Sammy Petersen
@sammypetersen.bsky.social
Comedy man. Podcaster. Third thing.
Sorry I’m late. I could have easily been here earlier but I didn’t want to be.
November 18, 2025 at 10:46 AM
Sorry I’m late. I could have easily been here earlier but I didn’t want to be.
Feeling good! (Derogatory)
November 18, 2025 at 8:14 AM
Feeling good! (Derogatory)
This funeral could have been an email.
November 13, 2025 at 3:20 AM
This funeral could have been an email.
Oh sorry when I said the wine was ‘corked’
I was asking if you took a cork out and was impressed.
I was asking if you took a cork out and was impressed.
November 12, 2025 at 6:48 AM
Oh sorry when I said the wine was ‘corked’
I was asking if you took a cork out and was impressed.
I was asking if you took a cork out and was impressed.
Hey Alexa, tuck me in tonight.
November 9, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Hey Alexa, tuck me in tonight.
There’s no legal limit on how long you can soak a pot for
November 7, 2025 at 4:26 AM
There’s no legal limit on how long you can soak a pot for
You got time to clean, you got time to lean.
November 6, 2025 at 12:40 AM
You got time to clean, you got time to lean.
I mean a holster really is just a fancy gun purse.
November 2, 2025 at 12:53 AM
I mean a holster really is just a fancy gun purse.
I’m pretty hungry for someone who is constantly fed up.
October 31, 2025 at 12:14 AM
I’m pretty hungry for someone who is constantly fed up.
For Halloween this year I’m going as myself. It’s been a rough year.
October 29, 2025 at 2:20 AM
For Halloween this year I’m going as myself. It’s been a rough year.
Do I do cross words? Yeah, SHUT UP. They’re my cross words *leans back*
October 27, 2025 at 1:43 AM
Do I do cross words? Yeah, SHUT UP. They’re my cross words *leans back*
Imagine being a King but you find out it’s of Storage.
October 17, 2025 at 12:36 AM
Imagine being a King but you find out it’s of Storage.
Human Nature are like the Wiggles for boomers.
October 15, 2025 at 6:31 AM
Human Nature are like the Wiggles for boomers.
‘Finding Nemo’ is one of the greatest modern telling of an abduction I’ve ever seen.
October 13, 2025 at 9:44 AM
‘Finding Nemo’ is one of the greatest modern telling of an abduction I’ve ever seen.
I did the Melbourne marathon yesterday. Didn’t take as long in the car as I thought.
October 13, 2025 at 1:38 AM
I did the Melbourne marathon yesterday. Didn’t take as long in the car as I thought.
Not all heroes wear capes. For example: magicians.
October 9, 2025 at 9:07 AM
Not all heroes wear capes. For example: magicians.
More like daylight SPENDINGS
October 6, 2025 at 12:46 AM
More like daylight SPENDINGS
Slipping into something more comfortable (a coma)
October 5, 2025 at 12:23 AM
Slipping into something more comfortable (a coma)
I guess sprung has springed.
October 4, 2025 at 12:30 AM
I guess sprung has springed.
I’m filming my standup show next Friday in Melbourne! Why don’t you come along or share it with someone who might want to?
Tickets: www.comedyrepublic.com.au/event/38:519...
Tickets: www.comedyrepublic.com.au/event/38:519...
October 3, 2025 at 4:09 AM
I’m filming my standup show next Friday in Melbourne! Why don’t you come along or share it with someone who might want to?
Tickets: www.comedyrepublic.com.au/event/38:519...
Tickets: www.comedyrepublic.com.au/event/38:519...
At this point I’m considering my gym membership more of a charity donation.
October 2, 2025 at 12:09 AM
At this point I’m considering my gym membership more of a charity donation.
I’m not catholic but I carry out guilt like I am.
September 29, 2025 at 11:17 PM
I’m not catholic but I carry out guilt like I am.
I get up early every day to warn the worms about the birds.
September 28, 2025 at 3:16 AM
I get up early every day to warn the worms about the birds.
“Can you multitask?” Yes I am currently not doing over 30 things I really should be.
September 23, 2025 at 9:23 AM
“Can you multitask?” Yes I am currently not doing over 30 things I really should be.
