Ryan Hitchcock
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rjhitch.bsky.social
Ryan Hitchcock
@rjhitch.bsky.social
420 followers 1.1K following 150 posts
Jus a lil guy
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rjhitch.bsky.social
Screengrab from The Simpsons: a close-up on Homer Simpson’s hand holding a candy tin, the label of which reads “NUTS AND GUM.” A little splash sticker on the label reads “Together at last!”
November 30, 2025 at 10:50 PM
rjhitch.bsky.social
excuse me??
A baffling title graphic from a video posted on the official Jeopardy YouTube page featuring Alex Trebek against a background of swirled peanut butter and shelled peanuts next to big all-caps block letters reading “THESE NUTS UNCUT”
November 10, 2025 at 7:56 PM
rjhitch.bsky.social
(And Cuomo)
Meme made from a screengrab from WWE. Wrestler AJ Styles grins happily, failing to notice the glowering, ominously backlit form of The Undertaker looming behind him. AJ Styles is labeled “Republican Candidates in 2025.” The Undertaker is labeled “Woke 2.”
November 5, 2025 at 2:56 AM
rjhitch.bsky.social
October 20, 2025 at 3:29 AM
rjhitch.bsky.social
September 1, 2025 at 5:34 PM
rjhitch.bsky.social
Image on packaging for some sort of toy toilet for children with the quote(?) “I look & sound like a grown-up toilet”
September 1, 2025 at 5:41 AM
rjhitch.bsky.social
Save Our Services LA: “we have a solution to LA’s budget crisis!”
The solution:
Screengrab from The Simpsons S4E12 “Marge vs. The Monorail”: in foreground, a hand points to a crude drawing in a spiral notebook of a stick figure driving a pickup truck full of bags of money. The stick figure is labeled “Me.” In the background of the drawing, there is a signpost with an arrow pointing in the direction the truck is traveling. The sign is labeled “To Tahiti.” There’s also a sun with a happy face in the background, indicating that this heist is taking place in broad daylight.
August 4, 2025 at 9:21 PM
rjhitch.bsky.social
White text on dark background reading “You Wouldn’t Download a Table.” Edited version of the “You Wouldn’t Steal a Car” bit from an early-2000’s anti-piracy PSA.
August 4, 2025 at 4:54 AM
rjhitch.bsky.social
Screengrab from IMDB of a trivia fact for the movie Quigley: “Gary Busey reportedly threw a fit on set because the set of heaven didn't look like the "real" heaven, which Busey claimed to have seen after almost dying in a motorcycle accident 1988. His fit became a fist fight when another actor, who also claimed to have seen the real heaven, disagreed with Busey's description, and production was shut down for the day.” 18 people are shown as having rated the fact as “Helpful,” with zero downvotes.
June 6, 2025 at 8:00 PM
rjhitch.bsky.social
Screencap from The Simpsons: a doctor standing behind a mockup of toy germs all trying to cram through a model door. Caption: “We call it ‘Three Stooges Syndrome.’”
May 12, 2025 at 11:08 PM
rjhitch.bsky.social
Scary looking white font on black background reading “YOU WOULDN’T DOWNLOAD A CAR”
May 5, 2025 at 12:24 AM
rjhitch.bsky.social
#MayThe4th
Michael Fassbender “Perfection” Meme Panel 1: From Andor: Luthen Rael (Stellan Skarsgard) looking intense as he says “I burn my life to make a sunrise I’ll never see.” Panel 2: Michael Fassbender in a black turtleneck saying “Show me the greatest dramatic monologue in all of Star Wars.” Panel 3: Kino Loy (Andy Serkis) staring determinedly ahead, saying “There are 5,000 of us. If we can fight half as hard as we’ve been working, we’ll be home in no time.” Panel 4: Michael Fassbender: “I said the greatest dramatic monologue in all of Star Wars.” Panel 5: Syril Karn (Kyle Soller) looking awkward as he stammers out “…success… and uh… justice.” Panel 6: Michael Fassbender: “Perfection.”
May 4, 2025 at 5:58 PM
rjhitch.bsky.social
lol
April 26, 2025 at 11:21 PM
rjhitch.bsky.social
ZERO likes, holy moly
April 26, 2025 at 9:07 PM
rjhitch.bsky.social
Imagine you’re robbing Elon Musk and he punches a hole in his drywall and immediately slices his hand open
Screencap of a tweet from Elon Musk. “Elon Musk • @elonmusk I have a WW1 trench knife embedded in my bedroom wall just in case. 1917 edition. More useful than a gun in close quarters.”
January 8, 2025 at 12:07 AM
rjhitch.bsky.social
*christopher moltisanti voice*
A box of compostable trash bags, photographed from above, displaying the brand name “AYOTEE”
December 13, 2024 at 5:48 PM
rjhitch.bsky.social
A screenshot of Gastly (the Pokémon, basic evolutionary form of Gengar) with a disappointed and/or shocked expression on its face, captioned with the subtitle “So what? No fuckin’ ziti now?”
December 10, 2024 at 2:14 AM
rjhitch.bsky.social
[[Rutherford is humping Pat's leg]] Rutherford: ARF! PANT PANT Pat: R-R-Rutherford! STOP this terrible BEHAVIOR! Pat: STOP IT! [[Pat strikes Rutherford]] <<WHACK!>> Rutherford: OWRP! Ray: Aw, don't worry Pat! He don't ejaculate! Pat: NOW HOW WOULD I KNOW THAT?! Pat: HOW WOULD I KNOW THAT THAT ROBOT DON'T EJACULATE?!
December 1, 2024 at 12:12 AM