Matt Cohen
@mattcohen.bsky.social
Eisner Award nominee for "The Ghastlygun Tinies." Writes for MAD Magazine, The American Bystander, and The New Yorker. Created the hit card game Too Many Monkeys. Working on books for YOU. He/Him
Elmo did it better:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=SzYs...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=SzYs...
Testing the Hokey Pokey Dancing Elmo
YouTube video by RaisingOurBoys
www.youtube.com
November 11, 2025 at 10:59 PM
Elmo did it better:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=SzYs...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=SzYs...
I've been searching for a new agent for years now, but I regret *nothing.*
Well, I regret many things -- but none of them have anything to do with firing my agent.
Well, I regret many things -- but none of them have anything to do with firing my agent.
November 11, 2025 at 9:23 PM
I've been searching for a new agent for years now, but I regret *nothing.*
Well, I regret many things -- but none of them have anything to do with firing my agent.
Well, I regret many things -- but none of them have anything to do with firing my agent.
I need a new literary agent, too. I fired my old one for repping a transphobic book. (I later learned that he had a TERRIBLE reputation on top of that.)
November 11, 2025 at 5:53 PM
I need a new literary agent, too. I fired my old one for repping a transphobic book. (I later learned that he had a TERRIBLE reputation on top of that.)
The entire room is populated by people who are furious that somewhere in America a kid was given a participation trophy.
November 11, 2025 at 2:49 PM
The entire room is populated by people who are furious that somewhere in America a kid was given a participation trophy.
Everybody thinks that... until Camilla enters the fray.
November 11, 2025 at 7:16 AM
Everybody thinks that... until Camilla enters the fray.
It's wild how I can still recall the name "Willie Horton" from 1988 campaign ads... but we hardly hear anything about these Trump-pardoned menaces.
November 11, 2025 at 1:28 AM
It's wild how I can still recall the name "Willie Horton" from 1988 campaign ads... but we hardly hear anything about these Trump-pardoned menaces.
Big deal. I stopped 5 wars before lunch today and I'm on track to have another 12 stopped before bedtime. Maybe more.
November 11, 2025 at 12:35 AM
Big deal. I stopped 5 wars before lunch today and I'm on track to have another 12 stopped before bedtime. Maybe more.
It's like that famous Winston Churchill quote: "I personally don't agree with Neville Chamberlain's appeasement strategy, but it's important that I don't spend any energy opposing it."
November 10, 2025 at 11:58 PM
It's like that famous Winston Churchill quote: "I personally don't agree with Neville Chamberlain's appeasement strategy, but it's important that I don't spend any energy opposing it."
We need those things... and the caucus just gave up the only leverage they had.
November 10, 2025 at 11:54 PM
We need those things... and the caucus just gave up the only leverage they had.
Prove that you actually oppose it by naming and shaming the people who voted "yes." If you can't, you're complicit in the plan to let those 8 Senators be the fall guys.
November 10, 2025 at 11:52 PM
Prove that you actually oppose it by naming and shaming the people who voted "yes." If you can't, you're complicit in the plan to let those 8 Senators be the fall guys.
I don't know how it's playing on Twitter, but every single time I look at a Senator posting on Bluesky about how THEY'RE voting "no" and how THEY'RE fighting this... the majority of replies basically say "Prove it by asking Schumer to resign." People aren't falling for their plan.
November 10, 2025 at 10:52 PM
I don't know how it's playing on Twitter, but every single time I look at a Senator posting on Bluesky about how THEY'RE voting "no" and how THEY'RE fighting this... the majority of replies basically say "Prove it by asking Schumer to resign." People aren't falling for their plan.
If you were a stock trader and you heard about a company where all of the executives had to regularly gather around the CEO for praise-giving sessions... you'd short the company. And you'd get rich doing it.
November 10, 2025 at 9:01 PM
If you were a stock trader and you heard about a company where all of the executives had to regularly gather around the CEO for praise-giving sessions... you'd short the company. And you'd get rich doing it.
Are you going to call on Schumer to resign? Are you going to name and shame the people who voted "yes"?
If you don't do those things... then you can't claim to oppose what happened because you're complicit in the plan to let 8 of your colleagues take the fall for the rest of you.
If you don't do those things... then you can't claim to oppose what happened because you're complicit in the plan to let 8 of your colleagues take the fall for the rest of you.
November 10, 2025 at 7:52 PM
Are you going to call on Schumer to resign? Are you going to name and shame the people who voted "yes"?
If you don't do those things... then you can't claim to oppose what happened because you're complicit in the plan to let 8 of your colleagues take the fall for the rest of you.
If you don't do those things... then you can't claim to oppose what happened because you're complicit in the plan to let 8 of your colleagues take the fall for the rest of you.
He's supposed to be great at reading data... but he can't even read English.
November 10, 2025 at 6:43 PM
He's supposed to be great at reading data... but he can't even read English.
Denounce the people who voted "yes" by name. Because right now it's hard to believe that they weren't just chosen to be the fall guys this time around.
November 10, 2025 at 7:03 AM
Denounce the people who voted "yes" by name. Because right now it's hard to believe that they weren't just chosen to be the fall guys this time around.
Will you name and shame the senators who voted to betray us? Will you call for Schumer's immediate resignation?
November 10, 2025 at 7:00 AM
Will you name and shame the senators who voted to betray us? Will you call for Schumer's immediate resignation?
You say that "we" need to turn our anger into action. Define "we," Ed. If you mean American citizens... they already did that. They took to the streets BEGGING to be heard. And they were ignored by your colleagues. So I hope that you mean "we the elected officials."
November 10, 2025 at 6:55 AM
You say that "we" need to turn our anger into action. Define "we," Ed. If you mean American citizens... they already did that. They took to the streets BEGGING to be heard. And they were ignored by your colleagues. So I hope that you mean "we the elected officials."