Matthew J Elliott
@matthewjelliott.bsky.social
Award-winning scriptwriter, voice talent, contributor to RiffTrax, Big Finish, Imagination Theatre. Riffs on Patreon.
Banning kids from enjoying pop music. Never known to fail.
November 17, 2025 at 5:05 PM
Banning kids from enjoying pop music. Never known to fail.
Why you should never Google yourself.
No, very little, and yes.
No, very little, and yes.
November 15, 2025 at 8:39 PM
Why you should never Google yourself.
No, very little, and yes.
No, very little, and yes.
Wasn't she a lawyer before becoming the most frequently-fired presenter on TV?
How does she not understand that "barely Legal" is still ILLEGAL? And now she wants to change the goalposts on what should be considered pedophilia and abuse!
How does she not understand that "barely Legal" is still ILLEGAL? And now she wants to change the goalposts on what should be considered pedophilia and abuse!
November 14, 2025 at 12:48 AM
Wasn't she a lawyer before becoming the most frequently-fired presenter on TV?
How does she not understand that "barely Legal" is still ILLEGAL? And now she wants to change the goalposts on what should be considered pedophilia and abuse!
How does she not understand that "barely Legal" is still ILLEGAL? And now she wants to change the goalposts on what should be considered pedophilia and abuse!
There's a spray-tan joke in the latest "true colours" clickbait.
November 11, 2025 at 12:44 PM
There's a spray-tan joke in the latest "true colours" clickbait.
He's only been allowed to appear on every other episode of Question Time, how is that fair?
November 10, 2025 at 4:46 PM
He's only been allowed to appear on every other episode of Question Time, how is that fair?
I'll allow this one.
November 9, 2025 at 3:05 PM
I'll allow this one.
Just when I thought we weren't going to get our "true colours" clickbait for the week!
November 8, 2025 at 10:42 PM
Just when I thought we weren't going to get our "true colours" clickbait for the week!
Punxsutawney Phil sees daylight more often than Mike Johnson.
November 3, 2025 at 5:06 PM
Punxsutawney Phil sees daylight more often than Mike Johnson.
Fans react with shock as new Doctor Who announced:
November 1, 2025 at 12:30 PM
Fans react with shock as new Doctor Who announced:
I can beat that record.
October 29, 2025 at 2:37 PM
I can beat that record.
I can beat that record.
October 29, 2025 at 1:03 PM
I can beat that record.
"You can't grow prejudiced gobshites."
"Yes, you can!"
"Yes, you can!"
October 28, 2025 at 1:28 PM
"You can't grow prejudiced gobshites."
"Yes, you can!"
"Yes, you can!"
Another addition to my "true colours" clickbait collection.
October 26, 2025 at 7:29 PM
Another addition to my "true colours" clickbait collection.
Even Goldfinger thinks this is too much gold.
October 23, 2025 at 5:27 PM
Even Goldfinger thinks this is too much gold.
Chapter titles for the Man From Uncle novel The Monster Wheel Affair. Publisher A A Wyn did not pay well, as the author let the world know in acrostic form.
October 22, 2025 at 8:31 PM
Chapter titles for the Man From Uncle novel The Monster Wheel Affair. Publisher A A Wyn did not pay well, as the author let the world know in acrostic form.
So the actual President of the United States, posted an AI video of himself wearing a crown, and dumping excrement on those attending the 'No Kings' march.
And to think, LBJ getting caught on tape saying the word "bunghole" was once considered unpresidential.
And to think, LBJ getting caught on tape saying the word "bunghole" was once considered unpresidential.
October 19, 2025 at 3:02 PM
So the actual President of the United States, posted an AI video of himself wearing a crown, and dumping excrement on those attending the 'No Kings' march.
And to think, LBJ getting caught on tape saying the word "bunghole" was once considered unpresidential.
And to think, LBJ getting caught on tape saying the word "bunghole" was once considered unpresidential.
Is it that time of year already? Seems like the baby from the Nevermind album cover losing a legal case against Nirvana gets earlier and earlier.
October 2, 2025 at 3:30 PM
Is it that time of year already? Seems like the baby from the Nevermind album cover losing a legal case against Nirvana gets earlier and earlier.
"Your mother is called Mary? Mine's called Martha - let's fight!"
September 27, 2025 at 6:42 PM
"Your mother is called Mary? Mine's called Martha - let's fight!"
And the Old Faithful of clickbait is back.
September 27, 2025 at 8:11 AM
And the Old Faithful of clickbait is back.
Samuel West must be very surprised to be informed by the Express that he's dead.
September 21, 2025 at 3:37 PM
Samuel West must be very surprised to be informed by the Express that he's dead.
Starting to worry that my profile pic on the Doctor Who wiki (which was taken from the RiffTrax site, where it signifies that I'm the British one, or was, until Ian Potter became the other British one) gives the impression that I'm of the flag shagging crowd.
September 13, 2025 at 11:48 AM
Starting to worry that my profile pic on the Doctor Who wiki (which was taken from the RiffTrax site, where it signifies that I'm the British one, or was, until Ian Potter became the other British one) gives the impression that I'm of the flag shagging crowd.
Damn, if those "true colours" won't get you every time.
September 10, 2025 at 1:46 PM
Damn, if those "true colours" won't get you every time.
Not his "true colors"! Say it isn't so!
September 9, 2025 at 11:53 AM
Not his "true colors"! Say it isn't so!
The "true colours" clickbait continues...
September 6, 2025 at 1:51 PM
The "true colours" clickbait continues...