Aurumsella
@aurumsella.bsky.social
"Transporter room get us out of here now!!"
"Energize."
"Why is nothing happening?!!"
"There seems to be a slight #transport er...malfunction. Turns out we brought everything around you on board as well."
"Aaaaaaaaargh!!!"
"... Sorry about that. We'll return things back to the planet."
#vss365
"Energize."
"Why is nothing happening?!!"
"There seems to be a slight #transport er...malfunction. Turns out we brought everything around you on board as well."
"Aaaaaaaaargh!!!"
"... Sorry about that. We'll return things back to the planet."
#vss365
November 15, 2025 at 9:14 AM
"Transporter room get us out of here now!!"
"Energize."
"Why is nothing happening?!!"
"There seems to be a slight #transport er...malfunction. Turns out we brought everything around you on board as well."
"Aaaaaaaaargh!!!"
"... Sorry about that. We'll return things back to the planet."
#vss365
"Energize."
"Why is nothing happening?!!"
"There seems to be a slight #transport er...malfunction. Turns out we brought everything around you on board as well."
"Aaaaaaaaargh!!!"
"... Sorry about that. We'll return things back to the planet."
#vss365
"There's a #science to murder, U know."
"Is there?"
"Yes. There is."
"Have U studied it?"
"U know I don't like to study."
"I do know that. Which is why I'm wondering how come U are doing it, then, if it's a science."
"Well, besides experts, there's got to be hobbyists too, right?"
"I guess."
#vss365
"Is there?"
"Yes. There is."
"Have U studied it?"
"U know I don't like to study."
"I do know that. Which is why I'm wondering how come U are doing it, then, if it's a science."
"Well, besides experts, there's got to be hobbyists too, right?"
"I guess."
#vss365
November 14, 2025 at 10:31 PM
Reposted by Aurumsella
I think the girl at the airline's check-in counter just threatened me.
She looked me dead in the eye and said, “Window or aisle?”
I laughed in her face and replied, “Window or you’ll what?”
She looked me dead in the eye and said, “Window or aisle?”
I laughed in her face and replied, “Window or you’ll what?”
November 12, 2025 at 11:22 AM
I think the girl at the airline's check-in counter just threatened me.
She looked me dead in the eye and said, “Window or aisle?”
I laughed in her face and replied, “Window or you’ll what?”
She looked me dead in the eye and said, “Window or aisle?”
I laughed in her face and replied, “Window or you’ll what?”
"What's that?"
"It's an orchid #mantis."
"Is it? Aren’t they usually pink? Why is this one lavender?"
"You see it too! I'm so glad. It's not only the color, there's something else different too."
"You mean the antenna? It's curly?"
"Yes! It's a new species, isn't it? I found a new species."
#whistpr
"It's an orchid #mantis."
"Is it? Aren’t they usually pink? Why is this one lavender?"
"You see it too! I'm so glad. It's not only the color, there's something else different too."
"You mean the antenna? It's curly?"
"Yes! It's a new species, isn't it? I found a new species."
#whistpr
November 12, 2025 at 11:47 AM
"Help me out a little, will you?"
"Sure. What do you need?"
"Measure some #myth for me, & add it in the mix I'm making."
"Ok. How much do you need?"
"I don't know. The recipe doesn't have measures. I'm guessing. Trying to eyeball it."
"No need for a measure then. I'll just pour it in."
#vss365
"Sure. What do you need?"
"Measure some #myth for me, & add it in the mix I'm making."
"Ok. How much do you need?"
"I don't know. The recipe doesn't have measures. I'm guessing. Trying to eyeball it."
"No need for a measure then. I'll just pour it in."
#vss365
November 12, 2025 at 9:33 AM
"Good morning. How's the weather looking today?"
"There's a #slight chance of occasional #literature occurring."
"Oh. Could we #shape that into a certainty, perhaps?"
"You know weather. It is what it is, and does what it does. Doesn't ask our opinion."
"True. True. Well, here's hoping."
👍
#vss365
"There's a #slight chance of occasional #literature occurring."
"Oh. Could we #shape that into a certainty, perhaps?"
"You know weather. It is what it is, and does what it does. Doesn't ask our opinion."
"True. True. Well, here's hoping."
👍
#vss365
November 10, 2025 at 10:58 AM
"Good morning. How's the weather looking today?"
"There's a #slight chance of occasional #literature occurring."
"Oh. Could we #shape that into a certainty, perhaps?"
"You know weather. It is what it is, and does what it does. Doesn't ask our opinion."
"True. True. Well, here's hoping."
👍
#vss365
"There's a #slight chance of occasional #literature occurring."
"Oh. Could we #shape that into a certainty, perhaps?"
"You know weather. It is what it is, and does what it does. Doesn't ask our opinion."
"True. True. Well, here's hoping."
👍
#vss365
We're snailposting. Post your snails!
November 9, 2025 at 10:04 PM
We're snailposting. Post your snails!
"You gotta do it. It's the #law."
"Show me where in the law book it says I have to carry ice cream in my back pocket on Sundays."
"It's right here. See!"
"Oh...So it is. Who the heck came up with this, and why??!"
"It's the whole country. We just want to be the opposite of that other place."
#vss365
"Show me where in the law book it says I have to carry ice cream in my back pocket on Sundays."
"It's right here. See!"
"Oh...So it is. Who the heck came up with this, and why??!"
"It's the whole country. We just want to be the opposite of that other place."
#vss365
November 9, 2025 at 8:38 AM
Reposted by Aurumsella
🧵Out Now! Tiny Moments of Joy: Spotted on Market Day in Aotearoa New Zealand
It's officially live!
Today's the launch day for Tiny Moments of Joy and we couldn't be happier to share the news with you.
You can get your copy here:
www.swashbucklerpress.com/tiny-moments...
(1)
It's officially live!
Today's the launch day for Tiny Moments of Joy and we couldn't be happier to share the news with you.
You can get your copy here:
www.swashbucklerpress.com/tiny-moments...
(1)
November 9, 2025 at 7:30 AM
🧵Out Now! Tiny Moments of Joy: Spotted on Market Day in Aotearoa New Zealand
It's officially live!
Today's the launch day for Tiny Moments of Joy and we couldn't be happier to share the news with you.
You can get your copy here:
www.swashbucklerpress.com/tiny-moments...
(1)
It's officially live!
Today's the launch day for Tiny Moments of Joy and we couldn't be happier to share the news with you.
You can get your copy here:
www.swashbucklerpress.com/tiny-moments...
(1)
"Blok. Glonk. Giitoyrp brralk."
"Haha. Striiiistrg."
"What #language are you two talking??"
"Our mother tongue."
"Go back where you came from!!"
"Would love to. Unfortunately it was infested by humans & is uninhabitable now."
"Oh... I'm so sorry. I didn't know. Make yourselves at home here."
#vss365
"Haha. Striiiistrg."
"What #language are you two talking??"
"Our mother tongue."
"Go back where you came from!!"
"Would love to. Unfortunately it was infested by humans & is uninhabitable now."
"Oh... I'm so sorry. I didn't know. Make yourselves at home here."
#vss365
November 8, 2025 at 11:07 AM
"Oh, no..."
"You know the guy just walked in?"
"Yeah... We've got some #history."
"He looks dreamy."
"He's a nightmare."
"I don't know... Might be worth a try anyway."
"Trust me. You don't want that drama in your life."
"Been boring lately. I'll give him a whirl."
"...Your funeral."
#vss365
"You know the guy just walked in?"
"Yeah... We've got some #history."
"He looks dreamy."
"He's a nightmare."
"I don't know... Might be worth a try anyway."
"Trust me. You don't want that drama in your life."
"Been boring lately. I'll give him a whirl."
"...Your funeral."
#vss365
November 7, 2025 at 8:50 AM
"It's a nightmare."
"What is?"
"This test we're having at school."
"What's it on?"
"You don't know? It's #geography!"
"Oh. ...Oh! You mean a literal nightmare! I passed geography 10 years ago!"
"No. You did not. You failed it. Now you are taking it again."
#vss365
"What is?"
"This test we're having at school."
"What's it on?"
"You don't know? It's #geography!"
"Oh. ...Oh! You mean a literal nightmare! I passed geography 10 years ago!"
"No. You did not. You failed it. Now you are taking it again."
#vss365
November 6, 2025 at 1:05 PM
"It's a nightmare."
"What is?"
"This test we're having at school."
"What's it on?"
"You don't know? It's #geography!"
"Oh. ...Oh! You mean a literal nightmare! I passed geography 10 years ago!"
"No. You did not. You failed it. Now you are taking it again."
#vss365
"What is?"
"This test we're having at school."
"What's it on?"
"You don't know? It's #geography!"
"Oh. ...Oh! You mean a literal nightmare! I passed geography 10 years ago!"
"No. You did not. You failed it. Now you are taking it again."
#vss365
"Hey! Hey! Wait up! You got a minute?!"
"Nope. Late for my appointment at the #Minute #Prison to proofread the minutes of our last meeting."
"Huh??"
#2WordPrompt
"Nope. Late for my appointment at the #Minute #Prison to proofread the minutes of our last meeting."
"Huh??"
#2WordPrompt
November 5, 2025 at 11:04 AM
"Hey! Hey! Wait up! You got a minute?!"
"Nope. Late for my appointment at the #Minute #Prison to proofread the minutes of our last meeting."
"Huh??"
#2WordPrompt
"Nope. Late for my appointment at the #Minute #Prison to proofread the minutes of our last meeting."
"Huh??"
#2WordPrompt
"What are you wearing?"
"Remember how last year people complained puffy winter coats 'Hide the feminine form'?"
"Yeah?"
"This year's winter fashion makes sure everyone knows underneath the warmth, there's still b oobs & curves."
"By... printing b oobs on the coat???"
"This is all the rage now."
#vss
"Remember how last year people complained puffy winter coats 'Hide the feminine form'?"
"Yeah?"
"This year's winter fashion makes sure everyone knows underneath the warmth, there's still b oobs & curves."
"By... printing b oobs on the coat???"
"This is all the rage now."
#vss
November 4, 2025 at 11:31 AM
"What are you wearing?"
"Remember how last year people complained puffy winter coats 'Hide the feminine form'?"
"Yeah?"
"This year's winter fashion makes sure everyone knows underneath the warmth, there's still b oobs & curves."
"By... printing b oobs on the coat???"
"This is all the rage now."
#vss
"Remember how last year people complained puffy winter coats 'Hide the feminine form'?"
"Yeah?"
"This year's winter fashion makes sure everyone knows underneath the warmth, there's still b oobs & curves."
"By... printing b oobs on the coat???"
"This is all the rage now."
#vss
Reposted by Aurumsella
Crimetober 1-31 COMPLETE SET 🧵
Because birds are criminals.
#crimetober 1-9
#birds #art #animals #birdart
Because birds are criminals.
#crimetober 1-9
#birds #art #animals #birdart
November 2, 2025 at 5:33 PM
Crimetober 1-31 COMPLETE SET 🧵
Because birds are criminals.
#crimetober 1-9
#birds #art #animals #birdart
Because birds are criminals.
#crimetober 1-9
#birds #art #animals #birdart
"Who is that #creature standing next to our grandson?"
"That would be his wife."
"What??! When did he get married, & why was I not informed?!"
"You were. 10 years ago."
"This is unacceptable."
"So you said 10 years ago."
"He should marry a human being!"
"He made his choice. They are happy."
#vss365
"That would be his wife."
"What??! When did he get married, & why was I not informed?!"
"You were. 10 years ago."
"This is unacceptable."
"So you said 10 years ago."
"He should marry a human being!"
"He made his choice. They are happy."
#vss365
November 2, 2025 at 12:08 PM
"Happy #Halloween, my love," she says in a message on my answering machine.
'Happy?'
How could a man be happy with his wife gone missing with all his assets and his mistress?
#vss365
'Happy?'
How could a man be happy with his wife gone missing with all his assets and his mistress?
#vss365
October 31, 2025 at 7:35 AM
"Happy #Halloween, my love," she says in a message on my answering machine.
'Happy?'
How could a man be happy with his wife gone missing with all his assets and his mistress?
#vss365
'Happy?'
How could a man be happy with his wife gone missing with all his assets and his mistress?
#vss365
"The #Purple Witch got a bee in her bonnet, or a wasp. It startled her so she fell from the sky into a bramble, & by the time she finally untangled herself from it, scratched bloody all over, some stupid thief had stolen her broom! She's not in a good mood, I tell ya."
"She wears a bonnet?"
#whistpr
"She wears a bonnet?"
#whistpr
October 30, 2025 at 5:31 PM
"Whatcha doing?"
"Paying our twice #monthly #legal fees."
"Say what? We have legal fees??"
"Yep."
"Why???"
"Because YOU keep getting us sued."
#2WordPrompt
"Paying our twice #monthly #legal fees."
"Say what? We have legal fees??"
"Yep."
"Why???"
"Because YOU keep getting us sued."
#2WordPrompt
October 30, 2025 at 4:56 PM
"Whatcha doing?"
"Paying our twice #monthly #legal fees."
"Say what? We have legal fees??"
"Yep."
"Why???"
"Because YOU keep getting us sued."
#2WordPrompt
"Paying our twice #monthly #legal fees."
"Say what? We have legal fees??"
"Yep."
"Why???"
"Because YOU keep getting us sued."
#2WordPrompt
"What's that on that tray?"
"A #ray gun."
"It looks like a tiny person!"
"Yeah. Like I said."
"I've never seen a ray gun move like that. ...Or a person."
"Oh... One word, not two. It's a Raygun. Though it will shoot lasers from its feet when it's upside down."
"Dafuqq??"
#vss365
"A #ray gun."
"It looks like a tiny person!"
"Yeah. Like I said."
"I've never seen a ray gun move like that. ...Or a person."
"Oh... One word, not two. It's a Raygun. Though it will shoot lasers from its feet when it's upside down."
"Dafuqq??"
#vss365
October 30, 2025 at 11:45 AM