Loving people was never the problem, the problem was the people I chose to love. Love is only worth it in the right time, loving people when you aren't even loving yourself is poisonous to the soul. Not to mention the people you chose to love, people in this world are weird, my peers are so.. weird.

Looking back, this year has been an entire lesson from that night I nearly went to the other side, it's showing me what would've happen if I learned to let go; sometimes things are just not worth holding onto, lives with no proper purpose are nothing but distractions.

I feel a lot better now though, at least I am no longer in that type of relationship, there was nothing wrong, 'cause I would always forgive her, but I've reached my limit and I have to show up for myself this time, I have to be there for myself this time.

The day after that was worse, it felt so long that even thinking about it now I realized that it was just one afternoon... It's fucking nuts.. Almost killed myself over shit like that. Over a girl, a girl who wasn't even thankful for the things I did for her. It's like I don't even matter to her.

Its weird, it's like I wasn't ready for it, maybe I really am not ready for death like I always thought I was. That experience has made me appreciate myself a little bit everyday, thinking about what could've happen that night made me realize that I should be thankful for everything I have right now

my promises I still keep, your happiness is my only desire

hoping that whoever comes next will understand that at one time, someone loved you with all the love he could pour

We once shared love, now share glances

yet, you still look at me with the same eyes as the day you and I fell in-love

we have found our new lights, but I still cling into your flame

hoping that someday you would warm me with your touch, rather than scorch me with your wrath

so much things to do