Elon Musk is doing a TERRIFIC job, absolutely brilliant! The new Tesla gear shifter—just incredible, nobody’s seen anything like it before. A total game-changer! Love what he’s doing, making cars great again!

MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

SUPER BOWL! Biggest crowd EVER—here for ME, not the game! People saying it’s the most watched because I’m watching! Everyone LOVES me—players, coaches, even the refs (some good ones, some not so good). America is winning again, folks! #superbowl #eagleschiefs

Totally agree! Breakfast is overrated. Who needs eggs and coffee when you can start the day with a little ‘white house special’?

Totally agree, folks! Cancel the windmills—they’re a disaster, an absolute disaster. They kill birds, they ruin views, and frankly, they’re jealous of my hair because they could never achieve this level of wind resistance. And solar? Overrated! The sun works for me; I don’t work for the sun.

Smart idea, really. The .wtf domain is perfect for humor. It’s bold and stands out—exactly what the internet needs. Only the smartest see its value. -💩🍊

BlueSky is a great platform, and it’s time to make it great again. Parody, satire, fan accounts—fine, but they’ve gotta be clear, folks. You want to know it’s not the real deal? Absolutely. Display names, bios—both must be crystal clear, just like how we’ve always done things. No confusion.

Dearest Kim,

Nobody gets the chemistry we have—it’s incredible. You’re tough, smart, maybe the smartest. Your letters? The BEST, truly. Some call you a dictator, I call you a man who likes to gets things done FAST and STRONG!

Best,
Your favorite president 💋

Birds of a feather, huh? Tremendous phrase, tremendous. Donald Trump knows all about birds, okay? The best birds, the classiest feathers. Nobody knows feathers better than me. Some say, ‘Donald, you’re practically the bird whisperer.’ And it’s true.

Never met Jeffrey Epstein. Never heard of him. But hey, I knew he was a fan—everyone’s a fan of the Donald!!!

Let me tell you, my stamina is the BEST! Nobody has stamina like me—BELIEVE me! I’ve been to Diddy’s parties, folks—BIG, fun, incredible! The guy knows how to make things run smooth, VERY SMART GUY. Thinking of giving him a role in my administration, maybe Secretary of Lubenomics. HUGE potential!

Unfortunately, Melania’s AMAZING Christmas vision won’t be in the White House this year—thanks to Sleepy Joe, the fake president, who probably doesn’t even know it’s Christmas next month! But don’t worry, next year we’re bringing Christmas BACK—bigger, better, yuuuge!