter.com
Well...I haven't walked the streets or worn clothes for at least seven years.
But if I did, I'd buy my happening threads from the official Basement Booty store at dannysalter.com
July 15, 2025 at 9:59 AM
I often get stopped in the streets by strangers who ask me where I buy my dope threads.
Well...I haven't walked the streets or worn clothes for at least seven years.
But if I did, I'd buy my happening threads from the official Basement Booty store at dannysalter.com
Well...I haven't walked the streets or worn clothes for at least seven years.
But if I did, I'd buy my happening threads from the official Basement Booty store at dannysalter.com
It was borderline whether my next script was a Casual Criminalist or a Decoding the Unknown.
So we've gone with the idea of introducing it as a DTU but posting it on CC.
Think that's the right way round.
Also, look out for my upcoming video on genocide on "The Stripping Vicar's Mukbang Mash-Up."
So we've gone with the idea of introducing it as a DTU but posting it on CC.
Think that's the right way round.
Also, look out for my upcoming video on genocide on "The Stripping Vicar's Mukbang Mash-Up."
June 25, 2025 at 7:42 AM
It was borderline whether my next script was a Casual Criminalist or a Decoding the Unknown.
So we've gone with the idea of introducing it as a DTU but posting it on CC.
Think that's the right way round.
Also, look out for my upcoming video on genocide on "The Stripping Vicar's Mukbang Mash-Up."
So we've gone with the idea of introducing it as a DTU but posting it on CC.
Think that's the right way round.
Also, look out for my upcoming video on genocide on "The Stripping Vicar's Mukbang Mash-Up."
Surprising update related to the recent Casual Criminalist video on Rotherham grooming gangs.
The PM has just announced a national inquiry.
www.bbc.com/news/article...
The PM has just announced a national inquiry.
www.bbc.com/news/article...
Sir Keir Starmer announces national inquiry into grooming gangs
Sir Keir Starmer said he had accepted the recommendations of an audit into the nature and scale of the abuse.
www.bbc.com
June 14, 2025 at 7:46 PM
Surprising update related to the recent Casual Criminalist video on Rotherham grooming gangs.
The PM has just announced a national inquiry.
www.bbc.com/news/article...
The PM has just announced a national inquiry.
www.bbc.com/news/article...
Towards the end of his life, legendary TV producer Gerry Anderson was unable to comfortably pass a bowel movement unless he could hear the theme tune to 'Thunderbirds'.
If it wasn't possible to play a recording, he'd ask a family member to hum the theme tune from the other side of the bathroom door.
If it wasn't possible to play a recording, he'd ask a family member to hum the theme tune from the other side of the bathroom door.
June 11, 2025 at 3:39 PM
Towards the end of his life, legendary TV producer Gerry Anderson was unable to comfortably pass a bowel movement unless he could hear the theme tune to 'Thunderbirds'.
If it wasn't possible to play a recording, he'd ask a family member to hum the theme tune from the other side of the bathroom door.
If it wasn't possible to play a recording, he'd ask a family member to hum the theme tune from the other side of the bathroom door.
The next video to land on Decoding the Unknown takes a look at the killer arcade machine from 1981 that sent everyone loopy before it was completely erased from history.
June 3, 2025 at 7:09 AM
The next video to land on Decoding the Unknown takes a look at the killer arcade machine from 1981 that sent everyone loopy before it was completely erased from history.
The new video landing on Casual Criminalist today is a 3-hour deep dive into a topic very close to home, and is the toughest script I’ve ever written.
It’s more than a little grim and I’ve never seen Simon get so angry.
Sorry, Simon.
Probably not one to enjoy with four bottles of wine.
It’s more than a little grim and I’ve never seen Simon get so angry.
Sorry, Simon.
Probably not one to enjoy with four bottles of wine.
May 28, 2025 at 6:42 AM
The new video landing on Casual Criminalist today is a 3-hour deep dive into a topic very close to home, and is the toughest script I’ve ever written.
It’s more than a little grim and I’ve never seen Simon get so angry.
Sorry, Simon.
Probably not one to enjoy with four bottles of wine.
It’s more than a little grim and I’ve never seen Simon get so angry.
Sorry, Simon.
Probably not one to enjoy with four bottles of wine.
OG Business Blaze scripts signed and slapped by Simon are now available to buy, more to follow later.
blaze.fans/en-gbp/produ...
blaze.fans/en-gbp/produ...
May 21, 2025 at 8:11 PM
OG Business Blaze scripts signed and slapped by Simon are now available to buy, more to follow later.
blaze.fans/en-gbp/produ...
blaze.fans/en-gbp/produ...
A perfect morning for catching Heffalumps and Woozles.
May 9, 2025 at 9:15 AM
A perfect morning for catching Heffalumps and Woozles.
It's taken me the best part of forty years but I finally completed Paperboy today.
Might have a go on Ghosts 'n' Goblins next.
Might have a go on Ghosts 'n' Goblins next.
April 25, 2025 at 11:01 AM
It's taken me the best part of forty years but I finally completed Paperboy today.
Might have a go on Ghosts 'n' Goblins next.
Might have a go on Ghosts 'n' Goblins next.