Melanie Branton
melaniebranton.bsky.social
Melanie Branton
@melaniebranton.bsky.social
Spoken word artist, Green Party member, lover of linguistics and cryptic crosswords, hater of plastic (she/her or they/them)
Fabulous customer service skills, guys
Shut your bitch ass up melanie
November 2, 2025 at 10:01 AM
Found this lying on the Bristol to Bath Cycle Path and did what it told me to!

If all of us picked up plastic pollution when we saw it, there'd be less of it in our oceans.

But, then again, if manufacturers stopped swathing their products in it we wouldn't have to, would we, @bahlsen.bsky.social ?
November 1, 2025 at 11:57 AM
Because I am a disorganised klutz, I have only just seen this lovely, lovely post. Thank you, Pascal, <3
the answer to 'how do I get myself back into writing poetry' is always, ALWAYS to watch, listen or read poetry.
It always lubricates the cogs in my brain and I need to put something to paper.
Thanks @melaniebranton.bsky.social !!

Go read and buy The Full English it’s informative and charming x
October 31, 2025 at 6:36 PM
@susiedent.com
Hi, Susie,
I am doing my show, The Full English, in London from 16th-20th September, and I would love you to see it. Let me know if you would like to come, and I will happily put you and a plus one on the guest list. You're fabulous!
August 12, 2025 at 4:57 PM
@richardosman1.bsky.social
Hi, Richard,
I am doing my show The Full English in London from 16th to 20th September, and I would love you to see it. Just get in touch, and I will happily put you and a plus one on the guest list
August 12, 2025 at 4:54 PM
I am hugely excited that The Cryptic Mystic YouTube channel has done a feature on one of my puzzles! Do check out this fantastic crossword tutorial channel:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Hgg...
How to solve a Cryptic Crossword - Walkthrough for beginners - No.122 Cockney Rhyming Slang edition
YouTube video by The Cryptic Mystic
www.youtube.com
March 5, 2025 at 11:37 AM
Reposted by Melanie Branton
The Global Plastics Treaty must include strong provisions for a just transition to safer and more sustainable livelihoods for workers and communities across the plastics supply chain, including those in the informal waste sector.

#BreakFreeFromPlastic #WastePickersDay
March 5, 2025 at 11:22 AM
Reposted by Melanie Branton
According to @unep.org, 60% of the plastic recycled across the world is collected by waste pickers. While their contribution to the community is vital, they are often unrecognised, unprotected and discriminated against.

#WastePickersDay
March 5, 2025 at 11:22 AM
FUN FACT! I love the way that Latin medical words sound all grown-up and stuffy and serious, but actually aren't...like if you move the MUSCLE attached to your PATELLA, you are literally moving the MOUSE on your FRYING PAN.

PATELLA is cognate with PAN and PATINA and PAELLA.
March 3, 2025 at 10:38 AM
PEOPLE IN THE NEWCASTLE AREA! I have a show on at the Hearth Arts Centre in Horsley, Northumberland on 20th March!

I need all the help I can get with publicising this, so I'd really appreciate your sharing it with those who might be interested:

www.thehearth.co.uk/whatson/the-...
THE FULL ENGLISH
www.thehearth.co.uk
February 28, 2025 at 1:28 PM
My show about the English language is playing at the Hearth Arts Centre, Horsley, Newcastle-upon-Tyne 20th March

Early booking advised - this venue is teeny-weeny!

www.thehearth.co.uk/whatson/the-...
February 24, 2025 at 6:21 PM
Reposted by Melanie Branton
A poem about being yourself, on The Dirigible Balloon, which might be useful for #EYFS #KS1 in #ChildrensMentalHealthWeek
dirigibleballoon.org/poem/What-I-... #EduSky
February 2, 2025 at 9:28 AM
FUN FACT! The word GREGARIOUS means TENDING TO GATHER IN A FLOCK OR HERD, from Latin GREX (FLOCK or HERD).

It's distantly related to the Germanic verb CRAM - apparently, GREGARIOUS types like to CRAM together in a tiny room. No, I don't see the attraction of that, either.
January 29, 2025 at 11:36 AM
FUN FACT: In the 19th century, they didn't have Primark and shirts were expensive, so men tended to take them off before they had a punch-up, to avoid scuzzing them up. And that is probably the origin of GETTING SHIRTY.
January 25, 2025 at 8:01 AM
Reposted by Melanie Branton
I’m done dating humans. I’ve got a better idea—
January 24, 2025 at 2:04 PM
I'm out and about a lot this year with my show about the English language. Today, I am delighted to announce I will be in Street in September!
www.strodetheatre.org.uk/event/melani...
Melanie Branton - THE FULL ENGLISH | Strode Theatre
Book tickets online for Melanie Branton - THE FULL ENGLISH at Strode Theatre today!
www.strodetheatre.org.uk
January 24, 2025 at 11:00 AM
VERY NICHE JOKE: I've been traumatised by studying Middle English grammar, and now I'm suffering from PDSE.
January 21, 2025 at 6:47 AM
I'm deeply honoured and very excited to be performing alongside this amazing line-up of poets at this FREE gig at The Greenbank on 29th January. Please come!
January 15, 2025 at 6:22 PM