really I just wanna be like fuck everything and be mad but i don’t want the judgement from the people around me or to be seen as ungrateful or something 🙃🙃🙃

and it’s a little hard bc I say breaking point, but the problem is that I won’t let myself reach that either which is where a whole bunch of distress is coming from. 🥲 like I keep telling myself I can handle it or there’s reasons it’s this way and it’s okay and I’m trying to be understanding and

my tolerance for things in friendships is so different to other people as well so I just genuinely never know what expectations people want me to meet. 😭

I just wanna make things I like and that bring me joy and share that with other people every so often after I’ve stockpiled a bunch of excess items I guess 🤷🏻‍♀️

Honestly the dream is able to run a little market stall every so often, have a very simple online store and idk. Maybe try a convention or two? I really don’t feel the desire to do this full time/want the whole song and dance to put it out there on social media and worry about content

I’m well past the point of being able to mask even a little during all of this in front of everyone and it’s making things very, very hard 🥲 I wish I wasn’t so dissociated while seeing everyone before we go because I feel like I’m just not getting to appreciate it fully

Leaving my hair alone is already hard enough during all of thisssssss let me have more permanent body stickers

I’m just really, really hopeful for a good 2025. I want this move to go smoothly. I want to live a happy and peaceful life.

try and push through the agoraphobia so I can feel a bit more free with my day to day. We’ll be living near a craft store, so being able to drive down there on my own would be really lovely, and being able run small errands independently would be incredible.

I really want to try and engage more with the D&D community and hopefully some local craft groups, and wouldn’t mind trying to branch out a little more online again for these things as well. I want to surround myself with things that inspire me, and I want to work with my mental health supports to

Jeremy will have his family up there, but neither of us have any friends in the city we’re moving to. it’s gonna be a really big change and I guess a big motivator to try and get involved more with the communities we’re interested in.

doing a major move as an adult/being out of school and having that as a way to make connections so I’m really nervous, but I’m I’m surprisingly looking forward to learning a new side of me as well.