Michael
mpborts.bsky.social
Michael
@mpborts.bsky.social
Probably not social enough for social media. My opinions have never been those of my employer's.
JP got Tom Brady in the 6th round
November 14, 2025 at 6:42 PM
It's definitely the latter for me
November 14, 2025 at 1:26 AM
2025: Too many sex pests.
November 12, 2025 at 10:17 PM
Thank you! I couldn't recall the specifics.
November 12, 2025 at 7:44 PM
Someone please find the clip of Bomani Jones absolutely destroying Cain on like his last day on the air with ESPN radio.
November 12, 2025 at 7:36 PM
Will Theil or Musk be the first to clone Hitler?
November 12, 2025 at 6:29 PM
A "tea" made up of equal parts honey and white vinegar tastes disgusting, but it'll help
November 12, 2025 at 12:02 PM
But from that moment on, I understood that teachers and other authority figures don't necessarily know more than other people nor do they always know best. And that change served me well.
November 12, 2025 at 12:26 AM
He asked me the context and I showed him. Without missing a beat he said it meant the man was making loud noises. My mom was in disbelief until she confirmed this older meaning in the dictionary.

I also found out the other meaning and got a laugh.
November 12, 2025 at 12:26 AM
He suggested I pick a different book to read instead.

That was dumb, so I decided I'd ask my parents. After school, I asked my mom what ejaculating meant and she immediately told me to ask my dad.

That night, my dad (who was a farmer with a HS education, but who lived to read) what it meant.
November 12, 2025 at 12:26 AM
So I did what we were taught to do during free reading. I went to the vice principal and asked if he could tell me what the word meant.

He read the sentence. Then he read more. He took an unusual time reading it before handing the book back to me and saying it "wasn't appropriate" for me to read.
November 12, 2025 at 12:26 AM
Ms. Kingery was out that day, but we had the vice principal as a sub.

As I recall it, pretty early in the book, people are reacting to a disturbance and there is a lot of commotion. A woman is making a fuss "and her husband followed ejaculating".

I was not familiar with any form of that word.
November 12, 2025 at 12:26 AM
War of the Worlds, but it wasn't *just* because of the book. I was a pretty good reader from a young age and was fortunate to have teachers who didn't try to keep me reading at my grade level. So I saw cool alien stuff on the cover in 4th grade and decided I must read it.
November 12, 2025 at 12:26 AM
We're all trying to find the guy who wouldn't stand up to his college roommates.
November 10, 2025 at 10:06 PM
Please forgive the loose relation to the topic, but when my wife from Rhode Island explained to her very Italian-American friend from HS that pasta is in the ethnic food aisle in this part of the midwest, she briefly lost her mind.

All of this is to say that them and their nonas can get over it.
November 7, 2025 at 5:28 PM
Nearly literal enshittification
November 6, 2025 at 10:07 PM
The Trump V Hawaii special. John "Taney" Roberts strikes again.
November 6, 2025 at 9:06 PM
"For Fuhrer reading [...]"
November 6, 2025 at 8:21 PM
Episode to come out tomorrow as well instead of Friday?
November 5, 2025 at 5:20 PM