My weirdest trait is that I listen to multi-hour replays of severe weather events as background noise.

I will not be taking questions at this time.

Been sitting here for two hours watching the sea breeze keep the storms solidly on the other side
of 17.

Weird to see flood advisories when we are still dry here. I wanna get some big booms. @jaredwsmith.com

My 3 year old regularly asks to see “pictures of storm clouds” and I’m extremely proud.

No one:

Absolutely no one:

Husband: Why is a Venti larger than Grande? Grande sounds so much bigger.

For all my fellow Olds

My 3 year old picked up a calculator and asked, “Where’s the tv screen?”

😅

I would like to bill my neighbors for the expensive anxiety meds I am needing to give my dog every night this week. Because they can’t just save their fireworks for the actual holiday and need to make a WEEK out of this.

Why not save all your explosives for the actual holiday? 😭

Navient: you owe us thousands for student loans

Me:

I’m only here because I think it would piss off Elon.