Trent Resin Ore

You are so valid for this. Like, I think farm animal ass generally is peak, but bulls specifically are so good. I need a big bull man to plop his ass on my face while he chews his cud, moos, and swishes his fly-swatter tail like *crazy*.

All the monsters in this dungeon are bottoms, unfortunately…they’d really appreciate it if you made an effort to get stuck with your cock out and facing upwards next time. That just makes the whole “monster ravage-ment” thing a lot easier for them.

ADDENDUM: Oh my god, I didn’t realize that this was literally a reference to an actual press conference he just did where he complained that there wasn’t enough tartar sauce and now I realize that I have a horrifyingly specific opinion in common with that bastard…

Do I still eat them? No. Do I sometimes crave one out of nostalgia because, as someone who grew up Catholic, I used to get them as a treat during Lent? Yes. (I always asked for extra tartar sauce)

Thinking about actual incest: 🤢🤢🤢🤢

Thinking about a random middle-aged or old man shoving my face into his sweaty asscrack and immediately overriding my brain into believing that he’s my loving, doting father/grandfather: 🥴🤪😵‍💫💦💦💦

Ya know how at county fairs they have greased pig contests where they grease up a pig and set him loose and whoever manages to catch it gets a prize? Do that to me with the PigLube™ and chase me around as I slowly transform. The Prize? A big, fat, dumb, buttsniffing, service top hog.

Catch me bellyflopping into the hot spring that turns you into an orc.

Dude, if anyone wants to zonk me they just need to catch me on a housework day, feed me pasta, and give me a glass of wine. Darn right I’m feeling sleepy, and I’ll do anything you tell me as long as I can do it lying down!

Hypnosubmissive, but in a “getting zonked into a beloved suburban golden retriever” kind of way. Chubby and overfed, dumber than a box of rocks, spoiled, receiving nonstop belly rubs…

Listen, I’m a freak and I’d teach him a lesson. I’m grabbing onto that cock, getting him rock hard, and polishing his cockhead until he’s squirting and begging me to stop!

So, I’m actively trying to learn to enjoy beer; partly for social reasons, partly because beer is aesthetically sexy (very masc DILF/bro coded); and I’ve only found I few that I can tolerate and even fewer that I *like*. I will say that fruity/sours can (in my opinion) actually be enjoyable.

What genre is this hypnotist? Slick, smooth-voiced cowboy at the honky-tonk bar? Sleazy mobster in an underground pool hall? Seemingly-sweet old man trolling the local college bar? Regardless, someone will soon be learning how to handle his balls and (ahem) “pocket” as he plays with their cue stick…

(Also, yes I realize I’m coming back into a burning building right now, but I’m going to hold my ground for as long as I can. Should this ship go down, I’ll have the same username on wherever I move next.)