Sheepishly raises hand.

I just read dozens of comments about Jimmy Fallon here, and this was the nicest one I could find.

the “no more participation trophies” people literally elected a guy who put a medal around his own neck that he got just for showing up somewhere

Best thing I've seen on the Internet in forever.

Like those old cartoons where the robot dishwashers were just robot arms coming out and scrubbing the dishes with sponges and soap like humans. At least those were meant to be jokes.