Samael
@soupcansam.bsky.social
My wretched thoughts shall be stored here
I'm currently taking 2d8 psychic damage q12h
October 8, 2025 at 1:47 AM
I'm currently taking 2d8 psychic damage q12h
RARE LEAKED PHOTO FROM INSIDE CASTLE RAVENLOFT
February 17, 2025 at 10:08 AM
RARE LEAKED PHOTO FROM INSIDE CASTLE RAVENLOFT
Me: I'm not going to make unhinged, hyperbolic political statements on social media. Those are inside thoughts and I just want escapism on the internet.
Also me: If you voted for Jill Stein you're a Nazi.
Also me: If you voted for Jill Stein you're a Nazi.
February 8, 2025 at 6:20 PM
Me: I'm not going to make unhinged, hyperbolic political statements on social media. Those are inside thoughts and I just want escapism on the internet.
Also me: If you voted for Jill Stein you're a Nazi.
Also me: If you voted for Jill Stein you're a Nazi.
We are holding children working for minimum wage to a higher standard of "decorum" than members of the United States House of Representatives.
February 8, 2025 at 6:15 PM
We are holding children working for minimum wage to a higher standard of "decorum" than members of the United States House of Representatives.
Bread & Work but this time it's Eggs & Work
February 6, 2025 at 7:50 PM
Bread & Work but this time it's Eggs & Work
Reposted by Samael
If you wanted to decrease the cost of homes, one thing you wouldn’t do is put a flat tariff on your main source of timber.
February 1, 2025 at 2:52 PM
If you wanted to decrease the cost of homes, one thing you wouldn’t do is put a flat tariff on your main source of timber.
Reposted by Samael
Mosquitos suck the blood right out of my body
Why don't they finish the job
Why don't they finish the job
January 18, 2025 at 1:06 AM
Mosquitos suck the blood right out of my body
Why don't they finish the job
Why don't they finish the job
Reposted by Samael
Molly reacts to Trump’s cabinet picks.
December 19, 2024 at 1:15 AM
Molly reacts to Trump’s cabinet picks.
Reposted by Samael
If you stopped at a deserted rest area to use the restroom and found it filled with turtles who all silently, balefully, turned their heads to look at you, how many turtles would it take to scare you off? That number is your Uncanny Rest-Area Restroom Turtle Number.
December 13, 2024 at 7:55 PM
If you stopped at a deserted rest area to use the restroom and found it filled with turtles who all silently, balefully, turned their heads to look at you, how many turtles would it take to scare you off? That number is your Uncanny Rest-Area Restroom Turtle Number.
"Criticism"
Facing criticism, Anthem Blue Cross Blue Shield said it will not proceed with a policy to put time limits on coverage for anesthesia during surgery.
Insurance company halts plan to put time limits on coverage for anesthesia during surgery | CNN
After sharp criticism from anesthesiologists, an insurance company is halting its plan to limit the amount time it would cover anesthesia used in surgeries and procedures. Anthem Blue Cross Blue Shiel...
www.cnn.com
December 6, 2024 at 6:20 PM
"Criticism"
Reposted by Samael
When we can avoid political discourse at the family gathering I prefer to spice it up by coming out of the bathroom and insulting the host's choice of which way to face the toilet paper
November 28, 2024 at 10:19 PM
When we can avoid political discourse at the family gathering I prefer to spice it up by coming out of the bathroom and insulting the host's choice of which way to face the toilet paper
Pictured: Donald Trump's newly appointed Surgeon General, Dr. Pimple Popper
November 25, 2024 at 9:31 PM
Pictured: Donald Trump's newly appointed Surgeon General, Dr. Pimple Popper
Are you ready for the McCarthian Red Scare that's sure to accompany your Thanksgiving?
They'll be asking if you saw something over on Ye Olde Twitter.
They'll be asking if you saw something over on Ye Olde Twitter.
November 25, 2024 at 4:08 PM
Are you ready for the McCarthian Red Scare that's sure to accompany your Thanksgiving?
They'll be asking if you saw something over on Ye Olde Twitter.
They'll be asking if you saw something over on Ye Olde Twitter.
Reposted by Samael
Fuck it, I say, as I dump the entire bag of pizza rolls on the baking sheet
November 25, 2024 at 4:11 AM
Fuck it, I say, as I dump the entire bag of pizza rolls on the baking sheet
Reposted by Samael
Gen Z is amazing. I asked a (paid) intern to bring me 50 blank pieces of copier paper and when she brought them in they were warm. Turns out that, rather than count them, she set the copier to 50 and printed blank sheets. Genius.
November 24, 2024 at 7:42 PM
Gen Z is amazing. I asked a (paid) intern to bring me 50 blank pieces of copier paper and when she brought them in they were warm. Turns out that, rather than count them, she set the copier to 50 and printed blank sheets. Genius.
Strahd V(o)n In(c)elovich
November 23, 2024 at 9:37 PM
Strahd V(o)n In(c)elovich
Curse of Strahd? More like Curse of Short King.
November 23, 2024 at 9:34 PM
Curse of Strahd? More like Curse of Short King.
A quote from my DM: "I'm sorry, I thought I was playing D&D not Desperate Housewives!"
That means we're winning at Dungeons and Dragons, right?
That means we're winning at Dungeons and Dragons, right?
November 23, 2024 at 9:32 PM
A quote from my DM: "I'm sorry, I thought I was playing D&D not Desperate Housewives!"
That means we're winning at Dungeons and Dragons, right?
That means we're winning at Dungeons and Dragons, right?
I don't believe in brand loyalty but something very American happens in me the second I see this stupid beaver
November 23, 2024 at 2:12 AM
I don't believe in brand loyalty but something very American happens in me the second I see this stupid beaver
Hi, I’m God.
Jesus said he wants you all to have free healthcare.
Love,
God
Jesus said he wants you all to have free healthcare.
Love,
God
November 23, 2024 at 1:03 AM
Trying to figure out what sports subscription I need to watch the games I want is psychological torture.
November 21, 2024 at 7:32 PM
Trying to figure out what sports subscription I need to watch the games I want is psychological torture.
I don't have pronouns. I mean that in the gay way, not the Republican way.
November 18, 2024 at 10:50 PM
I don't have pronouns. I mean that in the gay way, not the Republican way.
Reposted by Samael
"bluesky" would be a beautiful name for a cia operation in the cold war that destabilized a region and accidentally caused a resurgence of the bubonic plague
November 18, 2024 at 10:44 PM
"bluesky" would be a beautiful name for a cia operation in the cold war that destabilized a region and accidentally caused a resurgence of the bubonic plague