A pair of mismatched Mary Jane’s
@ashamedtosay.bsky.social
Expat Oregonian living in Chicago.
Pinned
You aren’t owed my attention just because you want it.
They’ve issued a Fire Weather Watch in Chicago in February. The climate is fine! Nothing to see here! It’s all going according to plan….
a man in a suit and tie is petting a white kitten
Alt: Blofeld, seen from shoulders down in a suit and tie is petting a white kitten. He’s a Bond villain. The white kittens looks content.
media.tenor.com
February 17, 2026 at 10:37 PM
They’ve issued a Fire Weather Watch in Chicago in February. The climate is fine! Nothing to see here! It’s all going according to plan….
The only thing better than Flavor Flav at the Summer Olympics is Flavor Flav at the Winter Olympics.
February 17, 2026 at 12:44 PM
The only thing better than Flavor Flav at the Summer Olympics is Flavor Flav at the Winter Olympics.
You know it’s been a hard winter when it’s 36° and having the back door open seems like a great plan. I am going outside in short sleeves, might go running in a tank top.
February 15, 2026 at 2:18 PM
You know it’s been a hard winter when it’s 36° and having the back door open seems like a great plan. I am going outside in short sleeves, might go running in a tank top.
With the snow finally melting after three months, the backyard is like that Star Trek epsisode, the trouble with tribbles, only instead of cute fluffy balls of fur; it’s poop.
February 14, 2026 at 2:26 PM
With the snow finally melting after three months, the backyard is like that Star Trek epsisode, the trouble with tribbles, only instead of cute fluffy balls of fur; it’s poop.
When the Washington Post says Democrats stopped DHS funding like that’s bad, Chuck Schumer should go on national television and say “You are goddamned right.”
February 14, 2026 at 12:33 PM
When the Washington Post says Democrats stopped DHS funding like that’s bad, Chuck Schumer should go on national television and say “You are goddamned right.”
I still can’t believe that a PR tour from a former co-host of MTV’s Singled Out is the reason why I have to get a MMR vaccine booster because of measles outbreaks in the year of our lord 2026.
February 12, 2026 at 9:19 PM
I still can’t believe that a PR tour from a former co-host of MTV’s Singled Out is the reason why I have to get a MMR vaccine booster because of measles outbreaks in the year of our lord 2026.
Can someone please explain to me why Michael Kors is using a table saw recklessly in my dream last night? He was about to saw his thumbs off.
February 10, 2026 at 3:45 PM
Can someone please explain to me why Michael Kors is using a table saw recklessly in my dream last night? He was about to saw his thumbs off.
I think main reason not to use AI for researching and writing things is that it ends up reading like the unhinged screeds of narcissistic pedophile MAGA POTUS Grandpa.
February 10, 2026 at 12:17 PM
I think main reason not to use AI for researching and writing things is that it ends up reading like the unhinged screeds of narcissistic pedophile MAGA POTUS Grandpa.
This morning I said to my therapist, a white dude, “What is wrong with men?” and he said “Detailing what’s wrong with men could fill a library.”
February 6, 2026 at 4:40 PM
This morning I said to my therapist, a white dude, “What is wrong with men?” and he said “Detailing what’s wrong with men could fill a library.”
The backyard has become a giant dog litter box where the snow is litter and I don’t want to tell you how much snow poo I just shoveled. The unit of measurement being a 5 gallon bucket from Lowe’s.
February 5, 2026 at 10:22 PM
The backyard has become a giant dog litter box where the snow is litter and I don’t want to tell you how much snow poo I just shoveled. The unit of measurement being a 5 gallon bucket from Lowe’s.
If Democracy dies in Darkness, then pay attention to who (Jeff Bezos) made it dark.
February 4, 2026 at 8:18 PM
If Democracy dies in Darkness, then pay attention to who (Jeff Bezos) made it dark.
I am looking for a chalet-style mansion that was designed to repel others, has a series of rooms for each family members special interests, and others that provide space to make bed nests in parts of the house based on season - including pets. No. Entertaining.
The chalet-style mansion in Dunthorpe has wine cellar that stores more than 2,500 bottles.
Eye-catching Willamette River mansion designed for entertaining listed at $3.8M. See inside
The chalet-style mansion in Dunthorpe has wine cellar that stores more than 2,500 bottles.
www.oregonlive.com
February 4, 2026 at 1:07 AM
I am looking for a chalet-style mansion that was designed to repel others, has a series of rooms for each family members special interests, and others that provide space to make bed nests in parts of the house based on season - including pets. No. Entertaining.
The kids are alright.
February 3, 2026 at 5:16 PM
The kids are alright.
Cossacks. Well… Cossacks and the Tsar, as Grandma told it. My Dad’s people are Volga German and both sides migrated around 1905-1913 to Portland and Nebraska, respectively. They were tired of their villages being raided, attempts at Russification and fuck being conscripted into the Tsar’s army.
Genuinely curious: If your family is American, what brought them here?
Mine: religious nuttery & primogeniture
Mine: religious nuttery & primogeniture
February 3, 2026 at 12:31 PM
Cossacks. Well… Cossacks and the Tsar, as Grandma told it. My Dad’s people are Volga German and both sides migrated around 1905-1913 to Portland and Nebraska, respectively. They were tired of their villages being raided, attempts at Russification and fuck being conscripted into the Tsar’s army.
Think of all the stuff you don’t need that you’d just end up with from Target. Now think about all the stuff you do need that you used to buy at Target, and now spend that money somewhere else that’s also not Home Depot or Amazon.
Do you know who else should be think about that? Fucking Target. 🎯
Do you know who else should be think about that? Fucking Target. 🎯
February 2, 2026 at 8:57 PM
Think of all the stuff you don’t need that you’d just end up with from Target. Now think about all the stuff you do need that you used to buy at Target, and now spend that money somewhere else that’s also not Home Depot or Amazon.
Do you know who else should be think about that? Fucking Target. 🎯
Do you know who else should be think about that? Fucking Target. 🎯
CBS doesn’t have news. It used to have news, but it doesn’t anymore.
a man in a suit and tie is sitting in a chair with his hands in the air
Alt: President Obama in a suit and tie is sitting in a chair with his hands in the air as if to say duh, obviously
media.tenor.com
January 31, 2026 at 3:25 PM
CBS doesn’t have news. It used to have news, but it doesn’t anymore.
If this is “not what you voted for” then now is the time to call your Congressional representatives and State Houses. It’s not sports, you aren’t locked into agreeing with every single thing the party you are affiliated with does - they work for you.
January 30, 2026 at 3:19 PM
If this is “not what you voted for” then now is the time to call your Congressional representatives and State Houses. It’s not sports, you aren’t locked into agreeing with every single thing the party you are affiliated with does - they work for you.
ARE YOU NOT OUTRAGED?!?! Give us a dollar 🫴 is not a strategy, it’s a grift.
January 29, 2026 at 8:06 PM
ARE YOU NOT OUTRAGED?!?! Give us a dollar 🫴 is not a strategy, it’s a grift.
Am I to understand that 2016 was TEN YEARS AGO? I would have guessed three or four.
January 29, 2026 at 6:13 PM
Am I to understand that 2016 was TEN YEARS AGO? I would have guessed three or four.
Kristi Noem out here acting like she’s some dummy with Miller’s hand up her ass making her mouth move like she doesn’t have agency and power herself is as devoid of personal responsibility as you’d expect from the GOP.
Kristi Noem: "Everything I've done, I've done at the direction of the president and Stephen"
January 28, 2026 at 10:07 PM
Kristi Noem out here acting like she’s some dummy with Miller’s hand up her ass making her mouth move like she doesn’t have agency and power herself is as devoid of personal responsibility as you’d expect from the GOP.
If what ICE and CBP are legal and moral, why do they wear masks? Why do they conceal the identities of their agents and those agents who have taken lives? If they truly are law enforcement- they shouldn’t hide. But they do is both illegal and immoral so they wear masks.
January 28, 2026 at 6:11 PM
If what ICE and CBP are legal and moral, why do they wear masks? Why do they conceal the identities of their agents and those agents who have taken lives? If they truly are law enforcement- they shouldn’t hide. But they do is both illegal and immoral so they wear masks.
Reposted by A pair of mismatched Mary Jane’s
Not sure if anyone that follows lives in my area but my Mother in-law is missing since Sunday. Left from San Diego to Yuma and never made it. Last cell ping was Jacumba right before a pretty nasty grade. Anything helps at this point.
January 28, 2026 at 4:51 AM
Not sure if anyone that follows lives in my area but my Mother in-law is missing since Sunday. Left from San Diego to Yuma and never made it. Last cell ping was Jacumba right before a pretty nasty grade. Anything helps at this point.
What with your CBS News and your .aol email address and your Netscape browser - what ever will you do? Page me or send me a fax when you decide.
January 27, 2026 at 6:11 PM
What with your CBS News and your .aol email address and your Netscape browser - what ever will you do? Page me or send me a fax when you decide.
Who the fuck even watches broadcast news? My Mom? That’s it and only barely half paying attention. Mostly not, by the stories she tells.
January 27, 2026 at 6:09 PM
Who the fuck even watches broadcast news? My Mom? That’s it and only barely half paying attention. Mostly not, by the stories she tells.
I do not wish to receive another fundraising text from a Democrat not in my state and district that begins “my decision” - my guy/gal/pal, go get ‘em, but I’ve been burned by this party one too many Fettermans to throw dollars at politicians instead of towards mutual aid here in Chicago.
January 27, 2026 at 5:05 PM
I do not wish to receive another fundraising text from a Democrat not in my state and district that begins “my decision” - my guy/gal/pal, go get ‘em, but I’ve been burned by this party one too many Fettermans to throw dollars at politicians instead of towards mutual aid here in Chicago.