could you imagine, leaving a voicemail that's like "I'll be unavailable for x until y for my annual month-long vacation to spain. Toodles". Nothing could give me more joy, I feel serene just imagining recording it

its really funny to have been shaped by your childhood to be an unusually observant and gifted liar but incapable of ever doing it for your benefit

me, a narcissist? well wouldn't that be nice

I want to die in Oslo. But I don't know how to make a life there, first. I don't know how to build it, set it up. I have nothing to offer.

I'm going to join a service in half a year and it's going to be both the best and worst decision I've ever made in my life. Imagine me being happy. I truly can't. I don't know what it looks like or how to get there.

im not in therapy but I wish I was. instead I'm working 40 hrs a week and eating meals that would make my meal prepping college-self drown himself and I'm still paying 95% of my paycheck to basic living expenses. no time or money, very cool

schizoid gang you know we take it real personal when our therapist tries to stifle a yawn. just really let it all in and completely fall apart, like full on crying in the car. sitting down in the shower. ass on the ground. hot water runs out fast this time of year

schizoid gang you know we up strengthening our anti-libidinal ego while keeping that libidinal ego low key so we can continue our symbiotic strivings before exhausting ourselves and engaging in a period of complete dismissive avoidant withdrawal to recover before doing it all again

who up and flawlessly slipping into their False Self at the first sign of conflict with another due your inability to express anger and boundaries

yeah when unemployed I'm always rationing food and I'm so hungry I'm too dizzy to drive or stand too long or walk a lot but my brain gets real crazy on my rapidly fluctuating blood sugar and I really get to focus on some hobbies

only thing worse than being employed is being UNemployed amiright huehue WRONG it ROCKS being UNEMPLOYED

I could have been Norwegian. Instead I'm From Florida

nvm I hate my job I hate my coworkers I hate myself and I hate god for putting me on this earth here and now

1 month ago I was working 12 hour shifts back to back as a veterinary assistant for a soulless corporation (that's going under lmao) but NOW??? I Do The Email

Am trying to be funny, am I trying to be quiet but respectful, what is going on here. Are they do most of the talking, am I? Completely out of my depth. But! I need money, and experience, and no one else is going to throw me an HR Assistant bone without a degree, so off I am