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vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
Monkey One
@vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
550 followers 260 following 4.1K posts
Livin’ the farce, baby!
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vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
Movie villain who is horrible (though not a person) but an absolute joy to watch?

And he only gets like 7 minutes on screen.
Peter Stormaire as Lucifer, a balding white middle-aged man in a white suit sitting in an office gym. He’s clapping his hands sarcastically and has a look like he’s patronizing you. Peter Stormaire as Lucifer getting really close to Keanu Reeves as Constantine and sticking his tongue partially out of his mouth while looking menacing. He has strange hexagonal marks on his temple and dark lines on his neck. Peter Stormaire’s Lucifer in profile smiling at Keanu Reeves’s Constantine. He has strange hexagonal marks on his temple and dark lines on his neck.
November 11, 2025 at 6:48 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
4HEAD KISSES FOR MY HOMIES in the style of a Zohran campaign sign
November 8, 2025 at 11:18 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
I am constantly being lied to.
Yellow low tire pressure light: an exclamation marks between two parentheses closed at the bottom by a solid line and a square dotted line below and connected to the solid line.
November 8, 2025 at 10:34 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
Holy shit.
Texas Senate District 9 results with 100% in: Taylor Rehmet (D) has 56,506 votes for 48% of the total. Leigh Wambsganss (R) has 42,712 for 36% John Huffman has 19,591 for 16%.
November 5, 2025 at 2:18 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
A classic two dogs one stick situation until they heard the truck.
November 4, 2025 at 11:31 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
Still can’t believe we got this meme in real life this year.
The meme with the guy with a huge chin putting his hand on someone else’s shoulder and smiling knowingly. There is another man in the background. A brunette guy in a green shirt doing the same pose and expression to a blond guy in a red shirt.
November 4, 2025 at 7:10 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
November 4, 2025 at 2:35 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
The evil faerie Trump made a deal with reminding him he still owes her 2,384 children’s souls.
An older lady with a pinched face and glasses wearing a black hat covering the back of her hair and a black outfit with a white shawl with black spots. She’s pointing at a paper Trump is holding with one hand while Trump, who seems to have his eyes closed, looks annoyed. They are in a crowded, gaudy dining room.
November 2, 2025 at 3:33 AM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
Impossible to explain to these people that Charlie Kirk was a nobody to most other people and they aren’t even thinking about him, let alone going out of their way to coordinate an official school Halloween photo all dressed as his corpse.
A tweet from Right Angle News Network reading: BREAKING - Vail School District in Tucson, Arizona is refusing to take action against members of its math department who wore “problem solved” shirts with fake blood running down the side in clear reference to Charlie Kirk, claiming the shirts referred to solving math problems. With a picture below it of the following picture in this skeet. The picture of five women and two men wearing shirts that say, “Problem Solved” with blood all over the left side of the shirt. On of the women also has fake injuries on her arm and face. Next to it is a length text post from the school explaining that this is their yearly costume, they’ve worn it before, and it has nothing to do with Charlie Kirk. The teachers all wearing the same outfit in a post from last year.
November 2, 2025 at 12:33 AM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
Tweet from Dr Naomi Wolf. There is a white check next to her name. Her own very fuzzy picture is her icon. The tweet reads, “No! No!!”
October 31, 2025 at 8:03 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
Some really good motivation in this week’s comics.
Absolute Batman, a beefy Batman with a fat bat sign on the chest, tattered cape, and spiked shoulders. He’s holding a flamethrower and surrounded by the burning remnants of a white supremacist cell with an eagle prominent at the top of the panel. The caption says, “What will you do?” Two comic panels. First panel: Thor stands facing away from the reader on a rock. He is wearing only a rough brown tunic. Lightning is flitting around him. He says, “It is winter now. And all I was is buried under the snow—all but one thing. There is wrong, Sigurd.” Second Panel: Thor is looking back over his shoulder at the reader. His eyes are partially closed. Lightning continues to flash around him. He says, “And where there is wrong…you break the sky to right it. For that is who you are.”
October 31, 2025 at 4:18 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
This is what it looks like, btw.
A golden crown with dangling white and green jade claws and round golden leaves. There are also two dangling gold chain earrings that end in arrowhead like points.
October 29, 2025 at 5:19 AM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
Guess what my wife found and brought home: something adorable that we definitely have no room for.
Two puppies that look kind of like corgi mixed with Burmese mountain dog lying opposite each other on a blue mat. The one on the left is mostly sandy colored with a black muzzle and white underside. The one on the right is mostly black and white with sandy colored cheeks and a black muzzle. There is a white stuffed rabbit next to them.
October 28, 2025 at 10:02 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
Countries never stop being a superpower because of internal dysfunction, right?
A white guy wearing a green shirt with gold writing with his hand on another white guy’s (red shirt) shoulder. His expression is one of pitying but amused doubt about what the person in red has said.
October 24, 2025 at 9:10 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
I couldn’t bring myself to try to break Seth’s records on the flea games, so it will probably always be 99%. I also have no idea what my actual time on the game is because I had a bad habit of sitting at benches and then doing other stuff without pausing.
Game completion screen for Silksong. GAME COMPLETION *decorative line* PERCENTAGE 99% TIME 134h 10m 33s *another decorative line*
October 23, 2025 at 9:04 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
No, white conservative guy who suspiciously retired young to live in Thailand, it’s not OK for you to use slurs, even if you REALLY want to.
Quote-tweet of Benny Johnson being obsequious from “Swann Marcus”: Tweets like this are why it was so dumb we weren’t allowed to call things “ret*rded” for a decade There is no other word sufficient to describe a tweet this stupid
October 21, 2025 at 3:53 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
Homer Simpson in a hammock with a beer on his stomach looking disinterested and saying, “Yeah, libertarians will do that.”
October 21, 2025 at 2:31 AM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
“That’s too mean.”

Well…
Old Scottish woman with short white hair in a green coat holding an umbrella. She’s about to say something awesome.
October 19, 2025 at 7:53 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
“Please, Mr. Sliwa, drop out so Mr. Cuomo only loses by 8 points instead of 21.”
Tweet from the execrable Eyal Yakoby: Sliwa has less than half the projected votes as Cuomo. Why won’t he drop out? A picture from Fox News of the projected votes showing Mamdani with 49%, Cuomo with 28%, and Sliwa with 13%. 28+13 is 41.
October 19, 2025 at 3:07 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
No one naps like a senior dog.
A black lab with a light green collar laying on a brown leather couch with a blanket partially under him. His tongue is sticking out.
October 17, 2025 at 7:44 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
Pretty sure Charlie Kirk isn’t working as a Horst Wessel for the modern Nazis, considering this is apparently near Asheville, NC.
A billboard honoring Charlie Kirk that has been vandalized. His face has been ripped off and his name sprayed over with white paint. The words “SMASH FASCISM STAND-UP…FIGHT BACK” are sprayed on the board in white paint.
October 17, 2025 at 3:29 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
Meme with buff Marx saying, “I’M JOINING THE WAR ON JOHN BOLTON ON THE SIDE OF I HOPE THEY DESTROY EACH OTHER”
October 16, 2025 at 9:54 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
Good news, everybody! The feijoa in my parents’ backyard have ripened!
A feijoa fruit on a green grid table with a deck, a Pomeranian, and part of a foot under it. The fruit is oval shaped and bright green with a small bunch of leaves coming off the end. The cut open feijoa on a tinkerbell plate. The inside is yellowish with a cross in the middle made of darker jelly.
October 2, 2025 at 5:03 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
The response in my head any time I hear someone I don’t care about complaining about something.
Homer Simpson in a hammock looking at a beer and smiling. The caption reads, “Yeah, they’ll do that.”
October 1, 2025 at 10:51 PM
vitruvianmonkey.bsky.social
Wisdom is a burden.
Skeet from the Helldude: is there any reasonable argument against just shutting down the government Reply from me: Potential opportunity for Trump to say ok I’m completely in charge of the money and laws now, don’t come back and if you do I will arrest you? Skeet from Jacob Bogage: *eyes looking sideways* Just Now — President Trump in the Oval Office said a government shutdown gives his administration the power to cut benefit programs, which include Social Security and Medicare. Followed by a quoted excerpt of Trump word salad.
September 30, 2025 at 5:38 PM