Tollytb🇮🇪🇪🇺🇨🇦🇬🇧
@tollytb.bsky.social
Bacon Buttie munching decrepid ex rugby player, older than pyramids planning application.Oval balls are harder to juggle.
I can't believe my girlfriend thinks I invade her privacy.
Well, that's what she wrote in her diary.
🐢💨
Well, that's what she wrote in her diary.
🐢💨
November 24, 2025 at 8:40 AM
I can't believe my girlfriend thinks I invade her privacy.
Well, that's what she wrote in her diary.
🐢💨
Well, that's what she wrote in her diary.
🐢💨
Imagine the US changing from lbs to Kilograms overnight.
Not only would there be Mass confusion: they'd all believe they had lost weight.
🐢💨
Not only would there be Mass confusion: they'd all believe they had lost weight.
🐢💨
November 24, 2025 at 8:14 AM
Imagine the US changing from lbs to Kilograms overnight.
Not only would there be Mass confusion: they'd all believe they had lost weight.
🐢💨
Not only would there be Mass confusion: they'd all believe they had lost weight.
🐢💨
What do you get if you cross a Cow and an Octopus?
A stern rebuke from the University ethics board, and an immediate withdrawal of funding🙄
🐢💨
A stern rebuke from the University ethics board, and an immediate withdrawal of funding🙄
🐢💨
November 24, 2025 at 8:06 AM
What do you get if you cross a Cow and an Octopus?
A stern rebuke from the University ethics board, and an immediate withdrawal of funding🙄
🐢💨
A stern rebuke from the University ethics board, and an immediate withdrawal of funding🙄
🐢💨
Breaking:
There's been a serious fire at a scented candle factory.
Warning: De-Stressing scenes.
🐢💨
There's been a serious fire at a scented candle factory.
Warning: De-Stressing scenes.
🐢💨
November 23, 2025 at 9:43 AM
Breaking:
There's been a serious fire at a scented candle factory.
Warning: De-Stressing scenes.
🐢💨
There's been a serious fire at a scented candle factory.
Warning: De-Stressing scenes.
🐢💨
@bbclaurak will this morning be interrupting Zack Polanski and Heidi Alexander, while giving Mel Stride an easy ride, and not mentioning what a useless bin bag of faecal detritus Alexspaffclunge Johnson is, or the traitor Nathan Gill.
#LauraK
🐢💨
#LauraK
🐢💨
November 23, 2025 at 8:37 AM
@bbclaurak will this morning be interrupting Zack Polanski and Heidi Alexander, while giving Mel Stride an easy ride, and not mentioning what a useless bin bag of faecal detritus Alexspaffclunge Johnson is, or the traitor Nathan Gill.
#LauraK
🐢💨
#LauraK
🐢💨
I told my girlfriend an Hawaiian joke, but I'm not sure she liked it.
She just let out a low ha.
🐢💨
She just let out a low ha.
🐢💨
November 23, 2025 at 8:19 AM
I told my girlfriend an Hawaiian joke, but I'm not sure she liked it.
She just let out a low ha.
🐢💨
She just let out a low ha.
🐢💨
My proctologist is an Irishman.
Dr Perry O'Neum.
🐢💨
Dr Perry O'Neum.
🐢💨
November 23, 2025 at 8:06 AM
My proctologist is an Irishman.
Dr Perry O'Neum.
🐢💨
Dr Perry O'Neum.
🐢💨
I had new window coverings fitted yesterday by two lovely guys.
Curt n Rod.
🐢💨
Curt n Rod.
🐢💨
November 23, 2025 at 7:44 AM
I had new window coverings fitted yesterday by two lovely guys.
Curt n Rod.
🐢💨
Curt n Rod.
🐢💨
My neighbour just told me his wife is pregnant with their first child. I said, " I know you will make a great father, because I have a sixth sense about these things."
I see dad people.
🐢💨
I see dad people.
🐢💨
November 22, 2025 at 11:28 AM
My neighbour just told me his wife is pregnant with their first child. I said, " I know you will make a great father, because I have a sixth sense about these things."
I see dad people.
🐢💨
I see dad people.
🐢💨
Andrew Mountemall will be sitting at home today thinking, " I hope Johnson and Farage are sweating as much as I didn't. "
🐢💨
🐢💨
November 22, 2025 at 8:50 AM
Andrew Mountemall will be sitting at home today thinking, " I hope Johnson and Farage are sweating as much as I didn't. "
🐢💨
🐢💨
You there boy, has everyone stopped mentioning Nathan Gill yet?
🐢💨
🐢💨
November 22, 2025 at 8:33 AM
You there boy, has everyone stopped mentioning Nathan Gill yet?
🐢💨
🐢💨
You there boy, has Shitgibbon Johnson, or Herr Fuhrage mentioned anything about the covid enquiry, or Nathan Gill's treason yet?
🐢💨
🐢💨
November 22, 2025 at 8:32 AM
You there boy, has Shitgibbon Johnson, or Herr Fuhrage mentioned anything about the covid enquiry, or Nathan Gill's treason yet?
🐢💨
🐢💨
Told my neighbour that I'd give him free air guitar lessons.
No strings attached.
🐢💨
No strings attached.
🐢💨
November 22, 2025 at 8:12 AM
Told my neighbour that I'd give him free air guitar lessons.
No strings attached.
🐢💨
No strings attached.
🐢💨
🎶Nathan Gill you'll be gone so long🎶
Lyrics by Reformorama
🐢💨
Lyrics by Reformorama
🐢💨
November 22, 2025 at 8:10 AM
🎶Nathan Gill you'll be gone so long🎶
Lyrics by Reformorama
🐢💨
Lyrics by Reformorama
🐢💨
I hear treason is a membership prerequisite for Reform now Nigel.
🐢💨
🐢💨
November 22, 2025 at 8:04 AM
I hear treason is a membership prerequisite for Reform now Nigel.
🐢💨
🐢💨
Frosty the snowman only pulls his pants down when the snow blower is due.
🐢💨
🐢💨
November 22, 2025 at 7:55 AM
Frosty the snowman only pulls his pants down when the snow blower is due.
🐢💨
🐢💨
Squeaky bum time for some individuals.
🐢💨
🐢💨
November 21, 2025 at 8:53 PM
Squeaky bum time for some individuals.
🐢💨
🐢💨
I wore my inspirational trainers to an event I hosted this morning.
They're motivational sneakers.
🐢💨
They're motivational sneakers.
🐢💨
November 21, 2025 at 2:54 PM
I wore my inspirational trainers to an event I hosted this morning.
They're motivational sneakers.
🐢💨
They're motivational sneakers.
🐢💨
My girlfriend just asked, " Why are you balancing a lemon on a pear?"
"Oh, your halfway there."
🐢💨
"Oh, your halfway there."
🐢💨
November 21, 2025 at 10:43 AM
My girlfriend just asked, " Why are you balancing a lemon on a pear?"
"Oh, your halfway there."
🐢💨
"Oh, your halfway there."
🐢💨
My new hide and seek club isn't going too well.
Good players are hard to find.
🐢💨
Good players are hard to find.
🐢💨
November 21, 2025 at 9:36 AM
My new hide and seek club isn't going too well.
Good players are hard to find.
🐢💨
Good players are hard to find.
🐢💨
Breaking:
New TV drama about colonoscopies deemed to be a total shit show.
🐢💨
New TV drama about colonoscopies deemed to be a total shit show.
🐢💨
November 21, 2025 at 9:31 AM
Breaking:
New TV drama about colonoscopies deemed to be a total shit show.
🐢💨
New TV drama about colonoscopies deemed to be a total shit show.
🐢💨
