Right, I visited East Yorkshire recently and was surprised by the flat bits! Gorgeous county and contrasting landscapes.

Very serene looking, is this the Fens?

Oh golly.... this is an epic piece of cheese, how embarrassing!

Mr Topping has three shops, Edinburgh, Ely and Bath. They organise regular literary events and book talks. I have been lucky enough to attend several and formed an audience for the likes of Louis de Bernieres, Sebastian Faulks, Merlin Sheldrake and Mary Beard. Go to one if you can.

Your grandma is a style icon. They make a very dashing pair.

Me too, my whole professional personna resigned to the trash heap. Felt good and right, though.

I prefer a pikelet myself (less stodge) served smothered in lurpak and marmite ,obviously.

Nice effort but, where's the toast???