紫煞🪻Zǐshā
@nyancheng.bsky.social
Side account for all the thoughts I don’t feel like bugging my main feed (jiangzongzhu) with ꕥ she/her ꕥ 30+ ꕥ minors DNI - FUB free ꕥ
Pinned
紫煞🪻Zǐshā
@nyancheng.bsky.social
· Jan 26
With the current state of the world I truly don’t feel comfortable having my real name tied to this account. I’ll direct people here from my main fandom account but will be keeping the display name on here one of my dnd characters names
Zisha/Lilith/Illyrae
Zisha/Lilith/Illyrae
Crashing out on a sunday night because SHE’S NOT ALLOWED TO GET INTO HYPERFIXATION if she’s going to fucking wrong and still be so fucking awful years later and just as borderline sinophobic about “gege” being nc3st as she was years ago about sworn brothers supposedly being the same thing
September 22, 2025 at 4:39 AM
Crashing out on a sunday night because SHE’S NOT ALLOWED TO GET INTO HYPERFIXATION if she’s going to fucking wrong and still be so fucking awful years later and just as borderline sinophobic about “gege” being nc3st as she was years ago about sworn brothers supposedly being the same thing
Wanting to share this PHENOMENAL piece of art with Caleb as an ancient Chinese war general because holy shit if we ever get a historical multibanner I will scream
but then remembering our chat now has someone in it who has something against “the white one” who shouldn’t talk about Chinese culture 🙂
but then remembering our chat now has someone in it who has something against “the white one” who shouldn’t talk about Chinese culture 🙂
September 1, 2025 at 9:20 PM
Wanting to share this PHENOMENAL piece of art with Caleb as an ancient Chinese war general because holy shit if we ever get a historical multibanner I will scream
but then remembering our chat now has someone in it who has something against “the white one” who shouldn’t talk about Chinese culture 🙂
but then remembering our chat now has someone in it who has something against “the white one” who shouldn’t talk about Chinese culture 🙂
“There’s no room for a dark love interest/enemies to lovers romance in l@ds because this is a safe space for women”
Huh… fake a smile. I respect all opinions but that’s pretty subjective. Whatever.
“But I’m a cishet woman so I value having a space for healthy m/f relationships.”
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Huh… fake a smile. I respect all opinions but that’s pretty subjective. Whatever.
“But I’m a cishet woman so I value having a space for healthy m/f relationships.”
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
August 30, 2025 at 2:47 AM
“There’s no room for a dark love interest/enemies to lovers romance in l@ds because this is a safe space for women”
Huh… fake a smile. I respect all opinions but that’s pretty subjective. Whatever.
“But I’m a cishet woman so I value having a space for healthy m/f relationships.”
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Huh… fake a smile. I respect all opinions but that’s pretty subjective. Whatever.
“But I’m a cishet woman so I value having a space for healthy m/f relationships.”
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
I am capable of continuing to push forward. Resilience has always been my strong suit. But it doesn’t mean I want to. But at the same time I do need those little pushes that hey, here’s something to help, it’s okay to accept so the push forward isn’t quite as tedious
August 27, 2025 at 5:39 AM
I am capable of continuing to push forward. Resilience has always been my strong suit. But it doesn’t mean I want to. But at the same time I do need those little pushes that hey, here’s something to help, it’s okay to accept so the push forward isn’t quite as tedious
My kink is very quickly becoming yeeting myself out of fandom spaces the moment I get uncomfy. catch me only existing in dms and private friend servers and occasionally popping my head in once every full moon to the non-problematic spaces to say one thing and disappear again
August 2, 2025 at 6:52 PM
My kink is very quickly becoming yeeting myself out of fandom spaces the moment I get uncomfy. catch me only existing in dms and private friend servers and occasionally popping my head in once every full moon to the non-problematic spaces to say one thing and disappear again
“That client that made you cry three days in a row a couple weeks ago is really questioning the effectiveness of organic social in terms of pushing sales”
tell them to suck a dick because that’s not how *organic* social works
tell them to suck a dick because that’s not how *organic* social works
July 31, 2025 at 4:03 PM
“That client that made you cry three days in a row a couple weeks ago is really questioning the effectiveness of organic social in terms of pushing sales”
tell them to suck a dick because that’s not how *organic* social works
tell them to suck a dick because that’s not how *organic* social works
I am not 🙂 being paid enough 🙂 in this freelance job 🙂 to sit through 🙂 in an hour long cameras on meeting 🙂 only to start sobbing 🙂 the moment I close the meeting tab 🙃
July 16, 2025 at 11:00 PM
I am not 🙂 being paid enough 🙂 in this freelance job 🙂 to sit through 🙂 in an hour long cameras on meeting 🙂 only to start sobbing 🙂 the moment I close the meeting tab 🙃
I’m so tired of learning experiences and “this isn’t forever but you’ll be stronger when you get through it”
I don’t need to be stronger. I’m tired of being strong and resilient. I’m fucking tired.
I don’t need to be stronger. I’m tired of being strong and resilient. I’m fucking tired.
July 16, 2025 at 2:02 AM
I’m so tired of learning experiences and “this isn’t forever but you’ll be stronger when you get through it”
I don’t need to be stronger. I’m tired of being strong and resilient. I’m fucking tired.
I don’t need to be stronger. I’m tired of being strong and resilient. I’m fucking tired.
Tell me why tf this part time freelance gig is doing so much more fucking damage to my mental health than my full time job did
July 12, 2025 at 6:08 PM
Tell me why tf this part time freelance gig is doing so much more fucking damage to my mental health than my full time job did
I should block everyone I don’t know who follows my “not a real person this is just for shit I’m actually interested in” ig account. But low key I’m hoping the account very straight forwardly named “finsta” that views all my stories is my ex best friend and that she realizes that my stupid
June 25, 2025 at 12:32 AM
I should block everyone I don’t know who follows my “not a real person this is just for shit I’m actually interested in” ig account. But low key I’m hoping the account very straight forwardly named “finsta” that views all my stories is my ex best friend and that she realizes that my stupid
I AM SO FUCKING CONFUSED BY THIS COMPANY I STG
MOTHER FUCKING COMMUNICATE
MOTHER FUCKING COMMUNICATE
June 19, 2025 at 3:34 PM
I AM SO FUCKING CONFUSED BY THIS COMPANY I STG
MOTHER FUCKING COMMUNICATE
MOTHER FUCKING COMMUNICATE
Sibling solidarity is my big brother and baby sister calling me and wishing me a happy Father’s Day because I’m not the step dad, I’m the dad that stepped up
Love those assholes so much
Love those assholes so much
June 16, 2025 at 1:12 AM
Sibling solidarity is my big brother and baby sister calling me and wishing me a happy Father’s Day because I’m not the step dad, I’m the dad that stepped up
Love those assholes so much
Love those assholes so much
So anyway, still happy birthday Caleb! Even if it was two days ago, it’s still more important than anything going on today!
June 15, 2025 at 6:51 PM
So anyway, still happy birthday Caleb! Even if it was two days ago, it’s still more important than anything going on today!
Was gonna make a post yesterday about how the birthday of the fictional man I became obsessed with a month and a half ago was more important than my former best friend’s birthday that was coming two days later. Didn’t even realize it was father’s day on top of that
June 15, 2025 at 6:51 PM
Was gonna make a post yesterday about how the birthday of the fictional man I became obsessed with a month and a half ago was more important than my former best friend’s birthday that was coming two days later. Didn’t even realize it was father’s day on top of that
Also I just gotta say. LA proving again for the second time this awful fucking year why I love it so much. The community here is everything.
June 11, 2025 at 3:25 AM
Also I just gotta say. LA proving again for the second time this awful fucking year why I love it so much. The community here is everything.
Calling Gavin Newsom the child of Regina George and Patrick Bateman is my new favorite analogy. Thank you man on IG. He’s a psycho bitch but he’s our psycho bitch
June 11, 2025 at 3:23 AM
Calling Gavin Newsom the child of Regina George and Patrick Bateman is my new favorite analogy. Thank you man on IG. He’s a psycho bitch but he’s our psycho bitch
> opens up the stupid app
> Caleb: I’ll remember in case you forget
> me: aww that’s cute
> me: …
> me: <literally screeches so loud once I realize that my partner has to come check if I’m okay>
> Caleb: I’ll remember in case you forget
> me: aww that’s cute
> me: …
> me: <literally screeches so loud once I realize that my partner has to come check if I’m okay>
June 1, 2025 at 8:51 PM
> opens up the stupid app
> Caleb: I’ll remember in case you forget
> me: aww that’s cute
> me: …
> me: <literally screeches so loud once I realize that my partner has to come check if I’m okay>
> Caleb: I’ll remember in case you forget
> me: aww that’s cute
> me: …
> me: <literally screeches so loud once I realize that my partner has to come check if I’m okay>
Baby sister is currently only an hour and a half away from me while I’m laying in bed writing sad things because sad. But I hope she’s at least having a good time and maybe falls in love with California so she’ll want to move here.
May 25, 2025 at 5:34 AM
Baby sister is currently only an hour and a half away from me while I’m laying in bed writing sad things because sad. But I hope she’s at least having a good time and maybe falls in love with California so she’ll want to move here.
My god damn mailbox unit thing has been broken for two weeks and the post office has 0 information as to when it will be fixed. I’ve gotten SOME of my mail but my god damn passport is out for delivery today and my original birth certificate is supposed to be delivered tomorrow so like… STRESSING
May 23, 2025 at 10:03 PM
My god damn mailbox unit thing has been broken for two weeks and the post office has 0 information as to when it will be fixed. I’ve gotten SOME of my mail but my god damn passport is out for delivery today and my original birth certificate is supposed to be delivered tomorrow so like… STRESSING
the only joy I have left in life is spending four years finding new and creative ways to refer to the soggy pringle in chief so as to never say his name or the title I guess he holds
May 14, 2025 at 10:31 PM
the only joy I have left in life is spending four years finding new and creative ways to refer to the soggy pringle in chief so as to never say his name or the title I guess he holds
Part of being shitty to me and treating me poorly means I *will* discuss things with my baby sister. I do also tell her about when people are wonderful to me, she just knows everything. But when you’re shitty to someone with a sister, you become an enemy of said sister.
May 14, 2025 at 1:36 AM
Part of being shitty to me and treating me poorly means I *will* discuss things with my baby sister. I do also tell her about when people are wonderful to me, she just knows everything. But when you’re shitty to someone with a sister, you become an enemy of said sister.
Good news good news good news good news 😭
Still not perfect but it’s SOMETHING and it can maybe allow me to get to a better place mentally
Still not perfect but it’s SOMETHING and it can maybe allow me to get to a better place mentally
May 7, 2025 at 11:10 PM
Good news good news good news good news 😭
Still not perfect but it’s SOMETHING and it can maybe allow me to get to a better place mentally
Still not perfect but it’s SOMETHING and it can maybe allow me to get to a better place mentally
Four hours ago I sincerely thought a long shower would help me feel better. And like… in the regard I had in mind it *did* but only because it somehow gave me a headache so bad it made me nauseous and almost pass out
But I DIDNT pass out so that’s the important part. Fingers crossed sleep fixes it
But I DIDNT pass out so that’s the important part. Fingers crossed sleep fixes it
May 7, 2025 at 6:10 AM
Four hours ago I sincerely thought a long shower would help me feel better. And like… in the regard I had in mind it *did* but only because it somehow gave me a headache so bad it made me nauseous and almost pass out
But I DIDNT pass out so that’s the important part. Fingers crossed sleep fixes it
But I DIDNT pass out so that’s the important part. Fingers crossed sleep fixes it
The last forty minutes of Fulgur’s second to last stream had me sobbing so hard I thought I would be sick. Fuck you Millie Parfait you wonderful human being. And all of nijisanji what the fuckkkk
May 5, 2025 at 3:59 AM
The last forty minutes of Fulgur’s second to last stream had me sobbing so hard I thought I would be sick. Fuck you Millie Parfait you wonderful human being. And all of nijisanji what the fuckkkk
God the words in my brain right now are neither kind nor quiet
April 30, 2025 at 4:40 AM
God the words in my brain right now are neither kind nor quiet