alder
@alderfae.bsky.social
I like big books and I cannot lie, and also women.
If you enjoy my nonsense, check me out on Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/alderfae
If you enjoy my nonsense, check me out on Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/alderfae
Truly and thoroughly...I do not matter. I'm fucking worthless.
February 7, 2026 at 6:44 PM
Truly and thoroughly...I do not matter. I'm fucking worthless.
@marithecat.bsky.social I mean...it is the best flavor...at least tied evenly with salt and vinegar for me 😂
I'm convinced that a sign of getting old is how I keep buying new and fancy potato chip flavours, getting 1/3rd of the way through the bag and realizing I actually just want sour cream and onion.
February 6, 2026 at 6:45 PM
@marithecat.bsky.social I mean...it is the best flavor...at least tied evenly with salt and vinegar for me 😂
Istg every time I think about Girl Scout Cookies - Girl Scouts magically appear at the library.
Coincidence? I think not!
Coincidence? I think not!
February 6, 2026 at 6:36 PM
Istg every time I think about Girl Scout Cookies - Girl Scouts magically appear at the library.
Coincidence? I think not!
Coincidence? I think not!
Why are we getting more snow? I do believe we have enough here right now...I do not need more..I'm cancelling my subscription to winter kthxbyeeee
February 6, 2026 at 3:26 PM
Why are we getting more snow? I do believe we have enough here right now...I do not need more..I'm cancelling my subscription to winter kthxbyeeee
I was being big silly and asked Mari if she regrets moving in with me yet bc I'm a gremlin.
Mari: the only one who regrets moving here is you.
Me: I don't regret moving here!
Mari: walk outside in the snow and tell me you don't hate it right now.
She's not even wrong. Fuck all this snow 😂
Mari: the only one who regrets moving here is you.
Me: I don't regret moving here!
Mari: walk outside in the snow and tell me you don't hate it right now.
She's not even wrong. Fuck all this snow 😂
February 5, 2026 at 3:44 PM
I was being big silly and asked Mari if she regrets moving in with me yet bc I'm a gremlin.
Mari: the only one who regrets moving here is you.
Me: I don't regret moving here!
Mari: walk outside in the snow and tell me you don't hate it right now.
She's not even wrong. Fuck all this snow 😂
Mari: the only one who regrets moving here is you.
Me: I don't regret moving here!
Mari: walk outside in the snow and tell me you don't hate it right now.
She's not even wrong. Fuck all this snow 😂
Me to @bawxxy.bsky.social: holy shit the piles of snow are taller than me!
Nina: being taller than you isn't that impressive, but still :3
😂
Nina: being taller than you isn't that impressive, but still :3
😂
January 30, 2026 at 2:12 PM
Me to @bawxxy.bsky.social: holy shit the piles of snow are taller than me!
Nina: being taller than you isn't that impressive, but still :3
😂
Nina: being taller than you isn't that impressive, but still :3
😂
Every time I make fries I think about the Heinz ketchups that were different colors and I long for a simpler time when my main concern was how the fuck did they make ketchup green?
January 30, 2026 at 1:25 AM
Every time I make fries I think about the Heinz ketchups that were different colors and I long for a simpler time when my main concern was how the fuck did they make ketchup green?
Reposted by alder
If a muffin is basically a cupcake with fruit, then why isn't it a fruitcake?
This thought brought to you by my dumb brain and the muffin I bought for breakfast while walking to work.
This thought brought to you by my dumb brain and the muffin I bought for breakfast while walking to work.
January 23, 2026 at 1:53 PM
If a muffin is basically a cupcake with fruit, then why isn't it a fruitcake?
This thought brought to you by my dumb brain and the muffin I bought for breakfast while walking to work.
This thought brought to you by my dumb brain and the muffin I bought for breakfast while walking to work.
Just realized this will be the first year I haven't lived in Louisiana during Mardi Gras season....how...how do I get King Cake???
January 13, 2026 at 1:50 PM
Just realized this will be the first year I haven't lived in Louisiana during Mardi Gras season....how...how do I get King Cake???
Hopefully 2026 won't suck. Doubtful.
January 1, 2026 at 5:04 AM
Hopefully 2026 won't suck. Doubtful.
"It's a bike lane, not a scooter lane," says some kid riding the wrong way in the bike lane...while I'm also on my bike.
I just needed green onions from Giant, kid 😂
I just needed green onions from Giant, kid 😂
December 13, 2025 at 5:55 PM
"It's a bike lane, not a scooter lane," says some kid riding the wrong way in the bike lane...while I'm also on my bike.
I just needed green onions from Giant, kid 😂
I just needed green onions from Giant, kid 😂
Patron: I'm going to call the President since he hates Wes Moore and Baltimore. That will fix y'all.
What was the problem you may ask? The printer ran out of paper. Which...was promptly fixed.
What was the problem you may ask? The printer ran out of paper. Which...was promptly fixed.
December 12, 2025 at 6:24 PM
Patron: I'm going to call the President since he hates Wes Moore and Baltimore. That will fix y'all.
What was the problem you may ask? The printer ran out of paper. Which...was promptly fixed.
What was the problem you may ask? The printer ran out of paper. Which...was promptly fixed.
Nothing like the feeling of getting off your first bus at exactly the right time and having to wait a total of 10 seconds for the connecting bus to get to the stop
December 9, 2025 at 1:42 PM
Nothing like the feeling of getting off your first bus at exactly the right time and having to wait a total of 10 seconds for the connecting bus to get to the stop
Reposted by alder
I don't know why every app decided 2025 was the year they all needed to do their own version of Wrapped, but they need to read the goddamn room. The last thing I want to do is remember what happened this year.
December 8, 2025 at 12:55 AM
I don't know why every app decided 2025 was the year they all needed to do their own version of Wrapped, but they need to read the goddamn room. The last thing I want to do is remember what happened this year.
*cries in freezing in the East Coast* 😂
December farmers market haul.
I love living in California. ❤️
I love living in California. ❤️
December 8, 2025 at 1:50 AM
*cries in freezing in the East Coast* 😂
I'm the cute one who does nothing
every operation needs:
- the brains
- the brawn
- the cute one who does nothing
- the one who is counterproductive to the entire operation
- the brains
- the brawn
- the cute one who does nothing
- the one who is counterproductive to the entire operation
December 8, 2025 at 1:48 AM
I'm the cute one who does nothing
Reposted by alder
Is it depression or neurodivergent burnout?
More news at 11.
More news at 11.
December 8, 2025 at 1:47 AM
Is it depression or neurodivergent burnout?
More news at 11.
More news at 11.
Reposted by alder
Me, seven days deep into Christmas: I’m sorry but if you give me another partridge we’re gonna fight
My true love: *sweating*
My true love: *sweating*
December 7, 2025 at 7:20 PM
Me, seven days deep into Christmas: I’m sorry but if you give me another partridge we’re gonna fight
My true love: *sweating*
My true love: *sweating*
Another one lol.
Patron (on phone): where am I at in line for the hotspot?
Me: you're number 505
Patron: hmm...I'll give you $20 to move me up.
Me: I can't do that sir.
Patron: all right, $50.
NO
Patron (on phone): where am I at in line for the hotspot?
Me: you're number 505
Patron: hmm...I'll give you $20 to move me up.
Me: I can't do that sir.
Patron: all right, $50.
NO
December 6, 2025 at 7:22 PM
Another one lol.
Patron (on phone): where am I at in line for the hotspot?
Me: you're number 505
Patron: hmm...I'll give you $20 to move me up.
Me: I can't do that sir.
Patron: all right, $50.
NO
Patron (on phone): where am I at in line for the hotspot?
Me: you're number 505
Patron: hmm...I'll give you $20 to move me up.
Me: I can't do that sir.
Patron: all right, $50.
NO
I think I'm just gonna start a thread of crazy shit I've heard while on the job.
December 6, 2025 at 5:57 PM
I think I'm just gonna start a thread of crazy shit I've heard while on the job.
My brain: am sad, you know what we should do?
Me: rest and take care of ourselves?
Brain: If by that, you mean get more piercings, then yes.
It wasn't but...I meeeean >.>
Me: rest and take care of ourselves?
Brain: If by that, you mean get more piercings, then yes.
It wasn't but...I meeeean >.>
November 30, 2025 at 1:53 AM
My brain: am sad, you know what we should do?
Me: rest and take care of ourselves?
Brain: If by that, you mean get more piercings, then yes.
It wasn't but...I meeeean >.>
Me: rest and take care of ourselves?
Brain: If by that, you mean get more piercings, then yes.
It wasn't but...I meeeean >.>