Jingle Chicken
@chickengrrl.bsky.social
DELICATE LIKE A RATTLESNAKE
Awaiting work visa for Uranus
100% Croutonian
Light #AnimalCaucus use
📍Anhedonia
Awaiting work visa for Uranus
she/her/y’all
Indicting ham sandwiches since 1985
Enough with the fitted sheets already
Awaiting work visa for Uranus
100% Croutonian
Light #AnimalCaucus use
📍Anhedonia
Awaiting work visa for Uranus
she/her/y’all
Indicting ham sandwiches since 1985
Enough with the fitted sheets already
Pinned
Jingle Chicken
@chickengrrl.bsky.social
· Sep 12
Donate to Keep Diane's Sanctuary Dream Alive, organized by Beth Hyman
Update: An extaordinary amount has been happening behind the scenes here at Squirrelwood… Beth Hyman needs your support for Keep Diane's Sanctuary Dream Alive
gofund.me
Many of us remember what a sanctuary Crouton & Friends was for US during the scary early days of lockdown. It was a source of calm & sanity in the face of the unknown.
Now they need our help. Let’s thank them for everything they do by donating to keep the sanctuary we love alive.
LFG, Croutonia!
Now they need our help. Let’s thank them for everything they do by donating to keep the sanctuary we love alive.
LFG, Croutonia!
I am not allowed to eat chocolate unless I’m standing at the sink. Wearing a bib. Maybe a throw rug.
a person is sitting in a pink container with their eyes closed and their head is visible .
Alt: Augustus Gloop from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory trapped in a vacuum tube filled with chocolate. The liquid chocolate is building up pressure below him and soon he will be sucked away, never to be heard from again. (He may make an appearance at the end of the movie but I forget.)
Not my best work. Sorry.
media.tenor.com
December 21, 2025 at 4:08 AM
I am not allowed to eat chocolate unless I’m standing at the sink. Wearing a bib. Maybe a throw rug.
I keep thinking of the Friends episode where Ross dates a woman who lives in filth. When they break up, Monica shows up at the woman’s door with a bucket of cleaning products. “Ross told me about your apartment and I couldn't sleep.”
I desperately need a Monica right now.😹🧼🫧🧹🧺
I desperately need a Monica right now.😹🧼🫧🧹🧺
a man is sitting on a couch in a cluttered room
Alt: Terrible quality GIF of Ross from Friends in his girlfriend’s disgusting apartment, sitting on the arm of the couch and immediately jumping up because he knows he sat on something gross.
media.tenor.com
December 13, 2025 at 9:02 PM
I keep thinking of the Friends episode where Ross dates a woman who lives in filth. When they break up, Monica shows up at the woman’s door with a bucket of cleaning products. “Ross told me about your apartment and I couldn't sleep.”
I desperately need a Monica right now.😹🧼🫧🧹🧺
I desperately need a Monica right now.😹🧼🫧🧹🧺
I’m really disappointed in the amount of shits and asses. I gotta step up my game.
@ohdangitevie.bsky.social, if we go by totally swears, I beat you by one point: 79 to 78.
@ohdangitevie.bsky.social, if we go by totally swears, I beat you by one point: 79 to 78.
@chickengrrl.bsky.social has swears! They've used 200 profanities in their last 2,145 posts.
🥇 "fuck" (40 times)
🥈 "ass" (21 times)
🥉 "shit" (18 times)
🥇 "fuck" (40 times)
🥈 "ass" (21 times)
🥉 "shit" (18 times)
November 30, 2025 at 9:46 PM
I’m really disappointed in the amount of shits and asses. I gotta step up my game.
@ohdangitevie.bsky.social, if we go by totally swears, I beat you by one point: 79 to 78.
@ohdangitevie.bsky.social, if we go by totally swears, I beat you by one point: 79 to 78.
@profanity.accountant, I like to think of myself as demure and sweet. Tell me the truth.
November 30, 2025 at 8:43 PM
@profanity.accountant, I like to think of myself as demure and sweet. Tell me the truth.
Thank dog for local public/indie radio. Heard this banger on my way to the doctor’s office. Made the traffic almost worth it.
New Order - Age of Consent (2020 Remaster) [Official Music Video]
YouTube video by New Order
youtube.com
November 26, 2025 at 10:05 PM
Thank dog for local public/indie radio. Heard this banger on my way to the doctor’s office. Made the traffic almost worth it.
Next verse
Same as the first
Same as the first
Dear hair:
You can be either flat or frizzy.
You can have wimpy waves or be a big stringy mess.
Be bad enough to avoid mirrors, or bad enough not to leave the house.
Please pick only ONE way to piss me off, or you know what comes next.
Love,
Chicken
You can be either flat or frizzy.
You can have wimpy waves or be a big stringy mess.
Be bad enough to avoid mirrors, or bad enough not to leave the house.
Please pick only ONE way to piss me off, or you know what comes next.
Love,
Chicken
a woman in a pink robe looks at her hair in the mirror
Alt: White woman with shoulder-length strawberry-blonde hair, looking in the mirror while swiping hair clippers across the center of her scalp, clearly intending to shave her entire head. I feel ya, lady.
media.tenor.com
November 24, 2025 at 11:56 PM
Next verse
Same as the first
Same as the first
It’s like they saw right into my head. Or stomach.
November 24, 2025 at 8:17 PM
It’s like they saw right into my head. Or stomach.
November 22, 2025 at 11:48 PM
Me: Oh, fuck it
Also me: I’m gonna have a party
(Anyone?)
Also me: I’m gonna have a party
(Anyone?)
a painting of a woman laying in a bed with a blue blanket and a white pillow
Alt: Painting of a pale woman in bed, under the covers. Her hands are outside the covers, and one is contorted. She looks very ill, but as the gif zooms in on her face, it appears as if she’s actually dead.
media.tenor.com
November 21, 2025 at 7:27 PM
Me: Oh, fuck it
Also me: I’m gonna have a party
(Anyone?)
Also me: I’m gonna have a party
(Anyone?)
November 15, 2025 at 9:13 PM
Well, I’m back. What’d I miss?
a green field with trees in the background
Alt: Red chicken peeking over the edge of… something
media.tenor.com
November 15, 2025 at 2:00 AM
Well, I’m back. What’d I miss?
a city skyline at night with the cn tower in the center
Alt: Toronto skyline at night
media.tenor.com
October 29, 2025 at 12:13 AM
And this is how the world ends, not with a bang but with a monkey
Monkeys escape after crash in Jasper County
JASPER COUNTY, Miss. (WHLT) – A truck hauling 21 monkeys to a testing facility in Florida overturned in Jasper County, Mississippi, on October 28, 2025. According to the Jasper County Sheriff…
www.wjtv.com
October 28, 2025 at 10:03 PM
And this is how the world ends, not with a bang but with a monkey
Will somebody please bring me some dinner? You don’t even have to peel the grapes.
jerry from tom and jerry is wearing a diaper and standing on a bridge .
Alt: Jerry the mouse from Tom and Jerry, pointing to his wide-open mouth, clearly demanding to be fed
media.tenor.com
October 28, 2025 at 1:11 AM
Will somebody please bring me some dinner? You don’t even have to peel the grapes.
<whine whine whine whine whine>
Possible diagnoses:
1. Factitious disorder
2. Münchausen syndrome
3. Malingering
4. Hypochondria
</whiiiine>
Possible diagnoses:
1. Factitious disorder
2. Münchausen syndrome
3. Malingering
4. Hypochondria
</whiiiine>
a man is making a funny face with the words whomr whomp written below him
Alt: David, played by Dan Levy, from Schitt’s Creek, making a pouty face and saying, “Whomp whomp.”
media.tenor.com
October 27, 2025 at 12:04 AM
<whine whine whine whine whine>
Possible diagnoses:
1. Factitious disorder
2. Münchausen syndrome
3. Malingering
4. Hypochondria
</whiiiine>
Possible diagnoses:
1. Factitious disorder
2. Münchausen syndrome
3. Malingering
4. Hypochondria
</whiiiine>
BASEBALLS ON SARAH
IYKYK
IYKYK
a man wearing a blue jays jersey stands on the field
Alt: George Springer, the outfielder and designated hitter for the Toronto Blue Jays, his uniform muddy from sliding into a base, pumping a fist in the air and shouting, “LET’S GO!”
media.tenor.com
October 25, 2025 at 12:09 AM
BASEBALLS ON SARAH
IYKYK
IYKYK
Things that live rent-free in my head,
#73: LL Cool J circa 1990, in one of the coolest, most iconic episodes of MTV Unplugged
#73: LL Cool J circa 1990, in one of the coolest, most iconic episodes of MTV Unplugged
LL Cool J - Mama Said Knock You Out (Live)
YouTube video by Party Artie (U.S.S.R)
youtube.com
October 24, 2025 at 8:56 PM
Things that live rent-free in my head,
#73: LL Cool J circa 1990, in one of the coolest, most iconic episodes of MTV Unplugged
#73: LL Cool J circa 1990, in one of the coolest, most iconic episodes of MTV Unplugged
I’ve never seen “Now You See Me.” Current events in France tell me this might be a great time to watch it.
a woman is wearing a tiara and saying of course i do i 'm a princess and this is my tiara
Alt: Mayim Bialik as Amy Fowler on “The Big Bang Theory,” wearing a tiara and exclaiming, “Of course I do I’m a princess and this is my tiara!”
media.tenor.com
October 23, 2025 at 1:25 AM
I’ve never seen “Now You See Me.” Current events in France tell me this might be a great time to watch it.
How do we stop him?
CAN we stop him?
CAN we stop him?
October 22, 2025 at 9:26 PM
How do we stop him?
CAN we stop him?
CAN we stop him?
WHAT THE FUCK DOES SEATTLE HAVE AGAINST GEORGE SPRINGER
a baseball player with the number 18 on their jersey
Alt: Baseball home plate tableau: umpire, catcher, and batter. The batter gets hit by a pitch and falls down as if he’s been shot
media.tenor.com
October 21, 2025 at 12:32 AM
WHAT THE FUCK DOES SEATTLE HAVE AGAINST GEORGE SPRINGER
And oh, so many more…
Not to be THAT dictionary, but…
It’s ‘per se,’ not ‘per say.’
It’s ‘dog-eat-dog world,’ not ‘doggy-dog world.’
It’s ‘hunger pangs,’ not ‘hunger pains.’
It’s ‘one and the same,’ not ‘one in the same.’
It's 'buck naked,' not 'butt naked.'
It’s ‘per se,’ not ‘per say.’
It’s ‘dog-eat-dog world,’ not ‘doggy-dog world.’
It’s ‘hunger pangs,’ not ‘hunger pains.’
It’s ‘one and the same,’ not ‘one in the same.’
It's 'buck naked,' not 'butt naked.'
October 21, 2025 at 12:01 AM
And oh, so many more…
This sweet baby (in Austin) needs a forever family—and DESERVES one, especially since humans have treated him so badly. I normally only share kitties, but this “underdog” touched me. Can anyone in Austin (or Texas or anywhere) give a home to precious Kanga, or can you share? 🥰💜
‘Underdog’ was shot, lost a leg and has been overlooked for 1,100 days in Texas
Sweet Kanga was adopted but returned, the Texas shelter said.
www.star-telegram.com
October 21, 2025 at 12:00 AM
This sweet baby (in Austin) needs a forever family—and DESERVES one, especially since humans have treated him so badly. I normally only share kitties, but this “underdog” touched me. Can anyone in Austin (or Texas or anywhere) give a home to precious Kanga, or can you share? 🥰💜
Reposted by Jingle Chicken
I'm posting an updated Pesto fundraiser. I added in all the details on GoFundMe. We are cautiously optimistic because she is slowly responding to the very expensive medication Marquis. She is also being treated for Lyme. Plus lots of vet visits and fluids/ bloodwork. gofund.me/ee16714e
October 19, 2025 at 11:26 PM
I'm posting an updated Pesto fundraiser. I added in all the details on GoFundMe. We are cautiously optimistic because she is slowly responding to the very expensive medication Marquis. She is also being treated for Lyme. Plus lots of vet visits and fluids/ bloodwork. gofund.me/ee16714e