Rich kid: I want a feast

Me: No for sure, I could eat

Rich kid: I want BEAN feast!

Me: WTF

When I tell people "I'm doing well", it's shorthand for 450mg Wellbutrin extended-release to dull my around the clock dread 😶‍🌫️👍

If you see Chalamet put on 20+ lbs of muscle, Luigi movie confirmed.

The most wonderful part of Chicago's first big snow each year is learning the routines of the rats that live amongst you via their paw prints.

I really wish the ultra rich would focus less on world dominance, and more on exchanging fancy mustards through limousine windows.

I didn't think donation means what you think it means.