"ity" at the end of a word makes it infinitely better.
Special not as great as speciality.
Hospital scary, hospitality I'm going on vacation.
T an average letter, titty infinite happiness.
Special not as great as speciality.
Hospital scary, hospitality I'm going on vacation.
T an average letter, titty infinite happiness.
January 27, 2026 at 12:40 AM
"ity" at the end of a word makes it infinitely better.
Special not as great as speciality.
Hospital scary, hospitality I'm going on vacation.
T an average letter, titty infinite happiness.
Special not as great as speciality.
Hospital scary, hospitality I'm going on vacation.
T an average letter, titty infinite happiness.
Can I hit a curve ball? Yes I can. Throw a perfect spiral and hit my target. Yes I can. Build a deck, rewire a panel, rebuild a carburetor? Yup.
Sew up the favourite stuffy so he can have his best friend back with no holes and full of stuffing. Hell yeah. That's dad shit right there. We fix stuff.
Sew up the favourite stuffy so he can have his best friend back with no holes and full of stuffing. Hell yeah. That's dad shit right there. We fix stuff.
March 19, 2025 at 1:23 AM
Can I hit a curve ball? Yes I can. Throw a perfect spiral and hit my target. Yes I can. Build a deck, rewire a panel, rebuild a carburetor? Yup.
Sew up the favourite stuffy so he can have his best friend back with no holes and full of stuffing. Hell yeah. That's dad shit right there. We fix stuff.
Sew up the favourite stuffy so he can have his best friend back with no holes and full of stuffing. Hell yeah. That's dad shit right there. We fix stuff.
Corn dogs are just low rent beef wellington.
Discuss.
Discuss.
February 27, 2025 at 6:27 PM
Corn dogs are just low rent beef wellington.
Discuss.
Discuss.
Just watched the SNL 50th Anniversary show. Great show. Laughed out loud a few times. But I have one question.
Did anyone else notice Cher giving Kevin Costner an over the pants handy while they were sitting in the audience?
So yeah, great show.
Did anyone else notice Cher giving Kevin Costner an over the pants handy while they were sitting in the audience?
So yeah, great show.
February 19, 2025 at 3:55 PM
Just watched the SNL 50th Anniversary show. Great show. Laughed out loud a few times. But I have one question.
Did anyone else notice Cher giving Kevin Costner an over the pants handy while they were sitting in the audience?
So yeah, great show.
Did anyone else notice Cher giving Kevin Costner an over the pants handy while they were sitting in the audience?
So yeah, great show.
With all this DOGE and the Treasury stuff going on, I'm just waiting for my email from some US.Gov telling me that I qualify for 1 years worth of credit monitoring like my data got stolen from the Best Buy.
February 4, 2025 at 11:20 PM
With all this DOGE and the Treasury stuff going on, I'm just waiting for my email from some US.Gov telling me that I qualify for 1 years worth of credit monitoring like my data got stolen from the Best Buy.
$50 for two single cheese burgers, one double cheeseburger, three drinks, large fries at the Five Guys. Of course I'm going to take a big ole bag of peanuts home. It just makes economic sense.
January 12, 2025 at 11:37 PM
$50 for two single cheese burgers, one double cheeseburger, three drinks, large fries at the Five Guys. Of course I'm going to take a big ole bag of peanuts home. It just makes economic sense.
Luigi Mangion is a modern day Cousin Eddie from Christmas Vacation.
December 22, 2024 at 3:12 AM
Luigi Mangion is a modern day Cousin Eddie from Christmas Vacation.
Egg rolls are just Chinese cannolis.
December 8, 2024 at 11:47 PM
Egg rolls are just Chinese cannolis.
99% of my fears are irrational.
So I'm walking past the meat department at the store and my brain goes "what if I decide to get something and I forget the words for it and say "could I get two lbs of chicken tits?"" Said with absolute confidence even the butcher repeats it.
So I'm walking past the meat department at the store and my brain goes "what if I decide to get something and I forget the words for it and say "could I get two lbs of chicken tits?"" Said with absolute confidence even the butcher repeats it.
August 28, 2024 at 11:24 PM
99% of my fears are irrational.
So I'm walking past the meat department at the store and my brain goes "what if I decide to get something and I forget the words for it and say "could I get two lbs of chicken tits?"" Said with absolute confidence even the butcher repeats it.
So I'm walking past the meat department at the store and my brain goes "what if I decide to get something and I forget the words for it and say "could I get two lbs of chicken tits?"" Said with absolute confidence even the butcher repeats it.
Nachos are a casserole.
Fight me.
Fight me.
August 28, 2024 at 10:33 PM
Nachos are a casserole.
Fight me.
Fight me.
While I can appreciate how much it tastes exactly as advertised, if you want a snack but don't want to finish off an entire bag and wreck dinner, I recommend Lay's Cheesy Garlic Bread flavour. A few bites in and you'll be saying "well that's enough of these."
August 25, 2024 at 7:28 PM
While I can appreciate how much it tastes exactly as advertised, if you want a snack but don't want to finish off an entire bag and wreck dinner, I recommend Lay's Cheesy Garlic Bread flavour. A few bites in and you'll be saying "well that's enough of these."
I think I made an emo mosquito. Sprayed it with some deet and now it hates itself.
August 23, 2024 at 11:52 PM
I think I made an emo mosquito. Sprayed it with some deet and now it hates itself.
Sneaky Spice, the unknown Spice Girl.
August 23, 2024 at 10:48 PM
Sneaky Spice, the unknown Spice Girl.
If The Wiggles don't make the Australian Olympic B Girl, RayGun, an official Wiggle I'm gonna lose my mind.
August 10, 2024 at 2:32 AM
If The Wiggles don't make the Australian Olympic B Girl, RayGun, an official Wiggle I'm gonna lose my mind.
It's the small miracles that make every day worth it. Today I saw an Audi use a blinker on the freeway. Twice.
It might have been tougher raising Lazarus than doing that.
It might have been tougher raising Lazarus than doing that.
August 9, 2024 at 9:17 PM
It's the small miracles that make every day worth it. Today I saw an Audi use a blinker on the freeway. Twice.
It might have been tougher raising Lazarus than doing that.
It might have been tougher raising Lazarus than doing that.
Man, Trump really doesn't want to pick a vice president. He'll try anything to get out of it.
July 14, 2024 at 1:29 AM
Man, Trump really doesn't want to pick a vice president. He'll try anything to get out of it.
Me: slutty chicks that are a little slow should be called "whortoises"
NM: *that look*
Me" I mean they're a little slow but still tearing it up.
NM: *that look with a sigh*
Me: fuuuuuuuck meeeeee daaaaadddeeeeeee...
NM: *walks away in silence*
NM: *that look*
Me" I mean they're a little slow but still tearing it up.
NM: *that look with a sigh*
Me: fuuuuuuuck meeeeee daaaaadddeeeeeee...
NM: *walks away in silence*
June 10, 2024 at 7:56 PM
Me: slutty chicks that are a little slow should be called "whortoises"
NM: *that look*
Me" I mean they're a little slow but still tearing it up.
NM: *that look with a sigh*
Me: fuuuuuuuck meeeeee daaaaadddeeeeeee...
NM: *walks away in silence*
NM: *that look*
Me" I mean they're a little slow but still tearing it up.
NM: *that look with a sigh*
Me: fuuuuuuuck meeeeee daaaaadddeeeeeee...
NM: *walks away in silence*
Yelling "HAWKWARD!" at the baby hawk learning to fly in my backyard is not as funny to my neighbours as it is to me.
June 10, 2024 at 7:52 PM
Yelling "HAWKWARD!" at the baby hawk learning to fly in my backyard is not as funny to my neighbours as it is to me.
MAGA people should be called shitizens.
May 16, 2024 at 9:47 PM
MAGA people should be called shitizens.
If I was a member of the Paw Patrol I'd be a fat ugly Chinese crested and my catch phrase would be "won't no thang but a chicken wang (uncomfortably long pause) DIABEETUTH!"
May 9, 2024 at 11:51 PM
If I was a member of the Paw Patrol I'd be a fat ugly Chinese crested and my catch phrase would be "won't no thang but a chicken wang (uncomfortably long pause) DIABEETUTH!"
Hear me out. Paw Patrol is just Batman but if Bruce Wayne's parents were alive.
April 23, 2024 at 10:21 PM
Hear me out. Paw Patrol is just Batman but if Bruce Wayne's parents were alive.
What is this? An Onion headline?
Red Lobster considering Chapter 11 bankruptcy after $11 million loss
Struggling seafood restaurant chain Red Lobster is considering filing for bankruptcy as high costs and low sales ground the business.
www.dailymail.co.uk
April 18, 2024 at 11:32 PM
What is this? An Onion headline?
You know what I've never heard anyone say ever?
"You know what sounds good for dinner? How about mackerel?!? Mackerel sound good to you?"
"You know what sounds good for dinner? How about mackerel?!? Mackerel sound good to you?"
April 15, 2024 at 11:17 PM
You know what I've never heard anyone say ever?
"You know what sounds good for dinner? How about mackerel?!? Mackerel sound good to you?"
"You know what sounds good for dinner? How about mackerel?!? Mackerel sound good to you?"