formerly Ape Descendant
@apeascends.bsky.social
In my own place, in my own Time
Pinned
New platform; New me.
I will not:
* post my madness
* damage my employability
* whinge, bitch, moan about irl people who want the best for me
* seek validation through thirst traps
* fall in limerence (again)
So it's all cat pics from here on in, folks
I will not:
* post my madness
* damage my employability
* whinge, bitch, moan about irl people who want the best for me
* seek validation through thirst traps
* fall in limerence (again)
So it's all cat pics from here on in, folks
There's still time.
Wait a bit.
Wait a bit.
February 10, 2026 at 10:47 AM
There's still time.
Wait a bit.
Wait a bit.
It's back on.
They think it was successful. More to come...
I should release a public statement soon.
They think it was successful. More to come...
I should release a public statement soon.
February 10, 2026 at 10:45 AM
It's back on.
They think it was successful. More to come...
I should release a public statement soon.
They think it was successful. More to come...
I should release a public statement soon.
Oh.
So not because I cut my thumb off with a table saw then.
Carry on.
😘
So not because I cut my thumb off with a table saw then.
Carry on.
😘
February 10, 2026 at 10:37 AM
Oh.
So not because I cut my thumb off with a table saw then.
Carry on.
😘
So not because I cut my thumb off with a table saw then.
Carry on.
😘
Say hi to her for me
February 10, 2026 at 10:19 AM
Say hi to her for me
Fuck you!
You know what I'm going through right now! (Right?)
(Pretty funny gag though, Poo-pathetic. 😅)
You know what I'm going through right now! (Right?)
(Pretty funny gag though, Poo-pathetic. 😅)
February 10, 2026 at 10:17 AM
Fuck you!
You know what I'm going through right now! (Right?)
(Pretty funny gag though, Poo-pathetic. 😅)
You know what I'm going through right now! (Right?)
(Pretty funny gag though, Poo-pathetic. 😅)
(Unrelated, but also check out the Dutch Golden Girls.)
February 10, 2026 at 8:11 AM
(Unrelated, but also check out the Dutch Golden Girls.)
February 10, 2026 at 5:19 AM
All good.
New Dressing Day so that's *something to do*
🎆🎇🎆
New Dressing Day so that's *something to do*
🎆🎇🎆
February 9, 2026 at 9:37 PM
All good.
New Dressing Day so that's *something to do*
🎆🎇🎆
New Dressing Day so that's *something to do*
🎆🎇🎆
I'm having a clean out.
First thing to go are people who I pour my heart out to & who give a single word, comic response.
I no longer need them.
First thing to go are people who I pour my heart out to & who give a single word, comic response.
I no longer need them.
February 9, 2026 at 12:55 PM
I'm having a clean out.
First thing to go are people who I pour my heart out to & who give a single word, comic response.
I no longer need them.
First thing to go are people who I pour my heart out to & who give a single word, comic response.
I no longer need them.
Are you offering to buy some for me, or buy some from me?
February 9, 2026 at 10:33 AM
Are you offering to buy some for me, or buy some from me?
Just a flesh wound.
They reattached my thumb so it's a waiting game to see if it takes.
Circular saw.
They reattached my thumb so it's a waiting game to see if it takes.
Circular saw.
February 9, 2026 at 8:30 AM
Just a flesh wound.
They reattached my thumb so it's a waiting game to see if it takes.
Circular saw.
They reattached my thumb so it's a waiting game to see if it takes.
Circular saw.
Same!
There are two of them?!
There are two of them?!
February 9, 2026 at 8:28 AM
Same!
There are two of them?!
There are two of them?!
I've seen stuff, James. Bad stuff.
February 9, 2026 at 6:08 AM
I've seen stuff, James. Bad stuff.
I'm sorry Jimmy, I don't want to learn any new words.
February 9, 2026 at 4:31 AM
I'm sorry Jimmy, I don't want to learn any new words.
A Proof of Life Post:
I'm laying here, just vibing.
Thinking I must be the absolute luckiest man in the world.
I'm laying here, just vibing.
Thinking I must be the absolute luckiest man in the world.
February 7, 2026 at 10:13 PM
A Proof of Life Post:
I'm laying here, just vibing.
Thinking I must be the absolute luckiest man in the world.
I'm laying here, just vibing.
Thinking I must be the absolute luckiest man in the world.
The jock in question is so scummy, so baggy, so beyond the fit-for-purpose-ness that it was originally made that an image does not bear sending.
February 4, 2026 at 7:54 AM
The jock in question is so scummy, so baggy, so beyond the fit-for-purpose-ness that it was originally made that an image does not bear sending.
I've tried it since, but alas, it is less than perfect.
😪
😪
February 4, 2026 at 7:52 AM
I've tried it since, but alas, it is less than perfect.
😪
😪
It's not evening yet.
Could I please at least rail you first?
Could I please at least rail you first?
February 4, 2026 at 5:38 AM
It's not evening yet.
Could I please at least rail you first?
Could I please at least rail you first?
A jockstrap & apron is perfect cooking attire.
February 4, 2026 at 5:04 AM
A jockstrap & apron is perfect cooking attire.
Now let's see you try to lick your bum
February 3, 2026 at 6:36 AM
Now let's see you try to lick your bum
My pillows are no longer as firm as they were even two years ago
February 3, 2026 at 12:22 AM
My pillows are no longer as firm as they were even two years ago
What's a resi?
February 3, 2026 at 12:19 AM
What's a resi?
Do you deliver?
February 2, 2026 at 10:29 PM
Do you deliver?