Orpheus "Tempest/Storm" Wren is very tired 🏳️‍⚧️
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probablyacryptid.bsky.social
Orpheus "Tempest/Storm" Wren is very tired 🏳️‍⚧️
@probablyacryptid.bsky.social
1.7K followers 720 following 22K posts
36, trans, physically broken, AuDHD, C-PTSD. Still wearing masks

Single but still married
NOT dating

Keybard author

he/him
Discord: (mutuals only, DM me)

Ko-fi books/music: https://ko-fi.com/orpheusandeli/shop

Get something free on me 💚
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probablyacryptid.bsky.social
logging on
A green, road sign-esque picture reading "[inside a ribbon] Welcome [outside ribbon] to AUDA CITY population: this bitch"
November 8, 2025 at 8:08 PM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
I love this in so, so many ways
November 7, 2025 at 2:28 AM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
My new psychiatry office's website has its quirks, but I think my favorite is that apparently my race is Legally Separated
A screenshot of a dropdown menu for race with the selection of Legally Separated
November 5, 2025 at 8:39 PM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
Some people need to hear this and will be angry about it. Some people need to hear this and will feel hurt or depressed or afraid. And some people need to hear this and are ready to hear this and start to do something with and because of this

Please, be the latter, if you can. We all need to be
November 2, 2025 at 12:28 AM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
I dunno if I can explain properly why, but this
November 1, 2025 at 11:08 PM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
I have French braided my hair for Halloween tomorrow, cause I want different curls than my lazy drifters for the best effect

Don't worry, I'll post an update tomorrow with the full effect
Tempest dying his hair (mostly shaved sides included) and mutton chops green, wearing a blue camo tank top Tempest at a different angle with clearly dark green hair and most of the dye scrubbed off his face and scalp. His mohawk is in two French braids
October 30, 2025 at 9:36 PM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
Post something random or you’ll have an awful November
An 80 oz jar of Great Value kosher whole dill pickles
October 29, 2025 at 4:26 PM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
I wrote this poem a while back and I honestly can't stop thinking about it
Not Actually The Devil Went Down To Georgia I Swear by Orpheus Wren The devil came to see me He knocked upon my door He smiled when I answered Said "I'd like to buy your soul It's got a different flavor, see So I'd like to buy it off of you for–" I stopped him there, "Nah, it's free You can't buy all of it anymore" The devil frowned at what I'd done He said "I don't think I understand" I shrugged and smiled, nodded then "I'm not really certain that you can" The devil shook his head, confused "But humans are always made of greed! You need money just to survive! Look, I'll give more than you need!" I just shrugged and smiled, wry "Eh, nah, I don't need more than this I put my soul up on my Ko-fi, see And right now? Life is kinda bliss Sometimes people buy a piece or two 'Pay what you want' for my soul's kiss If you want one too, take it for free! I wouldn't find that at all amiss" The devil only stared at me then Lost for what he could ever say To a man who has nothing at all But still give his soul freely away So, I took pity on the devil I tried to help him understand Though I know that demons don't And I'm not certain that they can "My soul is written into my words It's strummed into my every song It's stitched into the clothes I make Poured into my garden growing strong I cannot sell you what I would give Freely to any person I would meet I cannot lose to you what can't be lost Submission as defiance and not defeat In choosing not to seek reward, I win For my reward is found in joy and hope In smiles made and comfort given In showing a different path to cope It may be I have no riches, it's true It may be I often struggle just to breathe But what is freely given in love and peace Is all the legacy I would seek to leave I cannot sell my soul to you, my friend For I give my soul away, it's finally free You cannot buy what was never mine I was made to give and show and be If you want to buy a piece, you can But you can't buy all of it from me For much of it lives in other's hearts In what they read and hear and see" The devil shook his head, amazed I watched him turn and walk away I wonder what he did after that When he could not buy my soul that day Did he find my Ko-fi, buy a piece? I don't know, for he did not say I do not regret that choice I made To give away these many parts of me For in not playing the devil's game Only then, have I been able to be free
October 27, 2025 at 12:03 AM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
@floregonian.com Hey Jermy, Glenn Chambers, the drummer from The Big Push SAAAANGS
October 24, 2025 at 1:58 AM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
Wonder how that got there. Presumably a local trans man
A picture of a stall in a men's bathroom with a sticker on the wall with the trans flag and the text "a trans person peed here a nothing bad happened"
October 23, 2025 at 4:17 PM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
Well, you heard it

(Co-Star really gets thirsty sometimes, hmm?)
A screenshot from Co-Star telling me to touch myself
October 22, 2025 at 5:53 PM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
Well, if you insist...
A screenshot of an Ellipsus folder reading "Decisions 2032+" that claims I last worked on it 4 months ago but that's inaccurate. That may be when I last changed a folder inside?
October 15, 2025 at 3:46 PM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
Tired

But also this happened. Empty medicine bottle worked great as a tool for it!
Two paper plates, the left one holding regular popping corn. The right one holds tan to brown to red to purple kernels twice that size. Orpheus grew the ones on the right plate
October 12, 2025 at 2:33 AM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
I should honestly never be given permission to conlang ever
"Sivulta?" they asked the man. "Off the coast of Tashkaikyo?" "Yes, Captain." The man nodded, smirking. "No many has heard of my home. Has you come there?" "No, but it does explain the monkeys. I've read journals from men who have been there." They eyed the furry creatures with interest. "I assume your 'usefulness' involves these curious creatures. Yes, you can come to me." They held out a hand to one who was clearly thinking about jumping onto them. "Klitlinguata, Szaiszai, desh kaszti," Arnulfo murmured to the clinging creature, who leapt to Eulian's hand and climbed up their arm to perch on their shoulder, clinging to and sniffing their hair. "This one is Szaiszai, she being of m'Klayshen she has not manners." Eulian gently disuaded the tiny creature from sticking her fingers up their nose. "So I see. She's very curious. Was that a command you gave her? Are they trained?" He nodded. "To a way. Szaiszai, sient pash tuingo, fartun." The little monkey leapt back to him. "Szaiszai does not choose to train courtesy with not myself. She will stay by me when call and if not permission given to explore. She understand order. M'Klayshen think not as we, but near."
October 5, 2025 at 3:08 AM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
Thrift stores always have the best fucking stuff I fucking swear to fucking Lugh/Lleu
A curved handle wooden cane witth a bike horn and rear view mirror attached under the handle
September 30, 2025 at 3:35 AM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
What's you sign
Today's specials crushing Dystopian sadness 2 55
September 28, 2025 at 8:25 PM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
You should look at my butter hole
a pineapple upside down cake, still in the pan, sitting on a cast iron griddle. Somehow, inexplicably, to the bottom left there is a hole in the middle with a pool of melted butter in it
September 28, 2025 at 2:45 AM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
Thank you! It was a pretty great day!

Also a bit fan of my birthday cake
A buttercream frost cake with green 3 and 7 candles hiding behind four modeling chocolate bust figures tha are supposed to be The Big Push at their Brighton Dome should Gorran and Ren have visible nipples, Romain is wearing leopard print, and Glenn is in a white tank top
September 27, 2025 at 7:24 PM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
I've been on HRT for a little over 1 year and I am ABSOLUTELY CONFIDENT that transitioning save my life

EVERYONE should have healthcare, bodily autonomy is a FUNDAMENTAL human right

🏳️‍⚧️💙❤️‍🔥🏳️‍🌈🎭🐦

(It's been helping heal my brain damage!!! Also I feel so much more... me)
Tempest/Orpheus pre-transition wearing rainbow glasses and a shirt that boosted my boobs, trying to smile and pretend I wasn't super, super filled with trauma and unhappy about everything in my life at the time Tempest/Orpheus a week or two ago wearing a blue plaid shirt, and tile pattern tie, and cat suspenders, hanging out in his hammock and looking and feeling sassy AF I love how much I look like my grandfather these days 🥹🥹🥹😭
September 27, 2025 at 7:21 PM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
I have committed food crimes. Delicious, delicious food crimes

Two Fillo's walking tamales (one salsa roja and the other one habanero), a slice of Tocino spam, dill pickle slices, and hiding in the Spam and tamales is pickled ginger
A sandwich made of two tamales, one kinda orange with visible beans and the other beige with beans, a slice of spam, and a visible dill pickles slice, wrapped in paper towels. The ginger is hiding
September 24, 2025 at 12:05 AM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
It was a pretty good birthday. They say a picture is worth 1000 words, so here's a short story

My cake has The Big Push on it, by the way
a cake with busts of The Big Push members Glenn Chambers, Gorran Kendall, Ren Gill, and Romain Axisa as modeling chocolate figures on to. Ren and Gorran are both shirtless and have nipples, which was SO FUCKING WEIRD to do with modeling chocolate but also I was doing them at the Brighton Dome and they weren't wearing shirts??? Tempest/Orpheus wearing three hats, holding a fistful of seed packets including licorice, tomatoes, ghost peppers, and zucchini, holding the box of a microphone, with a harmonica in his mouth, looking like he's trying not to laugh. He's also wearing his "good vibes or good bye" crop top and blue plaid shorts A chocolate cake layered with hazelnut buttercream frosting and banana slices A fire in the fire pit burning WHITE HOT and 6 feet in the air! Not entirely certain how we did that! This photo is lit ONLY by firelight!
September 23, 2025 at 7:25 AM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
... AM I??? There's some pretty funny fuck around these parts, I dunno...
A screen from Co-Star reading "You're the funniest person you know."
September 19, 2025 at 9:00 PM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
Hey @nofunoverlord.top

Look what I got for my birthday for a friend online!!
Tempest/Orpheus wearing a blue and pink reusable P100 half mask, as well as a grey and red plaid shirt and cat suspenders, while sitting in his hammock
September 19, 2025 at 8:21 PM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
I dunno what the hell this fit is, but I kinda love it
Tempest/Orpheus Wren leaning back in his hammock, mohawk pulled back in a tail and sides freshly shaved. He is wearing a blue plaid shirt, red and grey tile pattern tie, and black suspenders with cats on them. On arm is behind his head and he is wearing his smirk-smile
September 18, 2025 at 6:53 PM
probablyacryptid.bsky.social
The worst should be over now

I'm gonna keep my mask on a couple more days to ensure everyone here stays safe, but the rest is just fighting off the lingering effects, I think. My asthma is a bit worse right now, this is hardly surprising, and I'm still tired, but nearly done
A used Covid test with only the control line red. Not even the faintest line on the test line!
September 15, 2025 at 3:36 AM