Emily
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themerriest.bsky.social
Emily
@themerriest.bsky.social
140 followers 200 following 740 posts
Aspiring starving poet. Weird mom. Oversharing on the internet since 1999. She/her. Let's be pen pals: https://overshare.beehiiv.com
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themerriest.bsky.social
how do you do, fellow kids?
A photograph of a produce bin at a grocery store full of wintery pale tomatoes. On the side is something more oblong of almost the exact same color, kissed with green on the bottom—a bell pepper in disguise.
November 16, 2025 at 1:20 AM
themerriest.bsky.social
You thought spooky season was over? Well this haunted carrot that just came out of Clem’s backpack would like to have a word.
A rough oval cut out of orange construction paper with heavy marker lines and two huge—like huge—black pool eyes. Attached to the fridge with a Super Potato magnet and a daisy magnet.
November 10, 2025 at 3:39 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
A marriage in four texts:
From me to Logan: “[gif of the guy that like...the little dancing twink that plays Superman talking to Hank Azaria but not it's the guy that was in the Pieta by that YBA, omg, Tony Stark, saying I don't feel so good and turning into dust]” “You’ll never believe it but I couldn’t find the gif.” From Logan to me: “Hahahaha” “[gif from Avengers Infinity War of Tom Holland saying, “I don’t feel so good,” to Robert Downey Jr.]”
November 6, 2025 at 4:41 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
Goal-setting app said TRANS RIGHTS.
Screenshot of a goal from the Finch app: 9 a.m. / Clear off patio / Productivity. The auto-assigned emoji is a purple icon with the white trans symbol. (A combination of the female symbol, the male symbol, and the androgynous symbol.)
November 5, 2025 at 4:45 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
John C. Reilly in a white button down and a blue striped suit vest with electric blue lightning shooting from his neck and hands in the video for Jack White’s “Archbishop Harold Holmes,” directed by Gilbert Trejo.
November 1, 2025 at 7:58 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
oh my god, the bitch is back

(Yes I did name my purple iPhone after the character in Jawbreaker.)
October 29, 2025 at 4:38 AM
themerriest.bsky.social
A four-word horror story for parents.
A screenshot of a box of SuperPretzel brand Soft Pretzels. The box is bright yellow with abstract wavy black shapes in two of the corners. Three photorealistic soft pretzels dotted with salt crystals are laid out in a row line the middle of the box, one with a big bite out of it. A zoom into the same screenshot of soft pretzels. In bold red text, it says, "NEW RECIPE, SAME TWIST."
October 19, 2025 at 7:12 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
October 15, 2025 at 3:42 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
Sometimes I swear they’re posing.
An orange teardrop shaped leaf at a jaunty angle centered on top of a black strip of repaired asphalt in a parking lot.
October 11, 2025 at 4:25 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
Post you from a different era. (2005)
A younger me wearing a jean jacket and a high school ring, holding two packets of Sweet and Lo and emptying them into a large iced tea with a lemon on the rim, sitting in a booth in the smoking section (!) at House of Pies in Houston.
October 9, 2025 at 2:34 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
Look at her, she’s perfect. My mom used to use the lighter to burn off the plastic tags from things when she didn’t have scissors.
Screenshot of an eBay item: a wide ashtray drawer with a sort of hinge at the back and a round press-in coil lighter with an icon of a cigarette. The item title reads: “MAZDA PROTEGE 97 1997 NON SMOKER DASH ASHTRAY & UNUSED LIGHTER.”
September 26, 2025 at 2:24 AM
themerriest.bsky.social
without downloading any new pics, where are u at, mentally
Screenshot of Josh Thomas on the panel of season 2 of Taskmaster Australia smiling and saying, “Oh, babe you don’t know what it’s like out there.”
September 21, 2025 at 5:15 AM
themerriest.bsky.social
Make that 1. ❤️
September 19, 2025 at 3:52 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
Can’t believe y’all are out here making Mummy Pig have another baby.
A square-cropped photo of a toy Mummy Pig and Peppa Pig in shrink wrap. Mummy has a pink baby sling with a sleeping baby pig with eyelashes and a yellow bow between her ears. The packaging reads, “Includes Baby Evie.” It’s $16.99 for the family set because we’re at the bookstore. haha
September 14, 2025 at 11:44 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
Look down.
A photograph of a fiery orange three-pointed leaf with a matching orange stem sitting in brown dirt with small bits of green grass poking through at the top and bottom of the frame. Photograph of a sidewalk. There’s a rectangular plate on the left of the frame with the letters LT and a bolt. Someone has drawn a cartoon of a tiny white spaceship with a bubble lid and a cat inside. On the side of the sidewalk is a stylized tag in a reddish brown paint that reads “KSUTRA.”
September 14, 2025 at 3:41 AM
themerriest.bsky.social
Florence still making music for the feral girlies inside of us.
Screenshot of “Everybody Scream” music video. An aerial shot of a wooden stage surrounded by rocks and moss. A red figure is at the center and four figures in black surround it. Lyrics at the bottom of the screen read: “the harvest, the needle…” “…protect me from evil.” Same shot from the “Everybody Scream music video.
September 9, 2025 at 5:52 AM
themerriest.bsky.social
Objectively the funniest song to listen to while crying in the parking lot of a trampoline park.
Screenshot of YouTube Music app. Album art of Linda Ronstadt’s Greatest Hits which is her in a cropped peasant top and a high waisted pair of jeans absolutely serving to the camera. Yes I can still do alt text while I’m crying, I’m an ally.
September 1, 2025 at 5:18 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
The Finch app is amazing, I just found out that all my goals give me extra rewards when I log a below-average mood. What good design. 🥹
Square-cropped screenshot of the Finch app. A blue bird is wearing a pair of purple sunglasses, a teal and orange bathing suit with a yellow sun on it, and a pair of yellow sandals. A pink blob with a darker pink face and eyes is standing next to the bird. The bedroom is decorated with blue carpet, a blue dresser, an orange door with a round window, a light blue nest, orange retro wallpaper, and framed photos of a bird and a flower on the wall.
August 22, 2025 at 7:14 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
www.justatad.xyz/p/the-celebr...
Screenshot of an article in Instapaper: “The celebrity crush is a beautiful thing. One of the great joys in life. Real crushes are terrible, anxiety-inducing, often heartbreaking affairs. Celebrity crushes, though, exist as pure, intangible fantasy. There are no stakes. Nothing is ever going to happen. It’s just simple attraction and mild (or sometimes not so mild) obsession.”
August 3, 2025 at 5:16 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
Incredible moment watching COLUMBUS (2017).
Photograph of a television with a canopy of trees on it. One of the trunks extends down to the bottom of the frame and the line is picked up perfectly by a black power cord of the same width.
July 26, 2025 at 7:52 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
Monday vibes. (Extra lossy.)
A doll head with a pouf of blonde hair on asphalt.
July 14, 2025 at 7:23 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
“Oh, him? Ugh. Yeah, he’s a real—”
Photograph of some curly greenery in a planter. A chalkboard label reads: “Corkscrew Junkus.”
July 7, 2025 at 10:10 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
Made a guy at the park.
Photograph looking down on a well-loved brown park bench. The suggestion of a face has been made with a bouquet of dead, curly fern leaves for hair; two grey oval pebbles for eyes; a bright green leaf for a nose that meets the stems of the fern leaves in the center of the face; a round dark green leaf mouth; and two earrings made from white round berries still on their stems.
June 26, 2025 at 1:55 AM
themerriest.bsky.social
If anyone needs me, I’ll be at the park making ballerinas out of stuff on the ground.
Yellow leaf on a blue foam playground covering. On the leaf is a ballerina made out of a red berry head, two pine needle arms, a fluffy moss skirt, and two berry stem legs.
June 22, 2025 at 6:10 PM
themerriest.bsky.social
From “I Sing the Body Electric.”
Be not ashamed women, your privilege encloses the rest, and is the exit of the rest, You are the gates of the body, and you are the gates of the soul. The female contains all qualities and tempers them, She is in her place and moves with perfect balance, She is all things duly veil'd, she is both passive and active, She is to conceive daughters as well as sons, and sons as well as daughters.
June 19, 2025 at 11:43 PM