i'll tell you what, i'm enjoying this night of making my haters my waiters at the table of success

It’s simple:

- News bloopers
- unlikely animal friendships

Everything else fuckin SUCKS

Sabrina Carpenter’s album is a comedy album but the mainstream media is not brave enough to say it

Don’t ask me if I’ve watched the pitt, I’m too busy watching 2 hr YouTube videos of 80s and 90s commercials

You know things have been going bad when you start only watching media from 1993-2010