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metalpritzker.bsky.social
Headbangers for Pritzker
@metalpritzker.bsky.social
120 followers 120 following 130 posts
Metalheads for the Big Man himself. No false metal, no ketchup on hot dogs.
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metalpritzker.bsky.social
Everyone on Wall Street reading the news, coming together, and walking up to their buildings' roofs while chanting
The post-chorus to House of Pain's "Jump Around." It consists of the word "Jump!" repeatedly.
April 4, 2025 at 8:12 PM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
That image of Daffy Duck saying "I thlammed my penith in the car door" but his face has been replaced with the American flag. It's not a good photoshop because this country doesn't deserve one.
April 3, 2025 at 2:18 AM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
Pedocon theory, once again.
An edit of a Fallenchungus comic, depicting a man in a photoshopped-in magahat loudly proclaiming his love for CP as two disgusted onlookers stare at him
March 27, 2025 at 12:11 AM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
The worst part of this is that I'll never know if this was a scammer, the real pete hegseth, or a guy who hacked pete hegseth's account
a (faked) text message convo at 3 am from an unknown number. the texter has bad spelling, which I reduced (but not eliminated) for ease of listening here. Unknown: bro its pete hegseth u gotta gimme 1000 dollars in itunes gift cards or were gonna nuke gremany receiver: what Unknown: haha Unknown: shid on floor
March 26, 2025 at 11:53 PM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
Once again, pedocon theory Does Not Miss.
An edit of a Fallenchungus comic, depicting a man in a photoshopped-in magahat loudly proclaiming his love for CP as two disgusted onlookers stare at him
March 18, 2025 at 8:44 PM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
Illinoisans. Primary this man.
Dick "Dopey for the GOP" Durbin
March 14, 2025 at 10:29 PM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
It's the only way to be sure.
A bluescale image of the Grim Reaper holding a skull. In a variety of fonts, a message reads "YEAH, MOTHERFUCKER, I'M INTO PACS...PRIMARYING ALL COASTOIDS"
March 12, 2025 at 5:30 PM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
Well, at least I don't have to make another Photoshop again
The Manowar "Warriors of the World" album cover, featuring a comically-overmuscled swordsman waving a flag in front of a bunch of warriors behind him, each wielding their own flags. In the original it was the American flag, but it's been Photoshopped to be the Illinois flag.
March 6, 2025 at 8:24 PM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
Damn, you mean this guy's a white supremacist? How shocking.
March 5, 2025 at 12:41 AM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
Canada rn:
the "another 20 trillion dollars to Israel" meme but now the text reads "another 20 trillion percent tariff on Tesla products and parts"
March 4, 2025 at 6:45 PM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
America falters. Illinois is forever.
The cover of Manowar's "Warriors of the World", featuring a comically overmuscled man carrying a flag that's been crudely photoshopped to be the Illinois flag
March 4, 2025 at 5:27 PM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
Tale as old as time
An edit of a Fallenchungus comic, depicting a man in a photoshopped-in magahat loudly proclaiming his love for CP as two disgusted onlookers stare at him
February 21, 2025 at 2:24 PM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
that "it's always morally right" meme. It says "You can always bully members of congress, it's always morally right." Man, I never noticed that there was vector art of some sort of towers going on in the background before I had to describe this. Neat.
February 21, 2025 at 2:39 AM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
Pedocon theory never misses
An edit of a Fallenchungus comic, depicting a man in a photoshopped-in mahgah hat loudly proclaiming his love for CP as two disgusted onlookers stare at him
February 17, 2025 at 7:58 PM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
Sweet Bro or Hella Jeff, I don't remember which one it is, falling down a flight of stairs and saying "It keeps happening"
February 2, 2025 at 6:15 AM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
Our governor has yet to miss.
The album cover from Sabaton's "Heroes". It features a soldier--presumably Allied--punching an opposing soldier--presumably Axis--in the face. JB Pritzker's smiling, sunglasses-clad face has been photoshopped into the Allied soldier's face so it looks that Pritzker is punching the Axis soldier.
January 30, 2025 at 2:22 AM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
ILLINOIS STAYS WINNING.
The album cover to Hammerfall's album "Unbent Unbowed Unbroken, which features a frost-covered warrior wielding a shield and hammer. JB Pritzker's face has been photoshopped in place of the helmet.
January 28, 2025 at 8:30 PM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
Mallgoth? Dio? MALLGOTH?!
"August was your Mallgoth Old School Rock Metal Moment"
December 4, 2024 at 2:58 PM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
I envision this as the absolute bare minimum. Realistically we would want the northern coast of Ohio too, but we can set our sights lower for now.
A hypothetical Blue Blob consisting of Michigan, Illinois, Minnesota, Wisconsin, the Great Lakes, and the northeastern three quarters of Iowa.
November 25, 2024 at 7:40 PM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
The top 10 most commonly used words from the top 20 most commonly-occurring topics among death, black, doom, and power metal songs.
it's a 10 by 20 diagram of the most common words in the metal genres discussed in the post. If somebody is pissy enough I will potentially type this out or provide better alt text but dawg right now I am not gonna type out 200 words.
November 20, 2024 at 3:30 AM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
Well, the Nurglites are gonna be happy about this one.
November 14, 2024 at 8:54 PM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
Illinois must not, cannot, and shall not fall.
The album cover to Hammerfall's album "Unbent Unbowed Unbroken, which features a frost-covered warrior wielding a shield and hammer. JB Pritzker's face has been photoshopped in place of the helmet.
November 13, 2024 at 9:29 PM
metalpritzker.bsky.social
Hope you folks like images of JB Pritzker awkwardly photoshopped into album covers, because

A: I'm not stopping, and
B: I'm bringing some over from Twitter for preservation's sake
A version of Kamelot's album cover from "Siege Perilous", photoshopped to have Pritzker sitting in the throne. The title has been changed to "Siege Pritzkerous" A version of the album cover from Exodus' "Shovel Headed Kill Machine," Photoshopped to have Pritzker driving the titular machine. The title has been changed to "Shovel Headed Construction Machine."
November 12, 2024 at 9:10 PM