Donald J. Trump
@realdonaldtruump.bsky.social
SENILE PRESIDENT BY DAY. HAMBURGLAR BY NIGHT. PREVIOUS BFF OF JEFFREY EPSTEIN. CURRENTLY 5’11” AND 290 LBS OF LEAN, PATRIOTIC MASS
Parody; Not affiliated with POTUS or Donald Trump.
Parody; Not affiliated with POTUS or Donald Trump.
THIS IS WHAT MY SKULL LOOKS LIKE BTW.
September 25, 2025 at 10:01 PM
THIS IS WHAT MY SKULL LOOKS LIKE BTW.
JD WILL BE SPAGHETTI WRESTLING JIMMY KIMMEL ON THE FRONT LAWN OF THE WHITE HOUSE NEXT MONTH.
September 25, 2025 at 10:01 PM
JD WILL BE SPAGHETTI WRESTLING JIMMY KIMMEL ON THE FRONT LAWN OF THE WHITE HOUSE NEXT MONTH.
WHAT DOES CONSORTIUM MEAN.
September 25, 2025 at 10:00 PM
WHAT DOES CONSORTIUM MEAN.
MY BIG VLADDY DADDY IS LOYAL.
September 25, 2025 at 10:00 PM
MY BIG VLADDY DADDY IS LOYAL.
DISNEY HAS MUCH THE SAME CHOKEHOLD AS LITERAL EXTRA SODIUM AND WATER HAVE ON MY WEAK, WEAK HEART. SOME ARE SAYING ITS THE WEAKEST HEART. YOUVE NEVER SEEN AN EF THIS LOW.
September 23, 2025 at 3:04 PM
DISNEY HAS MUCH THE SAME CHOKEHOLD AS LITERAL EXTRA SODIUM AND WATER HAVE ON MY WEAK, WEAK HEART. SOME ARE SAYING ITS THE WEAKEST HEART. YOUVE NEVER SEEN AN EF THIS LOW.
WIND ISNT REAL. SHOW ME THE PROOF. YOU CANNOT PHYSICALLY SHOW ME
September 20, 2025 at 10:28 PM
WIND ISNT REAL. SHOW ME THE PROOF. YOU CANNOT PHYSICALLY SHOW ME
IM NOT EXACTLY SURE WHERE VENEZUELA IS. MAYBE I AM. MAYBE IM NOT. WHO CARES!
September 19, 2025 at 3:20 AM
IM NOT EXACTLY SURE WHERE VENEZUELA IS. MAYBE I AM. MAYBE IM NOT. WHO CARES!
JON STEWART. MORE LIKE JON SOUPART. YOU KNOW. THEY ASKED ME TO HOST THE DAILY SHOW. THEY SAID ID BE A GREAT HOST. MAYBE THE BEST EVER. I SAID MAYBE I WILL MAYBE I WONT. I DIDNT.
September 19, 2025 at 3:19 AM
JON STEWART. MORE LIKE JON SOUPART. YOU KNOW. THEY ASKED ME TO HOST THE DAILY SHOW. THEY SAID ID BE A GREAT HOST. MAYBE THE BEST EVER. I SAID MAYBE I WILL MAYBE I WONT. I DIDNT.
LIKE WHO? ME? I SOUND LIKE ME, MAYBE THE MOST OUT OF ANYONE. BIG SURPRISE! SEE WHAT THIS LIBERAL EDUCATION GETS US!
September 18, 2025 at 2:13 PM
LIKE WHO? ME? I SOUND LIKE ME, MAYBE THE MOST OUT OF ANYONE. BIG SURPRISE! SEE WHAT THIS LIBERAL EDUCATION GETS US!
EXCELLENT JOB SAM. ID LIKE YOU TO BE HEAD OF THE DEPARTMENT OF TWITCH. YOU WILL STREAM LIVE FROM THE WHITE HOUSE. I WILL CO-STREAM WITH YOU. YES JD WILL DO OUR MAKEUP
September 18, 2025 at 1:22 PM
EXCELLENT JOB SAM. ID LIKE YOU TO BE HEAD OF THE DEPARTMENT OF TWITCH. YOU WILL STREAM LIVE FROM THE WHITE HOUSE. I WILL CO-STREAM WITH YOU. YES JD WILL DO OUR MAKEUP
ROCK HARD OVER THIS! YOU MAY NOT BE ABLE TO NOTICE AS I DO HAVE A MICRO PENIS AND AM MORE OFTEN THAN NOT COMPLETELY IMPOTENT. MELANIA KNOWS NO PLEASURE!
September 18, 2025 at 1:21 PM
ROCK HARD OVER THIS! YOU MAY NOT BE ABLE TO NOTICE AS I DO HAVE A MICRO PENIS AND AM MORE OFTEN THAN NOT COMPLETELY IMPOTENT. MELANIA KNOWS NO PLEASURE!
THE BEST BOY? THERE IS ONE “BEST” AND ITS ME. IVE ALWAYS BEEN THE BEST. EVERYONE SAYS IT. EVERYONE KNOWS IT.
September 18, 2025 at 1:20 PM
THE BEST BOY? THERE IS ONE “BEST” AND ITS ME. IVE ALWAYS BEEN THE BEST. EVERYONE SAYS IT. EVERYONE KNOWS IT.
JIMMY KIMMEL HAD TO GO. MY LOVER, VLAD, IS VERY JEALOUS OF HIS HAIR. HIS PHYSIQUE. I COULDNT STAND SEEING MY LITTLE VLADDY DADDY UPSET LIKE THAT!
September 18, 2025 at 12:51 PM
JIMMY KIMMEL HAD TO GO. MY LOVER, VLAD, IS VERY JEALOUS OF HIS HAIR. HIS PHYSIQUE. I COULDNT STAND SEEING MY LITTLE VLADDY DADDY UPSET LIKE THAT!
I WILL NOT FUCK YOU! ASSUMING YOU ARE OVER 18, YOU ARE MUCH TOO OLD FOR ME!
September 18, 2025 at 12:49 PM
I WILL NOT FUCK YOU! ASSUMING YOU ARE OVER 18, YOU ARE MUCH TOO OLD FOR ME!
THE PEOPLE ARE CLAMORING FOR MORE OF ME. I KNOW. IVE HEARD IT SAID OVER AND OVER MR TRUMP PLEASE TAKE OVER FOR SPENCER “LITTLE” COX. I WONT DO IT! I HAVE A BUSY ENOUGH SCHEDULE. AFTER I WAKE UP AT NOON I COLOR FOR 4 HOURS. THEN ITS NAP TIME. AFTER NAP GOLF AND THEN SCREEN TIME! BUSY DAY!
September 18, 2025 at 12:48 PM
THE PEOPLE ARE CLAMORING FOR MORE OF ME. I KNOW. IVE HEARD IT SAID OVER AND OVER MR TRUMP PLEASE TAKE OVER FOR SPENCER “LITTLE” COX. I WONT DO IT! I HAVE A BUSY ENOUGH SCHEDULE. AFTER I WAKE UP AT NOON I COLOR FOR 4 HOURS. THEN ITS NAP TIME. AFTER NAP GOLF AND THEN SCREEN TIME! BUSY DAY!
I INCREASED THE VALUE OF EGGS! NOW, EVERYONE IN THE WORLD WILL WANT OUR EGGS. ART OF THE DEAL, DAVID.
September 18, 2025 at 12:44 PM
I INCREASED THE VALUE OF EGGS! NOW, EVERYONE IN THE WORLD WILL WANT OUR EGGS. ART OF THE DEAL, DAVID.
ANTIFA IS REAL YES. IGNORE THIS. THE MEN IN BLACK ARE ALSO REAL. AS WELL AS THE BOOGEY MAN. JUST KIDDING ON THAT LAST ONE! ITS JUST STEPHEN MILLER. HE SLEEPS UNDER MY BED AND LISTENS TO ME AND VLAD’S LIPS SMACK TOGETHER
September 18, 2025 at 12:43 PM
ANTIFA IS REAL YES. IGNORE THIS. THE MEN IN BLACK ARE ALSO REAL. AS WELL AS THE BOOGEY MAN. JUST KIDDING ON THAT LAST ONE! ITS JUST STEPHEN MILLER. HE SLEEPS UNDER MY BED AND LISTENS TO ME AND VLAD’S LIPS SMACK TOGETHER
PEOPLE LIKE HER SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO BE HONEST WITH PEOPLE! AND CERTAINLY SHOULDNT BE ABLE TO CALL ME OUT! THE LEFT IS VILE!
September 18, 2025 at 12:40 PM
PEOPLE LIKE HER SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO BE HONEST WITH PEOPLE! AND CERTAINLY SHOULDNT BE ABLE TO CALL ME OUT! THE LEFT IS VILE!
MAYBE THE GOD THAT WIPED OUT SODOM AND GOMORRAH! IM NOT SURE WHERE THOSE ARE OR WHAT THEY ARE. I HEARD SOMEONE ELSE SAY IT AND THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY!
September 18, 2025 at 12:38 PM
MAYBE THE GOD THAT WIPED OUT SODOM AND GOMORRAH! IM NOT SURE WHERE THOSE ARE OR WHAT THEY ARE. I HEARD SOMEONE ELSE SAY IT AND THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY!
THE SUPREME COURT IS LIKE MY LITTLE GIMP. I LOVE EM! BALL BAG AND ALL. ELON SHOWED ME WHAT A BALL GAG WAS. GREAT STUFF. THE BEST!
September 18, 2025 at 12:33 PM
THE SUPREME COURT IS LIKE MY LITTLE GIMP. I LOVE EM! BALL BAG AND ALL. ELON SHOWED ME WHAT A BALL GAG WAS. GREAT STUFF. THE BEST!
I AM ALSO LABELING ANTICUCK AS A TERRORIST ORG. STEPHEN MILLER IS VERY “PROCUCK” AND SAID THIS WOULD BE A GOOD THING.
September 18, 2025 at 12:31 PM
I AM ALSO LABELING ANTICUCK AS A TERRORIST ORG. STEPHEN MILLER IS VERY “PROCUCK” AND SAID THIS WOULD BE A GOOD THING.
I AM ALSO DESIGNATING THE CODENAME KIDS NEXT DOOR AS A TERRORIST ORG
September 18, 2025 at 12:30 PM
I AM ALSO DESIGNATING THE CODENAME KIDS NEXT DOOR AS A TERRORIST ORG