To use a quote from office space, why should we change when they're the ones who suck? It's easier to change the party than to invent a new one and gain traction.

I legitimately can't even make a joke about this.

I just don't get how so many people fell for his shit or are afraid of him.

I once brought too many snacks with me on a work trip and my coworkers had to wait as they swabbed each and every one because they thought they might be bombs.

Me reading this and laughing like Sam Neil at the end of In the Mouth of Madness

I legitimately did not bank on this many people being so incredibly stupid

Which passage in the Bible tells people to seek vengeance?

One of my best friend's sisters told me I'm racist because my wife is vegan. I've known her since she was 6 years old and she was friends with my wife. I don't even really understand her point to this day and just told her to enjoy her Internet points and blocked her. I don't have time for this shit

No, this will make me look like a muffin.

I already love hot dogs; you don't have to sell me on eating them.

The Philadelphia Snowballs

I can't believe torturing your significant other is bad, actually

Her personality disorder is "total dickhead"

I loved that game a ton.

The only thing I'm mean to when I'm high is a bag of chips.

Why the fuck is a pastor tryna hang pubes

Ludicrous that this is how I found out