FLARPY THE DEATH-SKIPPER
@the-kreeture.bsky.social
Hug me dammit
December 25, 2025 at 4:47 PM
‘Twas the night before Christmas and @schumer.senate.gov can go fuck himself I’m too fucking tired to make up a rhyme
December 25, 2025 at 7:22 AM
‘Twas the night before Christmas and @schumer.senate.gov can go fuck himself I’m too fucking tired to make up a rhyme
It’s Christmas Eve and @schumer.senate.gov should step down 🎄
December 24, 2025 at 7:21 PM
It’s Christmas Eve and @schumer.senate.gov should step down 🎄
Hey @schumer.senate.gov step down already
December 23, 2025 at 9:46 PM
Hey @schumer.senate.gov step down already
The least you could do @schumer.senate.gov is tell me to suck your balls. Then again you‘d need balls.
December 23, 2025 at 1:31 AM
The least you could do @schumer.senate.gov is tell me to suck your balls. Then again you‘d need balls.
Pam Bondi should step down. @schumer.senate.gov should step down too. I KNOW YOU’RE THERE CHUCK!
December 23, 2025 at 1:28 AM
Pam Bondi should step down. @schumer.senate.gov should step down too. I KNOW YOU’RE THERE CHUCK!
Today is Winter Solstice which means the days will get longer and brighter unlike @schumer.senate.gov poll numbers
December 21, 2025 at 10:55 PM
Today is Winter Solstice which means the days will get longer and brighter unlike @schumer.senate.gov poll numbers
Andrew Tate is trending but who knows maybe just this once it won’t involve anything disgusting
December 21, 2025 at 2:07 AM
Andrew Tate is trending but who knows maybe just this once it won’t involve anything disgusting
Hey @schumer.senate.gov just letting you know I will keep doing this until the inevitable day the celestial alignments break the Conjuration of Undeath and you crumble into mummy dust returning to the netherworld from whence thee came. Or when you step down. Your call.
December 20, 2025 at 10:29 PM
Hey @schumer.senate.gov just letting you know I will keep doing this until the inevitable day the celestial alignments break the Conjuration of Undeath and you crumble into mummy dust returning to the netherworld from whence thee came. Or when you step down. Your call.
Reposted by FLARPY THE DEATH-SKIPPER
Community Does Jack Shit To Make Christmas Better For Town’s Second-Poorest Family
Community Does Jack Shit To Make Christmas Better For Town’s Second-Poorest Family
WAYNE, NE—After coming together and pooling resources to save Christmas for the town’s most impoverished family, a tight-knit Nebraska community reportedly did jack shit this week to make the holiday ...
theonion.com
December 20, 2025 at 12:00 AM
Community Does Jack Shit To Make Christmas Better For Town’s Second-Poorest Family
Hey @schumer.senate.gov if you’re in the Epstein files you should step down and if you’re not in the Epstein files you should step down anyway
December 20, 2025 at 1:01 AM
Hey @schumer.senate.gov if you’re in the Epstein files you should step down and if you’re not in the Epstein files you should step down anyway
Every day should be Chuck Schumer Should Step Down Day which is a holiday I made up but aren’t most of them? Anyway @schumer.senate.gov should step down
December 18, 2025 at 10:34 PM
Every day should be Chuck Schumer Should Step Down Day which is a holiday I made up but aren’t most of them? Anyway @schumer.senate.gov should step down
Lost count of Hanukkah days but @schumer.senate.gov should still step down
December 17, 2025 at 6:00 PM
Lost count of Hanukkah days but @schumer.senate.gov should still step down
Happy 3rd day of Hanukkah @schumer.senate.gov fucking step down
December 16, 2025 at 11:59 PM
Happy 3rd day of Hanukkah @schumer.senate.gov fucking step down
Happy 2nd day of Hanukkah @schumer.senate.gov please step down
December 16, 2025 at 5:59 AM
Happy 2nd day of Hanukkah @schumer.senate.gov please step down
Happy Hanukkah @schumer.senate.gov now step down
December 15, 2025 at 3:49 AM
Happy Hanukkah @schumer.senate.gov now step down
Hey @schumer.senate.gov you should probably start thinking about stepping down. You actually should’ve started thinking that months ago if not years. Better late than never.
December 13, 2025 at 10:43 PM
Hey @schumer.senate.gov you should probably start thinking about stepping down. You actually should’ve started thinking that months ago if not years. Better late than never.
I’m (kinda) sure @schumer.senate.gov isn’t in any photos with Epstein. He should step down anyway.
December 13, 2025 at 12:58 AM
I’m (kinda) sure @schumer.senate.gov isn’t in any photos with Epstein. He should step down anyway.
Hey @schumer.senate.gov I know you have a busy schedule fucking up everything but if you step down now you could focus more on fucking up your life instead of ours.
December 12, 2025 at 9:03 PM
Hey @schumer.senate.gov I know you have a busy schedule fucking up everything but if you step down now you could focus more on fucking up your life instead of ours.
Hey @schumer.senate.gov I ain’t done til you’re done so step the fuck down already and be done
December 12, 2025 at 3:13 AM
Hey @schumer.senate.gov I ain’t done til you’re done so step the fuck down already and be done
FIFA should make up an award for how much @schumer.senate.gov sucks at his job. Hell I’ll make up an award just for him to step down. I’ll call it the Fartswiggles Prize for Stepping the Fuck Down. Why Fartswiggles? Cause it’s my made-up award and I’ll call it whatever I goddamn feel like. 🏆
December 9, 2025 at 9:01 PM
FIFA should make up an award for how much @schumer.senate.gov sucks at his job. Hell I’ll make up an award just for him to step down. I’ll call it the Fartswiggles Prize for Stepping the Fuck Down. Why Fartswiggles? Cause it’s my made-up award and I’ll call it whatever I goddamn feel like. 🏆
STAND UP OR STEP DOWN @schumer.senate.gov
December 8, 2025 at 9:46 PM
STAND UP OR STEP DOWN @schumer.senate.gov
No I’ve been saying step down. That would’ve been embarrassing. Anyway @schumer.senate.gov should step down.
December 8, 2025 at 3:24 AM
No I’ve been saying step down. That would’ve been embarrassing. Anyway @schumer.senate.gov should step down.
Hey @schumer.senate.gov stand down. I mean step down. Shit have I been saying stand down all this time? Lemme check.
December 8, 2025 at 3:23 AM
Hey @schumer.senate.gov stand down. I mean step down. Shit have I been saying stand down all this time? Lemme check.
If @schumer.senate.gov worked at a Foot Locker he’d measured the customer‘s feet by cutting off their toes and shoving them up a cat’s butt with the intention to weigh the litter box later but completely forgets and wonders why the cat is walking weird.
December 6, 2025 at 9:21 PM
If @schumer.senate.gov worked at a Foot Locker he’d measured the customer‘s feet by cutting off their toes and shoving them up a cat’s butt with the intention to weigh the litter box later but completely forgets and wonders why the cat is walking weird.