And yes, I had to stop midway through to pee, because screaming like a moose requires pelvic floor strength that I sacrificed having giant headed spawn come out of my body.

you have no idea how fucking fun this is.
You dont have to be a perfect parent, but there are ways to turn your parents knee-jerk reactions of yelling at you, into something silly you do to get rid of negative emotions with your own kids.

Why the hell was I born a human? I have to pay taxes but I could be shitting on someone's car and eating worms.

Why the hell was I born a human? I have to pay taxes but I could be shitting on someone's car and eating worms.

They all seem to have the safety caps on, so I don't really see a big deal here. Birds are immune to drugs right?

How? Even with Rosetta or Duolingo, I can't seem to gain or retain a 2nd language.
Like genuinely, bilingual people are amazing. I stumble over my words in English and I've spoken it my whole life. 😭

I wish we could buy two of him. ✌️ more Alec is more better

COVID lingers in uncirculated air for two hours, but dies on surfaces pretty quick.

Measles hangs out ON SURFACES for two hours. Air? We don’t precisely know, but we can assume it’s longer.

This is the reason all your disabled friends were freaking out about RFK.

I'm going to point my laundry covered chair at my bed and make faces at it until some eldritch horror ends my existence for being a silly goose. 🤪