robbwitmer
@robbwitmer.info
The guy who jumped through the wedding cake in the Guns n’ Roses “November Rain” music video
► robbwitmer.info
► robbwitmer.info
they’ll still want to hire you at Nano Banana Amateur wages
November 26, 2025 at 4:10 AM
they’ll still want to hire you at Nano Banana Amateur wages
he died as he lived, grunting
just heard the tragic news about Hulk Hogan and no matter what you think of him, nobody should have to die by tripping face-first into a wood chipper and have their remains cooked on a flattop grill and then served as part of a weekday Philly cheesesteak lunch special at Mar-a-lago. sad
November 26, 2025 at 2:37 AM
he died as he lived, grunting
I am a man filled to the brim with Luck, it is coming out my eyes I have so much — but the Luck, it is Bad
November 26, 2025 at 1:59 AM
I am a man filled to the brim with Luck, it is coming out my eyes I have so much — but the Luck, it is Bad
oh god there’s a whole chapter on Russian dressing
November 25, 2025 at 11:43 PM
oh god there’s a whole chapter on Russian dressing
It’s mostly for the turkey sandwiches the next day, which is one of the Rules. Of Slaw. Actually now that I’m reading it the whole thing comes off as more of a manifesto than a set of rules and now I’m really curious why Robert Mueller wrote this
November 25, 2025 at 11:26 PM
It’s mostly for the turkey sandwiches the next day, which is one of the Rules. Of Slaw. Actually now that I’m reading it the whole thing comes off as more of a manifesto than a set of rules and now I’m really curious why Robert Mueller wrote this
I’m pretty sure Florida is the only state that qualifies as a tri-state area all by itself
November 25, 2025 at 11:14 PM
I’m pretty sure Florida is the only state that qualifies as a tri-state area all by itself
The president: not responsible for anything he says
Democrats: responsible for everything everybody says
Democrats: responsible for everything everybody says
November 21, 2025 at 6:47 PM
The president: not responsible for anything he says
Democrats: responsible for everything everybody says
Democrats: responsible for everything everybody says
looking forward to the McSoy Milkshakes and Tempeh Big Macs rollout in about six months
November 20, 2025 at 10:30 PM
looking forward to the McSoy Milkshakes and Tempeh Big Macs rollout in about six months
if reporters aren't going to ask Trump any questions about all the crimes that he's doing, the least they could do at the next press conference is ask him to explain the NFL kickoff rules in detail
November 20, 2025 at 10:21 PM
if reporters aren't going to ask Trump any questions about all the crimes that he's doing, the least they could do at the next press conference is ask him to explain the NFL kickoff rules in detail
they’re trying to hide the truth from you. these are real text messages, they’re going sperm-crazy
November 19, 2025 at 10:31 PM
they’re trying to hide the truth from you. these are real text messages, they’re going sperm-crazy
sperm guys declare sperm crisis after listening to podcasts about sperm and reading substacks about sperm and then thinking about sperm for a long time
November 19, 2025 at 6:54 PM
sperm guys declare sperm crisis after listening to podcasts about sperm and reading substacks about sperm and then thinking about sperm for a long time