Matt Eitner
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mkeitner.bsky.social
Matt Eitner
@mkeitner.bsky.social
130 followers 160 following 530 posts
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mkeitner.bsky.social
The 2 AM Seattle Dog is a lifesaver
November 18, 2025 at 6:41 PM
mkeitner.bsky.social
The bird in question
Screencap from Arrested Development. Michael is pulling a brown paper bag out of the freezer with a taped on, handwritten note reading: "DEAD DOVE Do Not Eat!"
November 16, 2025 at 8:13 PM
mkeitner.bsky.social
The Survivorship Bias diagram with a sub sandwich in the body of the plane
November 4, 2025 at 1:12 AM
mkeitner.bsky.social
Jays fans realizing they are actually in Hell when Cal goes deep again tonight
October 19, 2025 at 4:35 PM
mkeitner.bsky.social
October 18, 2025 at 1:07 AM
mkeitner.bsky.social
September 30, 2025 at 3:21 PM
mkeitner.bsky.social
Freedom
The Balatro victory screen with a banner for the Completionist++ achievement across the top of the screen
September 25, 2025 at 11:25 PM
mkeitner.bsky.social
R. Budd Dwyer moments away from eating his bag lunch
September 2, 2025 at 2:30 AM
mkeitner.bsky.social
August 30, 2025 at 10:00 PM
mkeitner.bsky.social
Seahawks game plan
August 16, 2025 at 3:26 AM
mkeitner.bsky.social
August 16, 2025 at 12:34 AM
mkeitner.bsky.social
August 9, 2025 at 5:35 AM
mkeitner.bsky.social
August 1, 2025 at 7:15 PM
mkeitner.bsky.social
🤪🤪🤪
July 29, 2025 at 3:16 PM
mkeitner.bsky.social
C O R N B R E A D
Golden brown cornbread in a skillet on a stovetop
July 13, 2025 at 2:12 AM
mkeitner.bsky.social
buds
July 7, 2025 at 7:04 AM
mkeitner.bsky.social
June 23, 2025 at 9:01 PM
mkeitner.bsky.social
lmao
A screencap of Tesla stock in free fall
June 5, 2025 at 6:59 PM
mkeitner.bsky.social
April 22, 2025 at 2:56 AM
mkeitner.bsky.social
Pressure washed the deck
April 12, 2025 at 11:33 PM
mkeitner.bsky.social
This pales in comparison to the sleek minimalist horror that was the Mariners Big Maple Bar Hot Dog
The Big Maple Bar Hot Dog. It is a maple bar donut with a hot dog link on top. It is a ghastly three shades of brown with an unsettling sheen.
March 29, 2025 at 5:45 PM
mkeitner.bsky.social
Screen capture of a tweet from @OkButStill that reads: Trump: The whole time l'm saying, what is this? There's two Jake Gyllenhaals. Then at the end you see this spider, maybe the biggest you've ever seen, huge, and then it goes to black. That's it. Ingraham: And just to be clear, this is a movie you saw. Trump: Well, I don't know.
January 27, 2025 at 11:29 PM
mkeitner.bsky.social
January 19, 2025 at 2:29 AM
mkeitner.bsky.social
Therapist: Thicc Ichiro isn't real he can't hurt you
Thicc Ichiro:
Misshapen graffiti of Ichiro Suzuki in his iconic pre-swing stance
January 2, 2025 at 11:32 PM
mkeitner.bsky.social
The Megamind "No Bitches?" meme but it says "No Bixes?", a spoonerism of Bo Nix, instead
December 20, 2024 at 4:05 AM