John Daglish
@daglish.info
Currently sat on the surface of the sun
December 25, 2025 at 5:24 PM
Currently sat on the surface of the sun
I pray my wish will come true
December 24, 2025 at 12:40 AM
I pray my wish will come true
Reposted by John Daglish
![[Scene is a kitchen - a middle aged woman called JANET is boiling peas at the stove. A younger more colourfully dressed woman named LIZ approached her.]
JANET:
Ugh...
LIZ:
What's up?
JANET:
I am so bored of cooking peas!
LIZ:
Have you tried...
AI peas?
JANET:
AI peas?
LIZ:
They're peas with AI!
[Liz holds up to us a packet of peas labelled: Pea-i AI - Peas with AI].
LIZ:
Al-powered peas harness the potential of your peas
JANET:
What
LIZ [Now a voiceover as we cut to a whizzy technology diagram of peas all connected by meaningless dotted lines]
Why not take your peas to the next level with Al Peas' new Al tools to power your peas?
[Show a techno diagram of a pea with a label reading 'AI' pointing to a random zone in it]
LIZ:
Each pea has Al in a way we haven't quite worked out yet but it's fine
[Show Janet and Liz now in a Matrix-style world of peas]
LIZ:
With Al peas you can supercharge productivity and make AI work for your peas!
JANET:
What
LIZ:
Shut up
LIZ:
Our game-changing Pea-Al gives you the freedom to unlock the potential of the power of the future of your peas workflow
From opening the bag of peas
to boiling the peas
to eating the peas
To spending millions on adding Al to the peas and then having to work out what that even means.
JANET:
Is it really necessary to-
LIZ [Grabbing Janet by the collar]:
THE PEAS HAVE GOT AI, JANET
[Cut to an advert ending screen, with the bag of peas and the slogan:
AI PEAS: Just 'Peas' for god's sake buy the AI peas.
[Ends]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:4m3we4apbjayclzcnhwe3pfp/bafkreiayqa37f7kik7l7s7fbtfp2sir5ckb662ry2lylinyjrfa2rkvvka@jpeg)
Scott lavene was awesome tonight
October 17, 2025 at 10:47 PM
Scott lavene was awesome tonight
Do you think you could learn to relove me?
September 26, 2025 at 10:39 PM
Do you think you could learn to relove me?
Ashamed because some arsehole called me thick because I questioned the fact that “woman are being raped”. Scum are brazen at the moment
August 23, 2025 at 9:19 PM
Ashamed because some arsehole called me thick because I questioned the fact that “woman are being raped”. Scum are brazen at the moment
Reposted by John Daglish
I’ve mulled over posting this for months now. But yesterday it came to a head. And I’m aware that the people who need to see it will either not be here, or will suggest that I’m lying.
I live near an asylum hotel. The reason I didn’t post earlier is that I didn’t want to raise undue attention
I live near an asylum hotel. The reason I didn’t post earlier is that I didn’t want to raise undue attention
August 16, 2025 at 9:17 AM
I’ve mulled over posting this for months now. But yesterday it came to a head. And I’m aware that the people who need to see it will either not be here, or will suggest that I’m lying.
I live near an asylum hotel. The reason I didn’t post earlier is that I didn’t want to raise undue attention
I live near an asylum hotel. The reason I didn’t post earlier is that I didn’t want to raise undue attention
Lower Body Spray! Fuck off
June 6, 2025 at 2:28 PM
Lower Body Spray! Fuck off
I never thought I’d be Jeremy Beadled by Jim White!
February 14, 2025 at 11:42 PM
I never thought I’d be Jeremy Beadled by Jim White!
VAR will be interesting
December 26, 2024 at 8:05 PM
VAR will be interesting
Actually felt xmassy for the first time in 5 years
December 23, 2024 at 11:56 PM
Actually felt xmassy for the first time in 5 years
When did little Xmas pudding truffles become a luxury item?
December 17, 2024 at 7:26 PM
When did little Xmas pudding truffles become a luxury item?
MJ Lenderman + terrifying M62 drive home = perfect Thursday night
November 22, 2024 at 12:59 AM
MJ Lenderman + terrifying M62 drive home = perfect Thursday night