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offsammich.bsky.social
hugo fromage
@offsammich.bsky.social
200 followers 230 following 720 posts
hugo | she/they | 30-whatever | here for pirates and literally anything else people who love pirates love
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offsammich.bsky.social
Without downloading any new images, where are you mentally?
It’s that painting, you know the one, where the one lady with her tits out reaches over to delicately pinch the nipple of the other lady with her tits out. I think it’s called something something prostitutes something.
August 26, 2025 at 4:40 AM
offsammich.bsky.social
:)
Page reads “Every kiss is perfect with Ed” Ed laughs as Stede kisses and/or eats his nose. Stede holds his elbow.
May 31, 2025 at 1:16 AM
offsammich.bsky.social
Page reads “5. Not paying any attention to what she is saying” Stede, who is busy reading and looking sad, says “Hm? Yes, okay dear, have fun,” to an irate Mary, in the background, and blows her a distracted kiss. Page reads “6. Perfect” A more delicate and marginally less hasty drawing of Ed and Stede’s kiss on the beach in 1x09. At the bottom right, and tantalising little “But…” carries us to the final page.
May 31, 2025 at 1:14 AM
offsammich.bsky.social
Page reads “3. Both lips over both of her lips” Stede, eyes closed, has Mary’s entire mouth in his mouth. She looks duly horrified. (Side note: THIS HAPPENED TO ME) Page reads “4. Directly into the ear (LOUD)” A disgruntled Mary pushes away Stede, who, eyes closed, is kissing her directly in the ear hole.
May 31, 2025 at 1:11 AM
offsammich.bsky.social
Page reads “1. Missed her entirely (their wedding)” Mary, on the left, is wearing her bridal veil and looking awkwardly to the side as Stede, on the right, pecks the air a full six inches from her face. Page reads “2. Accidental tongue up the nose” Mary looks upset as Stede, eyes closed, goes in tongue first and licks her right nostril.
May 31, 2025 at 1:08 AM
offsammich.bsky.social
#OFMDzineweek looked like too much fun to NOT try
The cover of a small, handmade paper booklet entitled “A Brief Taxonomy of Five Terrible Kisses That Stede Gave Mary (and one good one he gave Ed)” The typography attempts to be festive despite the artist’s lack of patience and skill.
May 31, 2025 at 1:05 AM
offsammich.bsky.social
Oh hell yes 😌💕💦
April 21, 2025 at 2:02 PM
offsammich.bsky.social
LOOK! AT! THEM! 🥹💕
@mahnah.bsky.social is SO lovely and SO talented and I am thrilled beyond belief to have a real life piece of art from them that I can touch with my actual human hands (but I won’t because I shouldn’t)
(but I COULD)
(but I shan’t)
(but I want to)
😶🌠
A set of four beautiful black and white linoleum prints arranged in a square. From L to R and top to bottom, they show Stedeth, Ed, Ed, and Stede. All of them are resting their chins adorably on their hands and looking positively smitten with each other.
January 14, 2025 at 8:56 PM
offsammich.bsky.social
This lil bud stole my heart pretty darn fast, and hasn’t budged since.
January 9, 2025 at 3:01 AM
offsammich.bsky.social
whoops, I—
January 5, 2025 at 5:53 AM
offsammich.bsky.social
a haiku for my monsterlovers 💕😌
January 5, 2025 at 5:31 AM
offsammich.bsky.social
I found this yarn that gives me real depression robe vibes, but I’m sort of stumped as to what to knit with it. I’ve got about 600yds/200g, but could potentially acquire more. Seeking ideas, suggestions, favorite patterns, etc.
A ball of sock-weight twisted cotton yarn in mostly bright pink and red but with spots of purple, dark and light blues, and white.
December 23, 2024 at 11:01 PM
offsammich.bsky.social
tee hee look at this silly pirate plate i got at a yard sale
a picture of a large, white dinner plate with knots around the rim and a very fancy ship sailing in the middle with billowing sails and fluttering flags. The ship is blue, green, purple, and yellow. Very gay, very festive.
December 16, 2024 at 5:14 PM
offsammich.bsky.social
I quite enjoy this one. If you feel like it, post an image you saved just because it made you laugh.
A strongman is, with great strain and difficulty, lifting what appears to be either a large rock or the world’s biggest potato. Another large man watches, awe-struck, in the background. The man in the background is labelled “My Mom.” The strongman is labelled “Me.” The rock and/or potato is labelled “All of the groceries.”
December 5, 2024 at 5:13 AM
offsammich.bsky.social
It’s the anniversary of wanna fly away (archiveofourown.org/works/492499...) by @petrichorca.bsky.social and @ghostalservice.bsky.social, one of the best fics I’ve ever read. Inspired me to read the entire Animorphs series, write shouty essays, and make some painfully earnest artwork. Changed me. 💕
A well-meaning but imperfectly-executed drawing of an Andalite: a blue, four-legged, two-armed, part-deer, part-scorpion alien with a humanoid torso, similar to a centaur, but a little less terrestrial. It is kneeling with its front two deer legs and standing with its back two deer legs, sprinkling some fertiliser or something over a small, green shoot of something growing out of the earth. It is wearing gardening gloves that have been modified to have seven fingers on each hand, and a straw sun visor with a rim floppy enough to cover its face. The background is a vaguely browny-yellow hopefully suggesting a garden or other outdoor environs without the artist having had to actually draw them.
October 20, 2024 at 8:55 PM