jake
@valianes.com
former: esports legend, youtube sensation & bartending icon
current: washed up nobody.
current: washed up nobody.
new york once again proves its the only good city in america
November 5, 2025 at 4:26 AM
new york once again proves its the only good city in america
If you ever see a pair of adult twins together, there is a 96% chance they are plotting something devious
October 12, 2025 at 6:06 AM
If you ever see a pair of adult twins together, there is a 96% chance they are plotting something devious
Step 1: do laundry
Step 2: go eat ramen while waiting for laundry
Step 3: ruin shirt while eating ramen, creating more laundry
tantanmen @ akai kujira, akasaka
noodlesquad rise up
Step 2: go eat ramen while waiting for laundry
Step 3: ruin shirt while eating ramen, creating more laundry
tantanmen @ akai kujira, akasaka
noodlesquad rise up
October 9, 2025 at 7:14 AM
Step 1: do laundry
Step 2: go eat ramen while waiting for laundry
Step 3: ruin shirt while eating ramen, creating more laundry
tantanmen @ akai kujira, akasaka
noodlesquad rise up
Step 2: go eat ramen while waiting for laundry
Step 3: ruin shirt while eating ramen, creating more laundry
tantanmen @ akai kujira, akasaka
noodlesquad rise up
Hibernation over. Time to start living again
September 30, 2025 at 4:07 PM
Hibernation over. Time to start living again
Hello, I recorded a lot of fun videos last year and I’m almost done releasing them (1 more to go). I dont really like posting about them on social media because yuck, but I also feel obligated to because thats what a normal person would do. Also I worked hard on them and I think theyre pretty good 🙂
September 1, 2025 at 7:23 AM
Hello, I recorded a lot of fun videos last year and I’m almost done releasing them (1 more to go). I dont really like posting about them on social media because yuck, but I also feel obligated to because thats what a normal person would do. Also I worked hard on them and I think theyre pretty good 🙂
promote hadjar to the red bull and move yuki back to the vcarb (said without any ulterior motive whatsoever)
August 31, 2025 at 1:09 PM
promote hadjar to the red bull and move yuki back to the vcarb (said without any ulterior motive whatsoever)
just got my permanent retainer removed after 20 years
June 10, 2025 at 2:28 PM
just got my permanent retainer removed after 20 years
the american vice president killed the pope and then they elected an american pope
oh brother
oh brother
May 8, 2025 at 5:31 PM
the american vice president killed the pope and then they elected an american pope
oh brother
oh brother
Damn I picked a bad day to release a video about Rome
April 21, 2025 at 2:46 PM
Damn I picked a bad day to release a video about Rome
Ouch. SoFi is absolutely empty for the Nations League 3rd place game. Do Americans care about their team at all?
March 23, 2025 at 9:56 PM
Ouch. SoFi is absolutely empty for the Nations League 3rd place game. Do Americans care about their team at all?
the fact that xQc used to be top 500 at Overwatch is not surprising to me at all because he has absolutely 0 hand/eye coordination and the reaction time of a koala
March 8, 2025 at 5:23 PM
the fact that xQc used to be top 500 at Overwatch is not surprising to me at all because he has absolutely 0 hand/eye coordination and the reaction time of a koala
the internet was a mistake. im going outside
March 6, 2025 at 3:00 AM
the internet was a mistake. im going outside
hello, its me, an online celebrity
February 21, 2025 at 2:08 AM
hello, its me, an online celebrity
ok we definitely lost the national anthem battle.. what the fuck was that
February 21, 2025 at 1:24 AM
ok we definitely lost the national anthem battle.. what the fuck was that
this hockey game better be the closest to war we ever get
February 21, 2025 at 1:18 AM
this hockey game better be the closest to war we ever get
holy shit I missed international hockey. its been too damn long, there isn't much better. never heard montreal cheer so loud for a leaf goal
February 13, 2025 at 4:13 AM
holy shit I missed international hockey. its been too damn long, there isn't much better. never heard montreal cheer so loud for a leaf goal
february 1st, time to get wet
February 1, 2025 at 4:54 PM
february 1st, time to get wet
I Went To All The Best Bars In Madrid
YouTube video by jake valianes
youtu.be
January 29, 2025 at 4:28 PM
In an adult I’m allowed to stay up until 5am if I want, you’re not the boss of me
January 29, 2025 at 10:01 AM
In an adult I’m allowed to stay up until 5am if I want, you’re not the boss of me
if john turturro and christopher walken don’t make out in severance season 2, i’m never watching tv again
January 21, 2025 at 6:31 PM
if john turturro and christopher walken don’t make out in severance season 2, i’m never watching tv again
I Went To The NEW Best Bar In New York City
YouTube video by jake valianes
www.youtube.com
January 13, 2025 at 12:27 AM
spoon is the best utensil and it’s not even close. followed by knife and then fork. this is not up for debate
January 6, 2025 at 3:34 AM
spoon is the best utensil and it’s not even close. followed by knife and then fork. this is not up for debate