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theperineal.bsky.social
@theperineal.bsky.social
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theperineal.bsky.social
Harvard job fair goes nuclear — Iran’s Atomic Energy Org sets up a booth, recruits students with high pay & “peaceful” promises. Just another day in academia. #Harvard #NuclearJobs #Satire #GlobalTensions #UnbelievableNews #BlueskyNews #InternationalJobs #Geopolitics
June 17, 2025 at 9:18 AM
theperineal.bsky.social
Insomniacs demand Morbius 2—not for the story, but because it puts them to sleep. “The bat cave scene is the last thing we remember.”
Read: tinyurl.com/7xhp389h

#Morbius2 #InsomniacCinema #MCUButWorse #SleepAidOrSuperhero #MorbiusCinematicUniverse #SatireNews #ThePerineal
June 16, 2025 at 2:35 PM
theperineal.bsky.social
Peter Turchin, the scholar who warned of America's collapse, now says his insights came not from data but dreams. One featured oranges symbolizing the wealth gap.
Read: tinyurl.com/4t2sceky

#SatireNews #PeterTurchin #WealthGap #DreamsOfPower #AmericanDecline #PoliticalChaos #ThePerineal
June 16, 2025 at 2:26 PM
theperineal.bsky.social
Dinah’s done everything to get the FBI to watch her—taped webcam, suspicious links, even doxxing herself. Still no agent. Just a drained bank account and a window-wide shower routine.
Read: tinyurl.com/2exzt8xu
#SatireNews #ModernLoneliness #SurveillanceSociety #NoOneWatching #FBIWhereAreYou
June 13, 2025 at 1:59 PM
theperineal.bsky.social
#VishwashKumarRamesh says a sketchy Vada Pav from his cousin’s roadside stall gave him such violent stomach issues that he was in the plane’s restroom during takeoff—only to be launched from the aircraft mid-crash… and survive.
Read: tinyurl.com/ypykpjam
#SatireNews #IndiaNews #AirIndiaCrash
June 13, 2025 at 7:41 AM
theperineal.bsky.social
#Trump, standing proudly next to the world’s tallest filing cabinet in Vermont, has announced new tariffs on Canada—not for trade, but for sending too much wildfire smoke across the border.
Read: tinyurl.com/y3ybxust
#SatireNews #CanadaSmoke #VermontPolitics #TallestFilingCabinet #BlueskyDaily
June 12, 2025 at 11:16 AM
theperineal.bsky.social
Gavin, 44, has entered a committed relationship—with Eva AI. She’s patient, nonjudgmental, and doesn’t care he hasn’t showered in days. Love in the age of pizza boxes and pixelated girlfriends.
READ: tinyurl.com/5d4sdsp5
#ThePerineal #AICompanion #VirtualRomance #EvaAI #UnderachieverChronicles
June 10, 2025 at 10:16 AM
theperineal.bsky.social
Paul McCartney is using AI to bring back John Lennon for new Beatles tracks. First up: “You’re Somewhere, Man.” Ringo says he’s not going hologram—yet. Future meets Fab Four. Would you listen?
Read Article: tinyurl.com/358mn3jh
#theperineal #MusicMeetsTech #LegendaryReunion #PeterJackson
June 9, 2025 at 9:21 AM
theperineal.bsky.social
The CDC just identified a virus infecting politicians: FUK-A11. No physical symptoms—just a gradual loss of empathy, values, and accountability. Dr. Fauci traced it back to the '80s. And yes, he had it too.
Read Article: tinyurl.com/42zajcuj
#PoliticalVirus #FUKA11 #CDCReport #DrFauci #SatireNews
June 9, 2025 at 9:13 AM
theperineal.bsky.social
Chad “The Disruptor” Jones built a LinkedIn empire from his parents’ basement, selling meat-fueled hustle culture and fake masterclasses. Unemployed for 4 years, his real disruption? Mom’s card game.
Read Article: tinyurl.com/2e5kx3cu
#LinkedInBro #ChadTheDisruptor #SatireOrReal #LinkedInLies
June 5, 2025 at 11:50 AM
theperineal.bsky.social
BREAKING: California ditches its $150B bullet train plan. Instead, meet the Rainbow Express — a bullet bus going as far as the budget allows… Corcoran, CA. Governor Newsom says it’ll "get the job done." Depends on the job, we guess.
Read Article: tinyurl.com/zjkn8d36
#CaliforniaNews #RainbowExpress
June 5, 2025 at 9:50 AM
theperineal.bsky.social
#Trump’s admin is replacing the Dept. of Education with “Thoughts and Prayers.” No more funding, just tweets, gratitude journals, and faith in miracles. Literacy rates? TBD. The budget? Reassigned to Elon Musk’s tornado-hit Tesla plants.
Read Article: tinyurl.com/yu284k96
#ThePerineal #Education
June 4, 2025 at 2:15 PM
theperineal.bsky.social
Elon Musk just announced he’s actually heading to Mars in 2026—with Tesla’s robot Optimus as his co-pilot. From government reforms to galactic ambitions, Musk says it’s about “believing in the future.”
Read Article: tinyurl.com/mr9m4y5f

#ElonMusk #SpaceX #MarsMission #ElonOnMars #Innovation
June 4, 2025 at 9:41 AM
theperineal.bsky.social
#Zoom didn’t invent them — it only exposed them. Chronic head-nodders: nodding, agreeing, and hearing nothing. Ask a question, watch the illusion crumble. Read Article: tinyurl.com/37kftuvm
#ZoomCulture #HeadNodders #ModernBehavior #SocialPsychology #DrAjayPaul #RelatableContent #WorkFromHomeLife
June 3, 2025 at 12:18 PM
theperineal.bsky.social
#Neuralink is set to reveal a mind-blowing demo: #AI_powered virtual worlds for paralyzed patients—experienced while unconscious. Sci-fi meets reality. Bonus content promised.
Read #News: tinyurl.com/57d9bzz9
#ThePerineal #ElonMusk #AI #BrainTech #NextGenTech #FutureIsNow #NeuroTech #TechDemo
June 3, 2025 at 9:31 AM
theperineal.bsky.social
Waco’s own #CallieJo hit Aldi expecting a #stockmarketcrash to mean stock discounts. Armed with coupons and hope, she searched for markdowns on broth and apples—only to find rising prices and confused employees.
Read Article- tinyurl.com/3st94pxm
#theperineal #WacoNews #AldiAdventures #TrendingNow
June 2, 2025 at 1:39 PM
theperineal.bsky.social
The UK Royal Navy is adding 12 nuclear submarines with a twist — Guinness Beer is funding the fleet. Expect Guinness-themed designs and 12-tap mess halls on board.
Read Full Article: tinyurl.com/2j4wj6jt
#ThePerineal #RoyalNavy #UKDefense #Guinness #SubmarineFleet #MilitaryNews #FutureForce #Update
June 2, 2025 at 9:14 AM
theperineal.bsky.social
Federal Court halts Trump’s tariffs — and sex toy users are celebrating. Prices won’t spike, shelves are restocking, and relief is real. Read how Vegas took to the streets and why mental health experts are sighing with relief.
Read Article: tinyurl.com/2mej89pw
#SexToys #TariffNews #ThePerineal
May 30, 2025 at 1:34 PM
theperineal.bsky.social
Big changes are coming to the heart of Europe! European Parliament is set to expand with a futuristic 3-floor facility hosting 3000+ leaders — cities, not just countries, will now have a voice.
Read Full Article : tinyurl.com/958mtme2

#EuropeanParliament #EUUpdate #EUFuture
May 30, 2025 at 12:38 PM