𝐁𝐫𝐞𝐭 𝐁𝐚𝐭𝐬𝐨𝐧
@bretbatson.bsky.social
My week beats your year.
𝘊𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘥𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘚𝘵𝘢𝘺-𝘈𝘵-𝘏𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘋𝘢𝘥
𝙷𝚎/𝙷𝚒𝚖 𝚌𝚒𝚜/𝚑𝚎𝚝𝒮𝓌𝒾𝒻𝓉𝒾ℯ
𝘊𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘥𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘚𝘵𝘢𝘺-𝘈𝘵-𝘏𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘋𝘢𝘥
𝙷𝚎/𝙷𝚒𝚖 𝚌𝚒𝚜/𝚑𝚎𝚝𝒮𝓌𝒾𝒻𝓉𝒾ℯ
Heterosexual, because it’s overdue for a comeback.
Pansexual, bc I like a thick-crust.
Demisexual, because I’m bite sized
December 27, 2025 at 1:14 AM
Heterosexual, because it’s overdue for a comeback.
December 25, 2025 at 1:30 PM
"The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live."
- George Carlin (1937-2008)
- George Carlin (1937-2008)
December 24, 2025 at 1:55 PM
"The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live."
- George Carlin (1937-2008)
- George Carlin (1937-2008)
“The Activia is working Papa Smurf! Lazy Smurf hadn’t smurfed in a week and now he can’t stop smurfing his brains out!”
December 22, 2025 at 2:20 PM
“The Activia is working Papa Smurf! Lazy Smurf hadn’t smurfed in a week and now he can’t stop smurfing his brains out!”
NGL This “redacted” version of ‘Home Alone 2: Lost in New York’ on TNT is the bees knees.
December 22, 2025 at 1:20 AM
NGL This “redacted” version of ‘Home Alone 2: Lost in New York’ on TNT is the bees knees.
It would appear that God only has a two minute lead on the Devil. 😳
December 17, 2025 at 8:48 PM
It would appear that God only has a two minute lead on the Devil. 😳
🎶 He’s dreaming of a 𝒲ℋℐ𝒯ℰ𝒮 𝒪𝒩ℒ𝒴 Christmas. Just like the ones he used to know. 🎶
December 17, 2025 at 2:30 PM
🎶 He’s dreaming of a 𝒲ℋℐ𝒯ℰ𝒮 𝒪𝒩ℒ𝒴 Christmas. Just like the ones he used to know. 🎶
George Harrison - Give Me Love (Give Me Peace on Earth) [Official Video]
YouTube video by George Harrison
youtu.be
December 16, 2025 at 5:15 PM
This is terrible. #RobReiner
2 People Found Dead at Rob Reiner's Los Angeles Home
Two people were found dead at a home in a West L.A. house owned by Rob Reiner and his wife Michele Sunday ... TMZ has confirmed.
www.tmz.com
December 15, 2025 at 2:55 AM
This is terrible. #RobReiner
🎅🏻 A timely reminder that if you want to sound worldly (re: old), it’s “…Cupid, DONDER, and BLIXEM”.
December 14, 2025 at 2:10 PM
🎅🏻 A timely reminder that if you want to sound worldly (re: old), it’s “…Cupid, DONDER, and BLIXEM”.
🎂 An extra special Happy 100th Birthday to the timeless treasure that is Mr. Dick Van Dyke! 🎂
a man in a striped jacket is walking with three penguins behind him
Alt: a man in a striped jacket is walking with four penguins behind him
media.tenor.com
December 13, 2025 at 2:31 PM
🎂 An extra special Happy 100th Birthday to the timeless treasure that is Mr. Dick Van Dyke! 🎂
At only 28 years old, Sydney Sweeney has already written a memoir about her career.
December 11, 2025 at 7:02 PM
At only 28 years old, Sydney Sweeney has already written a memoir about her career.
❤️🔥 𝕆𝕟𝕖 𝕐𝕖𝕒𝕣 𝔸𝕘𝕠 𝕋𝕠𝕕𝕒𝕪 ❤️🔥
Miss 𝕋𝕒𝕪𝕝𝕠𝕣 𝕊𝕨𝕚𝕗𝕥 plays the final show of 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝔼𝕣𝕒𝕤 𝕋𝕠𝕦𝕣 in Vancouver, BC.
#TaylorSwift ❤️🔥 #TheErasTour
Miss 𝕋𝕒𝕪𝕝𝕠𝕣 𝕊𝕨𝕚𝕗𝕥 plays the final show of 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝔼𝕣𝕒𝕤 𝕋𝕠𝕦𝕣 in Vancouver, BC.
#TaylorSwift ❤️🔥 #TheErasTour
That’s it! The end of an era.
💙 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝔼𝕣𝕒𝕤 𝕋𝕠𝕦𝕣 is officially over. 😭 Thank you to 𝕄𝕚𝕤𝕤 𝕋𝕒𝕪𝕝𝕠𝕣 𝕊𝕨𝕚𝕗𝕥 for giving us the greatest tour of all time. 💙
#TaylorSwift #TheErasTour
💙 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝔼𝕣𝕒𝕤 𝕋𝕠𝕦𝕣 is officially over. 😭 Thank you to 𝕄𝕚𝕤𝕤 𝕋𝕒𝕪𝕝𝕠𝕣 𝕊𝕨𝕚𝕗𝕥 for giving us the greatest tour of all time. 💙
#TaylorSwift #TheErasTour
December 8, 2025 at 10:00 PM
❤️🔥 𝕆𝕟𝕖 𝕐𝕖𝕒𝕣 𝔸𝕘𝕠 𝕋𝕠𝕕𝕒𝕪 ❤️🔥
Miss 𝕋𝕒𝕪𝕝𝕠𝕣 𝕊𝕨𝕚𝕗𝕥 plays the final show of 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝔼𝕣𝕒𝕤 𝕋𝕠𝕦𝕣 in Vancouver, BC.
#TaylorSwift ❤️🔥 #TheErasTour
Miss 𝕋𝕒𝕪𝕝𝕠𝕣 𝕊𝕨𝕚𝕗𝕥 plays the final show of 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝔼𝕣𝕒𝕤 𝕋𝕠𝕦𝕣 in Vancouver, BC.
#TaylorSwift ❤️🔥 #TheErasTour
Movie theaters forever.
December 8, 2025 at 12:42 AM
Movie theaters forever.
Katy Perry turned into Kathy Griffin so quickly, I noticed right away.
December 6, 2025 at 8:10 PM
Katy Perry turned into Kathy Griffin so quickly, I noticed right away.
Ruin a song by changing the lyrics.
🎶 Somewhere over Laredo 🎶
Lainey Wilson had it comin’.
🎶 Somewhere over Laredo 🎶
Lainey Wilson had it comin’.
Ruin a song by changing the lyrics.
🎶Knock, knock, knocking on Kevin's door.🎶
🎶Knock, knock, knocking on Kevin's door.🎶
December 6, 2025 at 5:56 PM
Ruin a song by changing the lyrics.
🎶 Somewhere over Laredo 🎶
Lainey Wilson had it comin’.
🎶 Somewhere over Laredo 🎶
Lainey Wilson had it comin’.
Come back to us @savagewhit.bsky.social !
a picture of a fountain with the words it 's been seven hours and fifteen days below it
ALT: a picture of a fountain with the words it 's been seven hours and fifteen days below it
media.tenor.com
December 6, 2025 at 2:30 PM
Come back to us @savagewhit.bsky.social !
It’s official. 😑
All I can say is, things could have gone worse.
All I can say is, things could have gone worse.
Netflix to Acquire Warner Bros. Following the Separation of Discovery Global for a Total Enterprise Value of $82.7 Billion (Equity Value of $72.0 Billion) - About Netflix
about.netflix.com
December 5, 2025 at 12:52 PM
It’s official. 😑
All I can say is, things could have gone worse.
All I can say is, things could have gone worse.
![NOW INTRODUCING
ELF IN MYSELF
[an X-ray shows an elf had been inserted]
“Do you remove the one from last year first?”
[an X-ray shows a candy cane has been inserted]
“So that's what those things are for.”](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:i7tfw64az7hsyntibkiwvkhc/bafkreibof2zfzmbbsrkkvo3urb5hauqonuuw4xva6idcnt4egloxkpx75e@jpeg)