It's that time of the semester when I open my inbox while chanting "no whammies."

Ours will supposedly get better once the HVAC figures out how to self-regulate. (I am not holding my breath).

I am debating my options: do I purchase a space heater or do I become a sentient pile of blankets?

I'm leaning towards the latter--it just sounds more fun.

Ok, this might be the cutest one in the thread.

Oh no. No. I do not deal with bats. I would have gotten out of there so fast.

That is not the twist I was expecting.

As someone who spends a ton of time in the Abilene area, this is VERY Texas.

True.

*When I was

Good lord. That's just an hilariously terrible typo.

In my experience, they capitalize things that they consider "terminology." WhwasI was a kid, we had some textbooks that would do this, e.g. "A Microscope is a tool used in Science," instead of bold type.

Almost fell over from former-Catholic-induced shock until I remembered the movie was coming out.

PUT ZE CANDLE BECK!

At what point do we just install a revolving bookcase secret door?