World’s Greatest Dad
@dadthoughts.bsky.social
I decided to make this account while my kid was pooping. Deep thoughts only.
Still can’t believe someone somewhere was lucky enough to find drugs in their Halloween candy
November 23, 2025 at 1:15 AM
Still can’t believe someone somewhere was lucky enough to find drugs in their Halloween candy
Have been looking for drugs in kiddo’s Halloween candy and none so far. Having to hit my own stash. In this economy.
November 1, 2025 at 2:27 AM
Have been looking for drugs in kiddo’s Halloween candy and none so far. Having to hit my own stash. In this economy.
Should prob smoke some tbh
September 27, 2025 at 1:51 AM
Should prob smoke some tbh
MPD up in the Nats game
August 16, 2025 at 9:13 PM
MPD up in the Nats game
Buy 8 get 1 free lol
May 18, 2025 at 4:33 AM
Buy 8 get 1 free lol
Happy 4/20 you degenerates
April 20, 2025 at 6:17 PM
Happy 4/20 you degenerates
Reposted by World’s Greatest Dad
Elon Musk cheated at video games. He did so on Joe Biden’s watch.
January 26, 2025 at 4:43 PM
Elon Musk cheated at video games. He did so on Joe Biden’s watch.
We now enter day two of being stuck at home
January 7, 2025 at 3:05 PM
We now enter day two of being stuck at home
Ronin remains a top tier movie
a man says what colour is the boathouse in front of a woman
Alt: Deniro in Ronin asking what colour is the boathouse
media.tenor.com
January 4, 2025 at 8:15 PM
Ronin remains a top tier movie
Uninstalled some useless crap on the wife’s computer. Essential work tbh
January 3, 2025 at 2:32 AM
Uninstalled some useless crap on the wife’s computer. Essential work tbh
The bottom of the tincture bottle is way stronger than I expected and other things I didn’t expect to deal with this feisty Sunday morning
December 8, 2024 at 12:57 PM
The bottom of the tincture bottle is way stronger than I expected and other things I didn’t expect to deal with this feisty Sunday morning
Reposted by World’s Greatest Dad
During Covid lockdown, if you had family round on Christmas Day the police could force their way into your home and make them return to their own homes.
Does anybody know if this service is still available and, if so, do you have to book it?
Does anybody know if this service is still available and, if so, do you have to book it?
December 7, 2024 at 12:42 PM
During Covid lockdown, if you had family round on Christmas Day the police could force their way into your home and make them return to their own homes.
Does anybody know if this service is still available and, if so, do you have to book it?
Does anybody know if this service is still available and, if so, do you have to book it?
Always remember to check your 510 carts before throwing them out. You never know when some extra oil might’ve gathered at the bottom. And then you gotta take care of it
a rainbow colored shooting star with the words the mo you know above it
Alt: The more you know gif
media.tenor.com
December 7, 2024 at 11:50 AM
Always remember to check your 510 carts before throwing them out. You never know when some extra oil might’ve gathered at the bottom. And then you gotta take care of it
What’s the winter equivalent of swamp ass?
December 5, 2024 at 3:45 PM
What’s the winter equivalent of swamp ass?
Kid is away for the moment 😇
November 29, 2024 at 5:07 PM
Kid is away for the moment 😇
Thanksgiving is tomorrow. If you haven't gotten booze for tomorrow yet, you better hurry up
November 28, 2024 at 2:10 AM
Thanksgiving is tomorrow. If you haven't gotten booze for tomorrow yet, you better hurry up
Reposted by World’s Greatest Dad
If you want to have a successful Bluesky post just ask yourself “is this something an old person would complain about?” If yes, then press post as fast as you fuckin can
November 27, 2024 at 11:46 PM
If you want to have a successful Bluesky post just ask yourself “is this something an old person would complain about?” If yes, then press post as fast as you fuckin can
No but seriously the Amazon Prime Video app is trash
November 22, 2024 at 3:39 AM
No but seriously the Amazon Prime Video app is trash
Kiddo is sleeping, time to smoke
November 18, 2024 at 12:53 AM
Kiddo is sleeping, time to smoke
Now excuse me while I wait for the tincture to hit
November 17, 2024 at 2:18 PM
Now excuse me while I wait for the tincture to hit
I threw away three letters from my insurance company that all together tell me that yes, you have successfully renewed your insurance.
Why wasn't this an email?
Why wasn't this an email?
November 17, 2024 at 2:17 PM
I threw away three letters from my insurance company that all together tell me that yes, you have successfully renewed your insurance.
Why wasn't this an email?
Why wasn't this an email?
The night of the endless car alarm
November 13, 2024 at 12:01 AM
The night of the endless car alarm
How dare you have AirPods on at the playground. This is a shared misery space.
November 11, 2024 at 8:41 PM
How dare you have AirPods on at the playground. This is a shared misery space.
So you’re telling me this is another day without school?
a black and white photo of a man sitting in front of a tv that says tvland classic
Alt: a black and white photo of a man sitting in front of a tv that says tvland classic
media.tenor.com
November 11, 2024 at 1:32 PM
So you’re telling me this is another day without school?