I get why James Earl Jones (if I remember right? I may be imagining this) issued limited permission for Star Wars to recreate his voice with AI for specific Darth Vader purposes after he passed, but this is just some bullshit.

Awww! Crows definitely remember the folks who help them out like that!

Six months later I was feeding them nuts, seeds, and occasionally potato chips on my front lawn. Now there’s at least a group of four to six, some juveniles and some adult, maybe younger adult but still adult.

I’ve only been doing it for about a year and a half, but they at least figured out where the food came from pretty quickly. I didn’t used to have crows in my yard, then one day Mr. Chandler said “hey, I saw a bunch of crows in the pine trees that way” so I started tossing out peanuts.

If it really was one of “my” crows it’s definitely been around long enough to see me feed them and the cats, chivvy the cats across the street, and feed both groups at a polite distance. And otherwise behave as though they’re both part of the flock. Family. Thing.

I would be really happy if the crows helped me out getting the cats into shelter and across the street safely and at speed and so on!

And they’re probably reason-capable enough to know that, while I feed both birds and cats, I’m not trying to feed birds TO cats. They eat there and cats eat here.

Anyway, intentional chivvying or not, the crows have now had peanuts because it is butt-ass freezing out there.

Blessings on the driver, it slowed down, either because they saw me about to run into the street or because they saw her, but just before that the crow also swooped in low, yelling.

(She is fine otherwise this would be a much more hysterical post, she went across.)

Only according to the people who are currently trying to write a bond movie, as far as I can tell.

The Daniel Craig bond movies tried to be a coherent sequential story, but they also didn't try to attach to any of the other Bonds.

Oh my GOD it was so nasty. The prep instructions I got were "8oz, 15m apart" and I could in fact chug 8oz, just about, but if I'd had to chug the entire bottle I would have thrown up. It tasted like Theraflu, but goopier.

Also you will need a responsible adult. They don't have to be your driver, although the clinic will call them that because they usually are. But you will need a responsible non-drugged adult to make sure you don't hurt yourself after, either by doing something you shouldn't or by delayed reaction.

Oh! If you have a day job (night job, whatever job), schedule time off work for both the prep day before (when you can't have ANY solid food and you have to drink the prep that will make you shit liquid) and the day of. The day of isn't as bad as the prep day, but take both off.

I got a jury duty summons for the prep day. That was a source of much hysterical laughter because WHAT. NO.

(I think they would have accepted a medical deferral, but it turned out my entire jury group was excused so it didn't have to come to that.)

(In the days leading up to mine, my Mom and two aunts hastened to assure me that they had polyps and everything was fine. If you have polyps, you too will most likely be fine. They happen. Like zits. But in your butt.)

Anyway, get the butt scoping because it's better than the alternative.

It should be a few drops, or a little splash in the toilet bowl (because the blood will dilute and it will look more than it actually is, but it shouldn't be very much). Polyps are also generally normal, they mean you have to get scoped in 5 years instead of 10, but they're nothing to worry over.

But the prep was the worst (you WILL shit liquid by the end of it, and it will suck, I highly recommend a bidet or improvising a bidet with one of those mobile arm shower heads, which is what I did) and after I felt normal, fine, and hungry.

If you have polyps removed there may be a little blood.

Every other time I've been under general anesthesia (tooth extractions, all of them) they won't let me walk out, they stick me in a wheelchair. This place basically ONLY does colonoscopies and similar procedures. There was a whole assembly line of people waiting to get butt scoped. So it was brisk.

Mostly because I was very wobbly for about five, ten minutes after. They gave me water: you cannot have ANYTHING by mouth for several hours before procedure. Not even water or ice chips. It SUCKS. So they gave me water and sent me out. They didn't even wheelchair me out; some places might.