natalie
@natalieguida.bsky.social
if found, return to bay view
she/her
she/her
Cancel me if you want, but at this point I skip political sketches on SNL.
December 15, 2025 at 1:59 AM
Cancel me if you want, but at this point I skip political sketches on SNL.
My grandpa doesn’t remember who we are most days but he is having a full conversation with my dad about Philip Rivers returning to football.
December 14, 2025 at 7:36 PM
My grandpa doesn’t remember who we are most days but he is having a full conversation with my dad about Philip Rivers returning to football.
Christmas Cookie Day is all fun and games until you actually start making Christmas cookies.
December 14, 2025 at 5:11 PM
Christmas Cookie Day is all fun and games until you actually start making Christmas cookies.
To think I was supposed to be on a date tonight but instead I’m laying on the couch texting Jake a dissertation on Charlie Berens’ standup.
December 14, 2025 at 3:21 AM
To think I was supposed to be on a date tonight but instead I’m laying on the couch texting Jake a dissertation on Charlie Berens’ standup.
Maybe I’m not a cinephile because I truly have absolutely no desire to see Hamnet.
December 14, 2025 at 2:24 AM
Maybe I’m not a cinephile because I truly have absolutely no desire to see Hamnet.
It’s pisses me off that when I got my oil changed two weeks ago they put standard wiper fluid in my car and not winter wiper fluid. Like wow, incredible my windshield is covered in salt but my wiper fluid is frozen.
December 14, 2025 at 1:47 AM
It’s pisses me off that when I got my oil changed two weeks ago they put standard wiper fluid in my car and not winter wiper fluid. Like wow, incredible my windshield is covered in salt but my wiper fluid is frozen.
Can I hire a Task Rabbit just to break down my cardboard and take out my it out to the recycling?
December 13, 2025 at 10:16 PM
Can I hire a Task Rabbit just to break down my cardboard and take out my it out to the recycling?
My uncle has never had his own Facebook so he’s been using my dead aunt’s Facebook and he just comment on a picture of my sister’s baby using his dead wife’s Facebook “can’t wait to meet him!” Very ominous tone.
December 13, 2025 at 6:02 PM
My uncle has never had his own Facebook so he’s been using my dead aunt’s Facebook and he just comment on a picture of my sister’s baby using his dead wife’s Facebook “can’t wait to meet him!” Very ominous tone.
I’m working from my sister’s this afternoon and we’re showing Cooper the Eras Tour movie for the first time but he fell asleep but we’re sitting here SOBBING to Long Live.
December 12, 2025 at 8:14 PM
I’m working from my sister’s this afternoon and we’re showing Cooper the Eras Tour movie for the first time but he fell asleep but we’re sitting here SOBBING to Long Live.
But who will see Steez with me next weekend since @jake.hashtag.biz is a dad now?
December 12, 2025 at 2:29 AM
But who will see Steez with me next weekend since @jake.hashtag.biz is a dad now?
Let me put on a dress and take me out for Tom and Jerry’s at some dark cocktail lounge.
December 10, 2025 at 9:45 PM
Let me put on a dress and take me out for Tom and Jerry’s at some dark cocktail lounge.
I think what my house is missing is a massive disco ball spinning slowly while I lay on the floor listening to Merry Christmas Please Don’t Call
December 10, 2025 at 9:04 PM
I think what my house is missing is a massive disco ball spinning slowly while I lay on the floor listening to Merry Christmas Please Don’t Call
Maybe I’m delusional, but I really think that new butter yellow license plate would pop on my black Outback
December 10, 2025 at 2:47 PM
Maybe I’m delusional, but I really think that new butter yellow license plate would pop on my black Outback
Got the express pleasure of having to push my sister’s hybrid out of like a half inch of snow.
December 10, 2025 at 2:30 AM
Got the express pleasure of having to push my sister’s hybrid out of like a half inch of snow.
Not to be a shrinkflation conspiracy theorist, but I bought a standard Kroger brand loaf of white bread this week and I stg these slices of bread are smaller than I’ve ever seen before.
December 9, 2025 at 6:13 PM
Not to be a shrinkflation conspiracy theorist, but I bought a standard Kroger brand loaf of white bread this week and I stg these slices of bread are smaller than I’ve ever seen before.
Did Jalen Hurts even show up to the fucking game? I didn’t even know QBs could do so bad. A fucking embarrassment. My KICKER even managed 15pts this week.
Anyways, go bird even in defeat. 😔
Anyways, go bird even in defeat. 😔
December 9, 2025 at 5:19 AM
Did Jalen Hurts even show up to the fucking game? I didn’t even know QBs could do so bad. A fucking embarrassment. My KICKER even managed 15pts this week.
Anyways, go bird even in defeat. 😔
Anyways, go bird even in defeat. 😔
Dry January? More like Drive January, because I’m gonna have to start driving for Uber after all the shit I’ve had to spend money on this month.
December 9, 2025 at 2:15 AM
Dry January? More like Drive January, because I’m gonna have to start driving for Uber after all the shit I’ve had to spend money on this month.
Truly nothing goes harder on a cold night than laying under a blankie in front of a space heater watching YouTube videos of men camping in the Alaskan wilderness in the winter with no tents.
December 9, 2025 at 12:23 AM
Truly nothing goes harder on a cold night than laying under a blankie in front of a space heater watching YouTube videos of men camping in the Alaskan wilderness in the winter with no tents.
One of my favorite parts of December is creating my own logic puzzles trying to figure out who has who for Secret Santas.
December 8, 2025 at 6:55 PM
One of my favorite parts of December is creating my own logic puzzles trying to figure out who has who for Secret Santas.
Sometimes I worry Don’t Worry Darling is actually, secretly, a masterpiece but I wasn’t in the right headspace to receive it upon its release.
December 8, 2025 at 3:07 AM
Sometimes I worry Don’t Worry Darling is actually, secretly, a masterpiece but I wasn’t in the right headspace to receive it upon its release.
Not my sister sending us a Snapchat of her at pickleball in 12 degree weather.
December 5, 2025 at 3:00 AM
Not my sister sending us a Snapchat of her at pickleball in 12 degree weather.
What I would really like to see is my pull tab wrapped.
December 4, 2025 at 3:05 PM
What I would really like to see is my pull tab wrapped.
The single girlies on tiktok are doing year end dating wraps again and once again, my nosey ass has so many follow up questions about their date statistics.
December 3, 2025 at 4:44 PM
The single girlies on tiktok are doing year end dating wraps again and once again, my nosey ass has so many follow up questions about their date statistics.
My embroidery machine is hands down the most expensive thing I own but it’s the greatest gift I ever gave myself.
December 2, 2025 at 11:26 PM
My embroidery machine is hands down the most expensive thing I own but it’s the greatest gift I ever gave myself.
Before everyone starts with the “no one cares about your Spotified Wrapped,” I DO!!! Post it!! Let me judge you!!! And please, judge me too!!! Taylor Swift was my top artist for like 7th straight year!! It’s embarrassing!
December 2, 2025 at 11:01 PM
Before everyone starts with the “no one cares about your Spotified Wrapped,” I DO!!! Post it!! Let me judge you!!! And please, judge me too!!! Taylor Swift was my top artist for like 7th straight year!! It’s embarrassing!