There was a 3.3 ‘quake in Kendal this morning. Multiple wheelie bins toppled. A cup of tea rippled. One cat startled. We will rebuild.

I’ve had reactions to men before. It’s less “butterflies in my stomach” and more “my throat’s literally closing up”.

What’s this. So I’m literally allergic to ghosts now. Brilliant. Can’t wait to explain to A&E that I’m having an anaphylactic reaction to vibes.

The hygienist had Christmas fm on this morning while cleaning my teeth. Made that scene in Marathon Man look like a spa day. “Is it safe?” “No. It’s Bublé”.

This is Reform’s BBC - they’ve destroyed everything except Mrs Brown’s Boys and Call The Midwife because cruelty is the point.

Exactly. ‘For the greater good’ is just moral cowardice with better PR. If they’ll sacrifice some members to keep the lights on, who’s next when the wind changes? Principles aren’t principles if they’re negotiable.

Side note: I’ve been to Cobb’s - I get about as you know, and can’t enjoy any holiday without a trip to a comedy club. The worst I’ve experienced though was the Comedy Cellar in Greenwich Village. Drink mins, really aggressive security, not particularly gentlemanly clientele. I was SOO disappointed.

Quite. I think it has less to do with cod psychology and more to do with pure greed though. Perhaps if more men were taught the basics of how to sit on a chair without sprawling into neighbouring seats, that might help matters.