Matthew Randall
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matthewrandall.bsky.social
Matthew Randall
@matthewrandall.bsky.social
I have been awake since before the breaking of the first silence.

In that time, I've had many names!
Well here we are.
November 9, 2025 at 5:42 PM
Omigerd.
November 7, 2025 at 10:46 PM
- It was him that had put it there!
- I had better not shake his hand then!
November 7, 2025 at 10:42 PM
"That means it was called Chuck's Fucks and Sucks!!!"
November 7, 2025 at 10:29 PM
November 2, 2025 at 8:16 PM
Twitter right now
November 2, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Ah, better not read the next novel then.
November 2, 2025 at 2:50 AM
To think this cretinosaurus and his playmates got to decide the UK's future.
October 26, 2025 at 9:27 PM
October 26, 2025 at 3:15 PM
October 25, 2025 at 4:07 PM
October 24, 2025 at 2:42 PM
October 22, 2025 at 5:06 PM
That is Photoshopped. This is the original:
October 22, 2025 at 2:46 PM
October 22, 2025 at 10:11 AM
I watched the whole South Park episode in a state of bafflement, expecting an explanation that never came. Hate it when that happens.
October 21, 2025 at 10:05 AM
Is that the judge inspecting your work?
October 20, 2025 at 7:44 PM
October 20, 2025 at 2:44 PM
These individuals are also believed to have created a diversion by making a racket on the Seine facade of the building.
October 19, 2025 at 2:54 PM
"T, you're a management consultant, aren't you? " "Waste management, you mook"
October 19, 2025 at 2:48 PM
French police have released an artist's impression of their main suspect for the Louvre heist this morning.
October 19, 2025 at 1:03 PM
We've all seen them, those bloody ponces.
October 17, 2025 at 7:13 PM
October 17, 2025 at 5:49 PM
The dumbest time... so far.
October 17, 2025 at 3:01 PM
Jay was warned repeatedly that she would not make "the problem" go away by joking about waffles or ignoring it. One week on...
October 16, 2025 at 5:36 PM
"and once we have reverse-engineered this war device, we will be 200% purer warriors."
October 16, 2025 at 11:09 AM