brandon
@brandowrites.bsky.social
Work published in Eater, Epicurious, VinePair, Wine Enthusiast, and elsewhere.
📍Chicago, IL
🇵🇸From the river to the sea🇵🇸
IG: brando_writes
📍Chicago, IL
🇵🇸From the river to the sea🇵🇸
IG: brando_writes
Pinned
Big bautumn autumn
September 30, 2025 at 5:24 PM
Big bautumn autumn
Reposted by brandon
Only Charli I know is xcx and she’s fine so
September 10, 2025 at 8:09 PM
Only Charli I know is xcx and she’s fine so
Reposted by brandon
"I think it's worth to have a cost of, unfortunately, some gun deaths every single year so that we can have the Second Amendment to protect our other God-given rights" - Charlie Kirk, 2023
www.mediamatters.org/charlie-kirk...
www.mediamatters.org/charlie-kirk...
September 10, 2025 at 6:50 PM
"I think it's worth to have a cost of, unfortunately, some gun deaths every single year so that we can have the Second Amendment to protect our other God-given rights" - Charlie Kirk, 2023
www.mediamatters.org/charlie-kirk...
www.mediamatters.org/charlie-kirk...
“So do you think he’s dead? Was that a body double? A clone? Maybe they’re pulling a weekend at Bernie’s? Anyways, that dom top texted me.”
September 2, 2025 at 9:12 PM
“So do you think he’s dead? Was that a body double? A clone? Maybe they’re pulling a weekend at Bernie’s? Anyways, that dom top texted me.”
Happy Labor Day y’all. May we all unionize our workplaces and shake the money down from the top of the ladder. 👊🏻
September 1, 2025 at 11:07 PM
Happy Labor Day y’all. May we all unionize our workplaces and shake the money down from the top of the ladder. 👊🏻
Having a wonderful end of the summer, hbu?
August 26, 2025 at 3:31 PM
Having a wonderful end of the summer, hbu?
Reposted by brandon
Now that it's been a few days, I wanted to share some of my favorite pieces I wrote for Eater over the 6+ years I was there. First off, I got to write a lot about the intersection of food and queerness, culminating in this piece that got me a JBFA nomination www.eater.com/24162871/foo...
The Food That Makes You Gay
Too many people grow up fearing what food might reveal about themselves. Maybe it’s time we embrace self-discovery.
www.eater.com
August 18, 2025 at 4:25 PM
Now that it's been a few days, I wanted to share some of my favorite pieces I wrote for Eater over the 6+ years I was there. First off, I got to write a lot about the intersection of food and queerness, culminating in this piece that got me a JBFA nomination www.eater.com/24162871/foo...
Reposted by brandon
just thinking about things
August 6, 2025 at 10:18 PM
just thinking about things
Being gay and a writer has fundamentally altered the way I hear “Trade Publication” like damn trade has an official magazine now?
August 6, 2025 at 4:40 PM
Being gay and a writer has fundamentally altered the way I hear “Trade Publication” like damn trade has an official magazine now?
Also hey here’s these
August 6, 2025 at 4:35 PM
Also hey here’s these
New, from me, for Eater Chicago. Hamburger Mary’s has finally returned to Chicago. Great new space that’s as gay as ever 💃🏻🪩💅🏻
chicago.eater.com/openings/161...
chicago.eater.com/openings/161...
A Drag Icon Is Reborn in Edgewater as Hamburger Mary’s Reopens
The burger bar has persevered through the pandemic and political turmoil
chicago.eater.com
August 6, 2025 at 4:21 PM
New, from me, for Eater Chicago. Hamburger Mary’s has finally returned to Chicago. Great new space that’s as gay as ever 💃🏻🪩💅🏻
chicago.eater.com/openings/161...
chicago.eater.com/openings/161...
Biergarten betrunken meine Freunde
July 15, 2025 at 12:13 AM
Biergarten betrunken meine Freunde
I don’t get why so many gays are mean when you can wear flowers and tell people they’re hot and you love seeing them on the dance floor
June 13, 2025 at 8:13 AM
I don’t get why so many gays are mean when you can wear flowers and tell people they’re hot and you love seeing them on the dance floor
Reposted by brandon
Queer food is eating lobster mac and cheese in one of the nation’s oldest taverns where the founding fathers got pissed drunk as “Good Luck Babe!” plays over the bar’s speakers
June 10, 2025 at 11:47 PM
Queer food is eating lobster mac and cheese in one of the nation’s oldest taverns where the founding fathers got pissed drunk as “Good Luck Babe!” plays over the bar’s speakers
Imagine hating me and I’m just in my existential crisis void like
June 7, 2025 at 3:44 PM
Imagine hating me and I’m just in my existential crisis void like
Grateful for warm weather at the start of this Pride season
June 2, 2025 at 9:39 PM
Grateful for warm weather at the start of this Pride season
Reposted by brandon
Why would I, as a customer, pay $300 a person for a meal where the chef completely outsourced their creativity? At that level your own imagination is precisely what I'm paying you for, what an L and an insult to admit you can't do it and charge me anyway. www.nytimes.com/2025/06/02/d...
This Year’s Hot New Tool for Chefs? ChatGPT.
www.nytimes.com
June 2, 2025 at 5:59 PM
Why would I, as a customer, pay $300 a person for a meal where the chef completely outsourced their creativity? At that level your own imagination is precisely what I'm paying you for, what an L and an insult to admit you can't do it and charge me anyway. www.nytimes.com/2025/06/02/d...
Reposted by brandon
Properly celebrated IML 😜
May 26, 2025 at 3:38 PM
Properly celebrated IML 😜
The guy on the right wishes he could tell the guy on the left to be a little kinder to himself, to have patience, and to trust the process.
May 20, 2025 at 1:32 AM
The guy on the right wishes he could tell the guy on the left to be a little kinder to himself, to have patience, and to trust the process.