In compensation for being absent for a while, I offer a simple Penelope thirst trap.

WHY IS SHE SO FUCKING PRETTY IM GONNA DIE

Who knows? Maybe these new "team-building exercises" will catch on in the Adders and in the Grand Companies as a whole. Penelope might even be sent out to teach hands-on classes on the subject!

(🧵 4/4)

(Penelope, the deerlezen, uses they/them)

#elezen | #ffxivnsfw

Adder command is now noticing a sudden uptick in unit morale, specifically those working under Penelope. It also seems to have come with more requests for anti-aching balms from the local alchemists. Coincidence?

(🧵 3/4)

(Penelope, the deerlezen, uses they/them)

#elezen | #ffxivnsfw

Seems it's too late to change those sign-on bonuses, and Penelope is never one to go back on their word (even if it *was* an accident). You won't hear any complaints from Penelope and the girls, though.

(🧵 2/4)

(Penelope, the deerlezen, uses they/them)

#elezen | #ffxivnsfw

Penelope put up flyers to help drive recruitment for the Adders but made a typo for the sign-on bonus... now it seems a lot of the Gridanian gals who like Penelope are only joining up for "de-stress services"... (🧵 1/4)

(Penelope, the deerlezen, uses they/them)

#elezen | #ffxivnsfw

"Y'all don't even have physical education, do ya? No wonder you only lasted thirty seconds! Get down here and lemme show ya the ropes. Maybe if we're lucky, we won't get caught by the time I'm done with you~..."

#lalafellnsfw

(Character uses they/them and is an adult)
(🧵 3/3)

"Gal like you is packin' and you ain't even usin' it... lay down and lemme fix that for you."

#lalafellnsfw

(Character uses they/them and is an adult)
(🧵 2/3)

*Unintelligible deepthroat noises*

"I don't... *slurp* ... remember... *gulp* ... this in the... *glk* ... Studium's syllabus... *hhgk*..."

"I don't give a damn if the classroom next door can hear... you better not stop..."