I want to eat garlic bread for every meal of my life but Big Government won’t let me

I got a used copy of Pokémon moon and they previous owner didn’t delete his save file and now I feel like I can’t delete it bc he nicknamed some of them. They were loved I can’t kill them omg?

Today i bonded with the car next to me bc a cybertruck was stopped in front of me at a red light. We both rolled down our windows and started talking about how much of a loser he was until the light turned green. Community lmao ❤️

I saw someone with a reusable Lockheed Martin bag for their groceries the other day what the fuck 😀well if they’re can’t manufacture anything to save lives at least they can help consumers save on a little plastic

it's time to kill the music
it's time to cut the lights
it's time to fight the Muppets in the parking lot tonight

Usher at the movie theater tipped my ticket and saw that it was for Babygirl and went “awww” but sadly. ?????

MARY JANE: sorry about your uncle dan

PETER PARKER: it’s ben

MARY JANE: 🎵one week since you looked at me

Finally established my regular Dunkin’ coffee order and now I feel like an adult